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I visited a Waldorf school today

post #1 of 23
Thread Starter 
I went to visit a Waldorf school today and it looks so great! Everything looks so.., I don't know, so magical or something. So Waldorfi I guess. The kids looks nice, the teachers look like those warm and fuzzy aunties that bake bread and cook. In the kindergarden room there is a smell of a freshly baked apple pie. There are art crafts everywhere. There is a fabulous fruit and vegetable garden for the kids and a boutique stocked with great books and toys. It just all looks so appealing and nice...

I do want to homeschool. I agree 100% with the homeschooling idea, I read my fair share of Holt, Gatto and others. I am so confident in my choice to homeschool. So why is my confidence suddenly shaken by the visit to a Waldorf school? I can't help but thinking - wouldn't my DD be better in a school like this?

Any thoughts?
post #2 of 23
Mine went to Waldorf for kindergarten. We left for a variety of reasons - like anything, the reality isn't always the same as the vision you might get from what's shown. Some have good experiences in schools of all kinds, and some don't. Many of my friends left Waldorf as well, and one tried out another one before giving up on the idea for her children (even though she was teaching in one). Her children ended up much happier in public schools - as have those of others I've spoken with. I've always been very grateful that we found out about homeschooling as early as we did - I can't say enough about how wonderful it was for our family. There's nothing like the freedom and independence and individuality you can have outside of a school setting, and that tuition money could cover a whole lot of delightful materials and travels. Lillian

post #3 of 23
But then think of all that family time your child would be missing . . .

(I do hear ya, though. I sometimes have second guesses but ultimately no one can love my child in the way that I do. That pretty much trumps every card out there.)
post #4 of 23
Totally get it...there are still many good reasons to homeschool as others have said...

But for us...the choice to homeschool first was because we had no good school options, there are many other reasons now. But honestly, if I lived near a good Waldorf school and could afford it, I'd be inclined to send my children.

But then I'd think of all the money I could save by homeschooling them...those schools are VERY expensive.
post #5 of 23
I'll be honest. If there were a true Waldorf school near me that didn't cost more than my husband made in a year, I'd probably send my children in a heartbeat. Two of them attended a Waldorf inspired lab school at a University for pre-school, and it was just wonderful. And part of the reason is that I try to do a lot of Waldorf styled things with them now, but there's no way I can afford some of the things (ie Beeswax crayons cost way more then 25 cent Crayolas do at Back to School time, the play kitchen made of natural materials is 4 x what I paid for the Little Tyke one.)


But since this option is a pipe dream for me, I am happy to homeschool them. It also allows me to be more eclectic and adjust to each childs' needs, because while Waldorf has a style that mostly works well for my boys, my 9 year old really loves doing his Singapore math.
post #6 of 23
I would not send my child to a Waldorf school, no matter how lovely it seemed, because the religious and philosophical underpinnings of Waldorf make me squirm. Among other things, I do not believe that children universally adhere to the schedule Steiner lays out for their development.

If you aren't already familiar with Steiner's beliefs and how they influence Waldorf schools today, I would suggest investigating them thoroughly. It might allow you to regain peace with your decision to homeschool.
post #7 of 23
I did some training at Waldorf schools. Although some aspects were lovely, I didn't find it challenging enough (until the older grades).

I ended up with Montessori which I still love. If I could afford it, I would send my son to the Montessori school I worked at.
post #8 of 23
Quote:
Originally Posted by skueppers View Post
I would not send my child to a Waldorf school, no matter how lovely it seemed, because the religious and philosophical underpinnings of Waldorf make me squirm. Among other things, I do not believe that children universally adhere to the schedule Steiner lays out for their development.

If you aren't already familiar with Steiner's beliefs and how they influence Waldorf schools today, I would suggest investigating them thoroughly. It might allow you to regain peace with your decision to homeschool.
Yes, this, and for other reasons. I do agree that the classrooms seem lovely.
post #9 of 23
i have to be honest, i think most of us (especially new homeschoolers) if we walked into a school where it smelled like apple pies, had gardens, awesome waldorf toys & centers, and the teachers looked warm and fuzzy, etc... who wouldn't be tempted? who wouldn't for a brief moment think, "am i doing the right thing???". my advice (or thoughts) are do NOT visit schools anymore!!!

if you really are 100% sure you want to homeschool, then don't do that to yourself, ykwim? when i first decided to homeschool, i was really unsure of myself (but that seems to dissipate with each year of success). i seriously couldn't have dealt with visiting awesome schools. in the beginning, i didn't have a lot of faith in my abilities, but i truly believed in my heart that homeschooling was the best path. i still only commit to one year at a time, as anything more still overwhelms me

my point is, if you are 100% sure of homeschooling, than only focus on things that will prepare you for that path. your dd is still very young, and you have so much time to ease into things and feel totally equipped and prepared. anyway – that’s my 2 cents. hugs to you!
post #10 of 23
Quote:
Originally Posted by sophi4ka View Post
I do want to homeschool. I agree 100% with the homeschooling idea, I read my fair share of Holt, Gatto and others. I am so confident in my choice to homeschool. So why is my confidence suddenly shaken by the visit to a Waldorf school? I can't help but thinking - wouldn't my DD be better in a school like this?
We had always planned on HS'ing until I fell in love with the Reggio Emilia approach to learning. When ODD was little I went and toured a local RE school. I was floored. Their atelier (art studio) was something right of a dream. The manipulatives, the centers, the staff, everything about it made me feel like there was no way I could duplicate this at home. I did loose confidence in myself and started comparing what I could do at home to this school and there was no comparison. We enrolled her in K and she's now in 3rd grade at this same school.

We have a younger DD who is 5, and we have learned lots of valuable lessons over the years. One of them being that my ideal environment may not be what my kids need. The other being that I sold myself short and hindsight being 20/20, ODD would have possibly been better served having schooled at home instead of going to that beautiful RE school. We are doing a cyber charter for K with YDD this year having learned that while the program at ODD's school was beautiful, it didn't meet all of her needs. Her younger sister is more like her then she is me so we figured the school wouldn't be the perfect fit I had imagined for her either.

ODD desires to school at home next year and leave her school in order that she may set the pace of her learning and focus on things that really interest her. I have the confidence now to do it, so that's the current plan. She's choosing to leave this beautiful environment, with all it's amazing offerings in order to stay at home.

It's easy to get sucked into all of the bells and whistles of a beautiful school. If you remove the superficial things what is that your child needs? What you are seeing at the school is all surface items, it's like window shopping or a great ad campaign. Take a step back and instead of comparing yourself to them, compare them to you.

GL!
post #11 of 23
I know what you mean. In August when we were exploring all of our options for K before officially deciding on hsing, I toured a few of the alternative private schools. Although our local Waldorf school looks like a page from a fairytale book, I agree w/ pp that its underlying philosophy gives me the creeps. And although, Montessori has its ups, it lacks..... something.... THEN I found a great little alternative school, that seems to be a mix of all the best of the alternative philosophy.... but what it came down to it ITS STILL SCHOOL. Its 35 hrs/week away from home and family, its not real life, its not a place where my dc can truly explore their interests . BUT, I do think its very beneficial for hs kids to take classes outside of the home, be away from mom/dad a few hrs a week, be comfortable taking direction from others (professionals). We have a good friends who are very integrated into the Waldorf life style and school. They invite us to attend the seasonal celebrations at the school.... so we do experience some of the beauty of Waldorf.
post #12 of 23
Just another thought . . . I'm in the process of reading Hold Onto Your Kids and it stressed just how valuable and necessary it is for children to remain with their parents for as long as possible. It's a great read in general, but I think especially for homeschoolers to remember that home is always better than being away from home. That's why nice schools are always trying to LOOK like home (and costing a ton to do so, I may add).
post #13 of 23
Quote:
Originally Posted by EXOLAX View Post
It's easy to get sucked into all of the bells and whistles of a beautiful school. If you remove the superficial things what is that your child needs? What you are seeing at the school is all surface items, it's like window shopping or a great ad campaign. Take a step back and instead of comparing yourself to them, compare them to you.
That's the essence of the thing in a nutshell! - Lillian



post #14 of 23
Whenever I feel my confidence shaking, I try and re-read parts of this thread.

Life After Waldorf: http://www.mothering.com/discussions...+after+waldorf
post #15 of 23
Quote:
Originally Posted by LuxPerpetua View Post
Whenever I feel my confidence shaking, I try and re-read parts of this thread...
I didn't have time to read the whole thing, but I skimmed it and found some of the same concerns I'd experienced. I could go on and on, but I don't think that's appropriate here. I knew a number of parents who were getting so much of their own satisfaction from the tantalizing beauty and community that they couldn't be objective about their children's needs. They later, after finally leaving, admitted that had been the case, but they hadn't been able to see it at the time. And I saw the same thing in a different kind of private school that had wonderful features such as fabulous plays, field trips, and family celebrations that offered community for the parents. It's not as if many children don't do just fine in any school - some thrive! - but that can be the case in a public school just as much as in a private one. I wince when I hear parents put down public school and assume there's something inherently better about private ones - because I went to a number of private schools growing up, and my son went to two private schools, but none of them were more healthy than public ones we've experienced.

When you homeschool, you get lots of relaxed time together; you can make your own decisions with your family about everything; you get to spend your evenings in whatever way you want together; you don't have to rush them off in the mornings if you all feel more like having a cozy day at home or off on an adventure; you can stay up late and read as far into a book as you all want; you don't have to negotiate with other people outside your home in regard to important philosophical or educational decisions about your child; you can follow your own family's interests on your own schedule. School works great for lots of people, and I think it can be a wonderful thing - but homeschooling is a whole different path that can offer its own wonderful set of opportunities that were much more satisfying for my own family. - Lillian
post #16 of 23
Thread Starter 
Ladies, thank you so much for your responses! I am glad that I am not the only one that gets "seduced" into the Waldorfi things. Especially the superficial parts of it. I am familiar with teh Waldorf philosophy and don't like it at all. Its just the external "niceties" that do it to me, I admit . I didn't grow up surrounded by beauty, even on the contrary, I think I grew up surrounded by lots of ugliness, so the Waldorf things make me so warm and fuzzy. I really wish that I would grow in that kind of environment and not in the one I grew up.

I know its not the real world and you are right, my daughter probably doesn't need those things. Its just probably my own desires. I feel sometimes that its true not only for me - that lots of those cutesy kids' stuff (adorable playkitchens is one example) are just some sort of fetish for the parents. Something to satisfy their childhood desires that were not fulfilled when they were young.

I need to constantly remember this though, cause I tend to get stressed that I don't provide this to my daughter, whenever I get into Waldorf like environment (I have several friends with their kids in Waldorf school, so I am exposed to this from time to time). Like I don't have the nature table, we don't celebrate the seasons, we don't sing ritual songs, etc. Its just not our life and it would look weird in our family context. Probably if I would make a lot of effort I could bring some of the Waldorfi things into our house. Its just so different than how we live that it would really take lots of effort. And I would rather spend the energy (and money, frankly) on something else.

Anyway, those are my rambled thoughts Thank you all for support There is nothing like MDC when you need an advice
post #17 of 23
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by EXOLAX View Post
We had always planned on HS'ing until I fell in love with the Reggio Emilia approach to learning. ....

GL!
I am curious, what exactly made you disillusioned with the RE school?
post #18 of 23
I have felt this way in the past. I enjoyed visiting a Montessori and my friends' kids go to this cool Reggio Emilia school with like 8 kids and 2 teachers in the class (that school is in our old state, too far...) But I have these fleeting feelings like I'm a bad parent for not sending her to school. My whole life I have been conditioned that good parents send their kids to good schools and harp on their kids about homework and grades. So while I know homeschooling is the right thing, I occasionally get those "I'm a 'bad' parent by general society's standards! ah!" feelings. I've read enough to not care that much. Besides, the Montessori was out of our price range and all the other schools I'm interested in are too far.

Honestly, that school does sound pretty cool. Do you think your child would thrive in that environment? You could always test it out and see how your child does, take it day by day.
post #19 of 23
We fell into this. With Montessori, not Waldorf, but same thing. We went and visited as gorgeous school, everything so tidy and pretty, tons and tons of beautiful materials, nice teachers smiling and welcoming. And then we got a FREE RIDE (lucky lottery!!). So we decided to go for it.
Honestly, I think many kids who have thrived there, but it just wasn't for dd, and in the end, it wasn't for us. We did it last year, and again this year....until we had a soulsearching sit down and realized we really didn't want to send dd away to school, and she didn't want to be sent away..she wanted to be home. We pulled her out 2 weeks ago. It's been wonderful.
I think in a way, it wasn't so much that we wanted d dto GO there, it was that we wanted OUR HOME to be luike that beautiful, tidy place. So, we've worked on making our home the place we most want to be!
I understand the allure thuogh.
post #20 of 23
This is long, but I wrote a post on my blog about Waldorf School versus Waldorf Homeschool and here is part of the post, maybe it will help you:


"It actually does come up, even in Waldorf homeschooling circles, this question of, “Well, if you had all the money in the world, wouldn’t you put your child in Waldorf school?”

And our family’s answer is no. You will learn my bias toward Waldorf homeschooling in a moment, but let’s peak at the issue of school first.

PROS (or at least, hopes for a school!)

A community (hopefully!) of like-minded people gathering for festivals, understanding some basic anthroposophy, a community of general happiness with the ideas of the Waldorf curriculum as tailored to the soul development of the child. This can be very hard to find in a land of Well-Trained Mind homeschoolers and unschoolers.
A place where there are specialty teachers to bring things like eurythmy, foreign languages, woodworking, games.
Fabulous festival celebrations.
Some things, like Circle Time in Kindy and pedagogical stories in the grades , grouping children of the same temperament together, work well in a group at school and may not work nearly as well at home.
Great teachers who collaborate with parents as partners in education.
Hopefully the school will offer some of the other “extras” such as gardens and beekeeping and other totally enriching experiences for your child.
Hopefully adult opportunities for learning.

CONS (or at least possible cons):

Possibly long drive times to get to and from school. In my major metropolitan area, you pretty much would have to sell your house and go buy one by the only Waldorf school in our area, or spend a great deal of time in the car.
Tuition, fundraising outside of tuition, extra fees.
Some parents who have left the Waldorf school environment for homeschooling felt like they learned a lot more by homeschooling than by being at the school. For example, many parents told me they did not celebrate the festivals at home, only at school, and after transitioning to home they had to decide what the festivals meant to them and how to plan it, whereas at the school the festivals were planned and they had a part assigned to them.
Some parents who have left the school environment for homeschooling told me they felt that many parents were not on the same page regarding media in the younger grades and other areas, even with school policies set forth.
Some children truly do not function as well in a group environment in the younger grades. Some parents told me they felt their wild child really calmed down with Waldorf homeschooling as opposed to school, or that their shy child really came out of their shell with homeschooling.
Some parents have told me they felt the repetition of the early grades, the focus on group unity in the early elementary grades, or lack of individual attention and progress to a slower or faster learner were hard to deal with.
Waldorf Homeschooling PROS (yes, this is my bias)

Waldorf homeschooling is first and foremost about family. It is about spending copious amounts of time with your children, quantity time and really being there for all those little questions that come up during the oddest moments.
You can save your children a great amount of overstimulation by not having to drive in traffic, and save money by not paying tuition.
You will learn about Steiner, festivals and make them your own. You can fit your own faith into your homeschooling experience they way you want if this is important to you. You can tailor your blocks to your child – for second grade, for example, you can pick – there are the Saints and the animal trickster tales, of course but you can also pick “Cherokee Animal Trickster Tales” or Anansi the Spider or Robin Hood or American Tall Tales. You can pick stories where the meaning really speaks to the things your child is struggling with. You can pick what festivals you celebrate and how, with the whole family involved in building up to the festival.
You will develop your own skills so you can teach your child.
You can spend a vast amount of time outside.
You can go on vacation when you want, and take a day off when you need to attend to family business.
You can foster close bonds between siblings who may otherwise be separated all day in different grades.
You can show your child the warmth and work that goes into homemaking, and have time to do this.
Dad may be able to be more involved as you can work your homeschooling around his schedule as well, and homeschooling and learning becomes a family adventure. You start planning family things around the blocks you are studying – weekend field trips different places that tie into what you are studying. Grandparents and aunts and uncles can even get into the act!
You can move at your child’s pace within the curriculum. I still feel with the grades it is important to keep within the three day rhythm and use sleep as your aid, but you can do more math blocks than language arts blocks if your child is a language arts star and needs more work in math, you can work toward longer sentences in language arts if they have mastered shorter sentences earlier, or move ahead in math if they really get it.
You can honor your child’s development as it unfolds. Sometimes children do things that do not fit into the norm and need more time to just be.
With homeschooling, there is plenty of time for the child to play, to look at clouds, to make homemade salt dough, to just dream and be. Sometimes this gets lost in the hustle and bustle of any school if one is not careful.
Waldorf Homeschooling CONS

I guess this to me is a pro, but to many parents it is a con: You need to do your own inner work with this method. How do you feel about fairy tales? Saints and legends? The Old Testament as a story of a people’s relationship to authority? How do you feel about what comes where within the curriculum? This can be hard work for some people.
My thought on this: Aren’t these questions you should be looking at anyway?

You have to get to know your own community and your own resources. Waldorf homeschooling in the US Virgin Islands is going to look a lot different than homeschooling in Idaho, not because the building block in the Third Grade is going to change, but the local resources are different. A child in the US Virgin Islands might learn about the use of molasses as a building and binding agent, or the particulars of the cannonball tree in botany in addition to other cultures’ building methods and a child in Idaho may focus more on local things in addition to others’ building methods. This intimidates many parents, that their child “may not learn it all.”
My thought on this: Even a Waldorf teacher in a school has to pick and choose amongst possible blocks and available resources; just like you!

Being a Waldorf homeschooler can be hard in some respects when everyone else around you is homeschooling with other methods.
My thought on this: Start your own local Waldorf homeschooling group. Be a beacon for your area! Hang out with homeschoolers who use other methods, and be okay with that. Do what works for your family!

Some parents feel Waldorf requires intensive work.
My thought on this: All homeschool curriculums require work on your part. That is called teaching, as just opposed to opening a book and handing it to your small child. There are open and go kinds of Waldorf homeschool curriculums out there.

Some parents feel Waldorf homeschooling requires severe lifestyle changes.
My thought on this: Baby steps, people, baby steps. Homeschooling in itself is a lifestyle, no matter what method you choose. And the pink protective bubble of Waldorf Kindergarten does not last forever.

Waldorf homeschooling is not the same as Waldorf school at home.
My thought: Absolutely and that is one of the reasons I choose to homeschool.
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