7.5 mo--frequent retractions (I think!)

[annemoonstar]

Ok, I JUST found this forum and have been reading some of the threads--now I am worried! I have a 7.5 mo intact DS. It was DH's last minute decision not to circ (I left it completely up to him) so it wasn't really anything we looked into previously. Our ped wasn't in anyway surprised or upset about it, but he did retract it slightly (and has at EVERY well-child visit). He told us that we shouldn't force it, but that it naturally retracted. He also told us to clean out any white stuff we see when we pull the foreskin back. That is what we have been doing now for months! Have we caused damage?? DS doesn't seem upset by it, but his penis is occasionally somewhat red. I just put diaper cream on it and it seems to clear up.

What should we do from here??

Thanks!!

[kiara7]

Do nothing. As in stop any and all retractions and don't let your ped do it either. There is nothing to clean and nothing to see. Hopefully no major damage occured, but it needs to stop. Retracting to clean is an invitation for infections and scar tissue.

[GoBecGo]

Yeah, stop doing it, and stop your ped doing it from today. My dad was retracted for cleaning and ended up so scarred he had to be circ'd, so it can do serious harm. Hopefully in your case it hasn't, but stop now. A simple dip in the bathwater is enough to clean off a baby's penis, there is nothing under there to clean out.

[Fellow Traveler]

First off Anne, welcome to the board. I hope you'll stick around. And congratulations on your son and leaving him intact, such a lucky boy.

As to your care question, I'll concur with what has been posted. The best advice is to not retract, even a little. In infancy there are few, if any, reasons to do it and most boys are not even able to. There are two reasons for this. First, typically the foreskin is at least in part adhered to the glans and second the tip is usually not wide enough to pass over the glans. Both of these conditions change as boys grow. Some, even in infancy, have separated foreskins that could be retracted though most don't and it's better safe than sorry. So even if it seems not to bother him it's best not to do it since there is no reason to. I doubt there has been any damage done so don't worry about that and just for now only wipe, wash, rinse the outside or rather clean what you see.

Hope that helps. And if you have anymore questions feel free to ask.

[MCatLvrMom2A&X]

to what everyone else has said. There is just no reason to mess with it like that. It can cause problems so it isnt worth the risk.

The tip of the foreskin like the rest of the bumm area can get diaper rash and make it look red. Some tips are naturally red. The glans is supposed to be a bright red/purple because it is an internal organ like the vagina or inside your mouth.

In the future no one but your ds should ever try to retract even a little like I mentioned above it can lead to problems and isnt worth the risk.

[annemoonstar]

Ok, thank you all! How would you all handle the pediatrician issue? I really like the ped--he has been very supportive of our other AP choices (delayed/select vax, long-term BF'ing, co-sleeping, etc.). But this does make me question his advice! What would you do??

[MCatLvrMom2A&X]

If you wish to stay with him then I would bring him in a few print off of intact care and talk to him about how you have recently learned what he has been doing and what he told you to do was outdated and possibly hurtful and that you dont want him to touch you ds's penis any more. You can always refuse to allow an under the diaper check or you can just have a hands off policy if you think he will listen. If you need help with print offs let us now and we can dig them up for you.

Unless he out right ignores you or still tries to do it then you might be forced to find a new ped but if he is willing to listen and learn then stick with him.