Sorry, it took me awhile to calm down a little before I could even come back to the boards. I will attempt to explain what she nixed without throwing myself back into the anger/depression of yesterday:
What she is saying is that the "strapping down of the arms" is non-negotiable out of, I guess, some one-size-fits-all assumption that I will freak out and/or try to "help" with the surgery. She blamed it on "somnolence".
There will be no lowering of the drape or mirror, again out of some misguided assumption that the mother will freak out. Never mind that I'm a nurse and have attended many surgeries, and more than a few cesareans. But Heaven KNOWS what I'd do if I saw myself being cut open. Gawd this pisses me off to even type. ::sniff:: Her suggestion was "Just let your mom video tape it". Ok, but the sheet I got re/the surgery said NO VIDEO RECORDING. Furthermore, sure, I will just watch the birth of my son on tv later because it's ALMOST THE SAME &^%$#$%^ THING you stupid *&^%.
Sorry. Sorry. Finding my happy place....
Okay, moving along:
The weighing, and other 'routine tasks' are done in accordance to NICU protocol and are non-negotiable.
The baby will absolutely not go anywhere but into the warmer immediately after the cord is severed. No skin-to-skin allowed in the OR. Citing how disastrously unsafe it would be to even consider such an option, she wrote in big letters "NO! NOT TO HAPPEN!" across that bullet point.
I will not touch baby until recovery. Those arms simply MUST stay strapped firmly down. ::shiver::
Interns will absolutely be a part of the delivery, it is standard procedure that she is assisted by interns "I'm not going to do it all myself!" as if the notion were utterly absurd. How stupid of me.
I have been visualizing and praying like mad that I go into labor before the 20th. No one understands how badly I don't want this surgery. My family thinks it's just great that I can plan and get my mom down here and my sister can make plans for a back-up sitter while my mom is with me and my dad and brother can arrange to watch my older kids and - just -wow! How wonderful to be able to schedule a birth!
But you know what, if I went into labor naturally, randomly, and waited it out, called someone at the last minute - they would step up, watch my other kids, I know they would. And maybe they'd be inconvenienced, maybe they'd have to call into work, or leave work - but isn't that the way it's meant to be?? Aren't some things just supposed to follow their own course and aren't we just supposed to kinda go with that??