Would Montessori work for my guy?

[snomnky]

Hi-

I have a boy who is 4ys 4mo, he is a tough cookie... He is enrolled in a Montessori for kindergarten next year, but I have a lot of doubts.

He is NOT self motivated in the slightest. He is stubborn. He is incredibly bright, but socially immature. He is wild, lots of energy, loves to run, jump and talks ALL THE TIME. He wants to do what the others are doing, has a very hard time finishing his work if someone else has already finished...

He is thriving in a small Pre-K class (not montessori) he is one of 6 kids. The school is only 50 kids, 3yr olds through 5th grade. His teacher can be on him constantly and it is good for him. They have gym and recess everyday. He is the youngest in his class by 6mo, this works to his favor since he keeps up intellectually no problem, and can model their social skills. The school in expensive, we can't keep him there.

So, does he have a shot to thrive in Montessori or do we need to look into other options?

Thanks

[ADirrim]

Not only do I think Montessori would work for your child, but I think it would be extremely beneficial. Montessori believed that children aged 3-6 are in the process of consolidating their personality and that they have a NATURAL tendency toward progress and self-perfection. I know that her vision doesn't fit so well with your current description of your child (as bright but socially immature- stubborn, distractable, and unmotivated), but I feel very confident that a trained guide will be able to elicit his capacity for concentration, deliberation, initiative and self-discipline (Montessori writes that the guide is always looking for the child who is not there yet). To a great extend, Montessori consists in providing children with the optimal conditions to develop and flourish (surrounded by lots of growth promoting materials and an aware adult) and trusting that the child will reveal himself through work.

Montessori believed that children form their character in a predictable sequence. She thought that nature had endowed them with special interests of exceptional intensity. When the child pursues work that is really interesting to them, it acts upon the child and develops their personality. As a result, your child's guide will try to identify his interests and get him to polarize his attention (initially what the work is does not matter so much, so long as it is interesting to the child and captures their extended concentration). After concentration, comes perserverence, and self-discipline.

It is certainly too bad that he did not begin earlier in the cycle (that he will be entering the classroom community as a kindergartener and in the final year of the cycle) because this process works best when it builds upon the youngest child's natural desire for independence (toddlers generally show a really high amount of initiative and the Montessori classroom fosters this by giving the child as much freedom as they can handle and not routinely substituting adult authority for the child's judgment), but I have no doubt that a good Montessori school could be the optimal environment for the issues you describe.
Good Luck!
Abigail Miller
Longmont, CO
www.bloommontessori.com
www.bloommontessori.blogspot.com

[mamadebug]

I think it has the potential to be great for your son. I have a son who just turned 5, spent the last 2 years in a play based preschool and was impulsive, talks a lot, socially immature, etc. I have Montessori training, and was hesitant to put him in Montessori - many of the schools around here are really rigid and almost cold. I knew it wouldn't work for him. We finally found a very sweet, loving Montessori school for this year, and he is thriving. So many of the disruptive, immature behaviors are clearing up. The change has been amazing. He absolutely loves school. I think the orderly environment, the expectations for independence and all that entails, combined with the wonderful teachers has made it a great experience for him. So, like many philosophies, I think it can really depend on the teacher and how s/he implements the philosophy. But, it sounds like your little guy is a lot like mine, and it has been wonderful. At the same time, I have seen Montessori environments where I can only imagine it would not be a good fit for my son.

[carmel23]

I just wanted to add that at my son's Montessori school (grades 1-3) they have gym everyday. And they play outside every day--rain or shine.

There is a whole method of learning how to integrate the mind and the body through the Montessori gym program (it isn't just learning games, although there is a lot of that, too) but it is like a mind and body synthesis... and it is really good for my highly physical, super bright son.