Thanks, everyone! He is perfect, beautiful and healthy. We are both getting closer all the time to really getting the hang of nursing.
Here is the birth story. I'm compelled to write it right now because one of the midwives from the practice we used just came into the hospital room and acknowledged the grief that can come from a traumatic birth.
I had been losing clear white mucus Monday and Tuesday morning and all of a sudden late Tuesday morning, after I went to my mom and dad's house to hang out with my dad (brought my dog to hang with us, too), I started really losing my mucus plug and having bloody show.
Not too long after that, maybe about an hour, I started having contractions, but they didn't feel like I expected. They were all down low in front and I thought they would span my whole belly/uterus. They didn't.
Dad and I went for a walk, me making him nervous all the time because he thought maybe labor was starting. I thought maybe a walk would calm the cramps/contractions that were coming quite regularly, with little space in between.
We got home from about a mile walk with the dog and I could NOT get comfortable sitting on the couch, lying on the couch or floor or doing anything but hands and knees or standing and walking. Contractions were coming 2-3 minutes apart after only about 2-3 hours of laboring.
I called the midwife and she said to get in the bathtub, drink a bunch of water and the contractions would probably stop because it was unlikely this was more than false labor due to the frequency of the contractions so soon in labor.
I had my dad take me back to my house and the car ride sucked. I didn't think I'd make it home without being able to stop, get out of the car, and walk a little, but we made it. I got in the tub and drank a bunch of water, but contractions continued.
I called my husband and had him come home from work and we called the midwife again to tell her nothing was working to stop the pain. I could barely talk on the phone at that point, but the midwife insisted she talk to me. I held it together enough to talk to her a little, all the while on all fours on our couch, burying my head in couch pillows with each contraction. She said we could come into the hospital for evaluation, but she might have to send us home. She said if she didn't have to send us home, I'd be one of those "weirdos" that labor is very atypical for.
The car ride to the hospital was horrible. I got through it by moaning lots and trying to breathe, etc. Still no breaks between contractions at about 1.5-2 minutes apart. The midwife checked me and watched me through contractions. I was at 2+ dilated, but she let me be admitted because she determined I was, in fact, a "weirdo"!
I got to my room about 6 pm and immediately stripped naked. All clothes were too hot, everything was annoying other than silence, I could not be touched by my husband. I got into the tub in the room and stayed there for maybe an hour or hour and a half. I got out and started pacing the room. Contractions stayed about 2 minutes apart, NO BREAKS. I puked. I sat on the birthing ball. I could not get comfortable and was so miserable.
At 9 pm, I asked for pain relief and decided to go straight for an epidural, something I told myself I wanted to avoid. I told the midwife and nurse I felt like a wimp, but they said that this labor was NOT typical and I was getting no break in pain and there are no awards for needlessly suffering. So I got the epidural. It was all placed by about 10 pm. I was at 4 cm dilated.
At about 11:30ish pm, I was 9 cm dilated; the epidural really helped me relax. I was able to rest my eyes, lie down, and felt SO MUCH BETTER. It felt like the best decision ever.
A bit after midnight, I was fully dilated and ready to push, but not having many pushing sensations, so the midwife went to deliver one of four other babies for that night (BUSY woman!) and came back to my nurse a little after 1 am to tell her to have me start pushing.
We started pushing at 1:10 am.
An hour later, progress had been made, but no baby.
Two hours later, a little more progress had been made, but I could tell it wasn't enough.
Three hours later, after placing an internal monitor on the baby because the external one kept falling off my belly, the midwife called in the OB, who watched me push several times and felt the position of the baby.
She told me that I was still making maximum effort after three hours of pushing and being tired, but the ischal spines in my pelvis and the OP position of the baby and the alternating transverse lie of the baby were preventing him from being born vaginally. She really felt a c-section was in order.
What a disappointment. I had finally gotten down this "pushing" thing (pooping with every darn push, too...geez!) and my body wanted to keep doing it and it was more painful not to do it, especially as the epidural was wearing off....ugh.
The whole surgical team was assembled, my husband scrambled around getting our stuff together because we were going to end up in a different hospital room post-surgery, and I just started silently crying. The midwife looked really bummed, too.
The midwife came with me to the surgery room and held my hand while they prepped me for surgery; they made my husband wait outside during that time. I was super anxious/nervous and it was a horrible feeling.
I was finally numbed up enough again that they started surgery and it felt like it took forever, through my haze of fear and anxiety. They got the baby out and he cried right away and my husband and I cried. Hubby went with baby and I got stitched up. I was still so anxious I was shivering/chattering (also from the epidural) that they gave me anti-anxiety meds in my IV and by the time the baby was cleaned and ready for me to see, I could hardly keep my eyes open to look at him. It made me feel like a Bad Mom.
They took me to a recovery room, but I don't remember getting there because I was so out of it. They had my little Ethan latch on for the first time there and he did pretty well; hubby burped him for his first time.
About 6:30 am, we were in our room, Ethan having been born at 4:35 am.
What a long, crazy day and night it was. And there is some grief in my body not doing what I expected it to be able to do. But our baby is well and gorgeous and I love him so much. And I love my husband so much. Thank God we made all the choices we did; this would not have been a safe home birth for us.
So that's the long long story of Ethan Markham Scheeler's birth. Born Veteran's Day 2009.
