HBAC it is!

[John'sMama]

I had an appointment with a CNM on Tuesday, and had I not already been "prepared" as to what I'd hear through reading others' experiences, I would have left feeling very unsupported and felt I was already beginning my uphill battle. Instead, I left feeling happy, knowing and being confident with my decision to HBAC!

After introducing herself, the very first words out of her mouth were, "So you want to attempt a VBAC?" There were many other words used like "trial" and "aim for it" used throughout the appointment. Whereas when I talked to my lay midwife about VBAC the first time, she made it sound like yes, I can and will do that! Then the CNM told me my pelvis was relatively small in the front but I had "plenty of room in the back", but she wouldn't want a 10 lb baby. And she told me if I go to 41 weeks (I did with DS) I should "go ahead and schedule a section". Like I said, I'd heard all this before from others who went through a similar experience, but it was still frustrating.

So, bottom line, I'm going to HBAC. I think if I had a supportive CNM and if the hospital was very VBAC friendly, I may go that route. But as it is the above is not true. I think I just needed to try out a CNM to put my mind at ease that I'm making the right choice for a VBAC. And now I do!

[MsBlack]

Awesome!

Just remember to stay in charge of your health, your education, and your decisions with your hb mw as you think you would need to be in the hospital. Homebirth, any homebirth not just hbac, goes best IMO when families are essentially 'self managing', taking full responsibility for health and choices all along the way. Only YOU can grow this baby, and birth this baby....your knowledge, power, and trust is what will ultimately make it happen. Your mw is your partner, your helper, your facilitator--YOU are the woman who will grow and birth this baby!

have fun!

[John'sMama]

Originally Posted by MsBlack

Awesome!

Just remember to stay in charge of your health, your education, and your decisions with your hb mw as you think you would need to be in the hospital. Homebirth, any homebirth not just hbac, goes best IMO when families are essentially 'self managing', taking full responsibility for health and choices all along the way. Only YOU can grow this baby, and birth this baby....your knowledge, power, and trust is what will ultimately make it happen. Your mw is your partner, your helper, your facilitator--YOU are the woman who will grow and birth this baby!

have fun!

Wow--I'm going to print this out & read it whenever I start to doubt myself/my decision--what a great mantra! Thank you

[wbg]

Ms Black offers the best advice as always!!! And she always puts it so perfectly. I am so happy that you made this decision. Just wanted to offer the same sort of thing. Don't assume that because it is a MW or a home birth, that you will always see eye to eye on certain aspects of your care, or that each MW delivers the type of care you might have read in your "best birth story" ever!. So develop a comfortable relationship with your MW. One that is based on mutual trust and respect. You can still question her advice, offer input and other suggestions that you might want her to consider and give feedback on. Make sure you vocalize what aspects of your care are important to you. With both of you advocating for you and your baby, it is a winning team!! All the best for your pregnancy and birth journey!

In the last weeks of my pregnancy, my daughter and I were doodling. She drew a bunch of girly doodles and in the middle of it, out of nowhere she wrote: My Mom Can Do Anything! I don't know where it came from but it was just what I needed to hear. I taped it up in my birthing space and it was my home birth mantra! And she was right! Now it is my everyday mantra and I will share it with you.... John'sMama can do anything!

[ShwarmaQueen]

Awesome mamma! I just had my HBAC and it is so healing and empowering!

You can do it!!

[John'sMama]

Originally Posted by wbg

Ms Black offers the best advice as always!!! And she always puts it so perfectly. I am so happy that you made this decision. Just wanted to offer the same sort of thing. Don't assume that because it is a MW or a home birth, that you will always see eye to eye on certain aspects of your care, or that each MW delivers the type of care you might have read in your "best birth story" ever!. So develop a comfortable relationship with your MW. One that is based on mutual trust and respect. You can still question her advice, offer input and other suggestions that you might want her to consider and give feedback on. Make sure you vocalize what aspects of your care are important to you. With both of you advocating for you and your baby, it is a winning team!! All the best for your pregnancy and birth journey!

In the last weeks of my pregnancy, my daughter and I were doodling. She drew a bunch of girly doodles and in the middle of it, out of nowhere she wrote: My Mom Can Do Anything! I don't know where it came from but it was just what I needed to hear. I taped it up in my birthing space and it was my home birth mantra! And she was right! Now it is my everyday mantra and I will share it with you.... John'sMama can do anything!

All great advice; I do need to remember that even though my midwife is supportive, I still need to be completely involved and above all, listen to myself. I wish I'd had the courage to listen to myself the first time around! That's so cute (and empowering) that your daughter wrote that, and thank you for sharing it with me!!