Originally Posted by guestmama900
Ok, another update.
I wasn't too worried about overnights - the last one went very well.
NOW though, I'm VERY worried about overnights. The CPS social worker came back tonight - baby was in a GREAT mood, and was laughing and playing with me. We had a good time while she was here. She asked more questions, talk to me some more about how things are going.
She also told me that she got an email from someone (she can't say who of course) telling her to investigate whether or not I'm hitting the baby. Umm...NO I'M NOT. Thankfully she seemed to think it was a ridiculous allegation, and the baby only has a small bruise on his head from falling into the dresser earlier (both me and my mom were right there, so she saw it too). I don't even think the social worker saw it, its really small and hardly noticeable.
xBF has a very long history of psychiatric problems, and I'm beginning to think that they are resurfacing right now - I wonder if he's on the brink of losing it. I almost wonder if his mother is losing it too.
Ugh....things just keep getting worse.
How do you know the overnight "went very well" ? Do you believe what this guy is telling you? It's quite obvious that either your X or his mom sent that email. Who else even knows about CPS being involved? Whether or not the caseworker thinks it's ridiculous, it doesn't look great for court mama.
The thing is, you knowing that your X has a pyschiatric history and then allowing him unsupervised visitation, well, you're almost shooting yourself in the foot. As a PP said, you don't have to be a martyr or the nice guy in all of this. It is NOT up to you to make sure that everyone's feelings are protected. It IS up to you to look out for the well being of your son.
I know that this is all new and overwhelming for you. But please, PLEASE listen to those of us that have dealt with abusive X's and the system. Let the court decide custody and protect yourself and your son. You are well within your rights to say NO to overnight visits. Blame it on your lawyer! Tell him that your lawyer advised you to stop overnights until you get a court decision.
With this latest CPS allegation, I'd not even allow visits without me present but YMMV. From your posts I see you as a mom who has been through some tough times but clearly loves her little boy and wants the very best for him. You seem willing to bend over backwards to accomodate all parties.
OTOH, I see your X as also loving his son BUT also wanting to jerk you around in this process. NOT GOOD mama. That is not what is best for your baby and that is really selfish of him. Whatever issue between 2 parents, they should put that stuff aside and work it out for the child.
Ok, enough preachin' and ramblin'. Please take care and look out for yourself!