4 year old and preschooling

[StormySar]

Would you expect a 4 year old to remember letters and numbers and be able to identify them in some way?

What about holding a pen - should he be holding it correctly from the start and if so, how can I avoid his feelings of inadequacy when I'd have to show him again and again how to hold the pen? It got to the point that he'd become very upset every time hee'd go to write when I show him how to properly hold the pen, I figured I'd just let him use it on his own however is most comfortable... But however is most comfortable or seems most natural for him involves his arm being in the air and his hand being nearly upside down with his thumb closest to the table instead of his pinky. This is interfering with the quality of work (circling, drawing) he can show... What to do?

What are some fun, active ways to teach basic preschool skills? He learns best while being active. We've driven his trucks across the room to pick up and load blocks of certain quantity, colors and patterns, we began matching blocks with the same letters and loading them on his truck as well as driving his cars from one letter or number to another... But it doesn't seem as though much of this is "sticking." So I'm wondering how much of this should be retained. My daughter pretty much caught on by the time she was 4, but I know all kids are ready at different times, and boys mature later than girls. Just wondering how your 4 year old boys were like.

[cappuccinosmom]

My son is a "learn by doing" kid. If I can keep him in the same room as me for his 15 minutes of "official" school, I consider that a job well done. We do a lot of his daily lesson on the run, not in a at-the-desk-doing-school way, but included in conversation, story time, singing, etc.

Is he initiating writing himself, or is it part of something you've set up for him? If he's not really interested in writing, I'd drop it and let his motor skills have a chance to catch up. It's amazing the difference a matter of 2-3 months made for mine. He went from unrecognizeable half-hearted scribbles to decent stick figures and recognizeable shapes in just those few weeks. But he needed some extra time for both motor skills and motivation to catch up with his head-knowledge. I always have him start out with the proper way to hold things. Oh, and it is a *huge* help for little ones to have "fat" pencils and markers. Much easier to grip the right way.

My three boys all had some letter recognition starting at 2. They all learn differently though. The oldest and youngest are almost compulsive about things being orderly, and about figuring out their world. My middle kid marches to his own drummer and he *can* retain information, and does, but most of the time he just has many more important things to think about than "wasting time" (as he says) telling me what sound "A" makes when he knows I already know that. You might have some luck with sites like starfall.com. That definitely upped my son's interest in all things alphabet, though he'd never admit it.

[Dabble]

I know you know that every child develops at his/her own pace, but what I want to stress is that even if it may seem that the info isn't sticking with him, he is likely learning it in his own way. Even if he can't parrot the information back to you when asked, bits and pieces are likely taking hold with him, and his recall will improve as they gain footing.

We did a super fun craft alphabet each week (I also have daycare kids, so it was a group thing), where we would craft our letter of the week into something starting with that letter (i.e. A is for Alien, B is for Bear, etc). Most of our projects were simply construction paper and embellishments, and the rest of our activities that week would reinforce the letter. We got many of our ideas from this lovely site: http://www.notimeforflashcards.com/l...week/uppercase She gives great suggestions for books you can get at the library to go along with your theme. The kids had a lot of fun with it.

I also wouldn't worry too much about his pencil hold at this point, although triangular crayons and markers can often improve it pretty naturally just by making it a bit uncomfortable to hold it any other way. Certainly don't continue pestering him about it, or he is likely to get frustrated and quit trying. There are also pencil grips that you can purchase to encourage proper grip, but I wouldn't worry about that until he is school age. Just know that he isn't going to be taking his SAT's holding the pencil like that!

[Shianne]

Every child is different and on their own time table. Some will remember and some wont.
My 4 year old does not hold a pencil correctly either. I just let him be. I know that he will get it in time just as my two others have when they were ready.
Each of my boys learned at different times. One was interested in letters and numbers quite early and the other wasn't interested til much later. My youngest, at 4, just bounces around.
At 4 I would not be doing any type of bookwork or writing work unless he initiated it. I wouldn't correct his way of holding a pen or pencil unless he asked me if there was a better way.
My son learned his colours by eating popsicles. He learned his numbers through board games and card games. He learned his letters by reading along with me, playing with playdough and shaping letters, and he would see words and would want me to say each letter or have me spell words.

[Lillian J]

Children today are expected to know a certain amount by the time they enter school, but a child who is going to homeschool really doesn't need to start learning that kind of thing so young at all. If it hasn't come easy to him, so be it - he has lots and lots of time to learn it much later when there's some real reason to. It used to be that generations of children would start learning all that in 1st grade! Not even kindergarten, but 1st grade! That would be age 6. Here's an article by a well known, award winning kindergarten and nursery school teacher of 37 years who has written 11 books - Big "A", Little "a". And your child is only 4. I'd just forget about it all until he's a lot older - he'll be able to pick it up a lot faster and easier at a later age. And in answer to your original question, "Would you expect a 4 year old to remember letters and numbers and be able to identify them in some way?", no - mine didn't have to deal with learning all that till he was almost 7, and then only because he was about to go into a little school where all the 1st graders he'd be with had learned to read three letter words by the end of kindergarten. He would have been miserable if anyone had tried to pump that into him earlier. Lillian

[dantesmama]

My 4yo boy knows letters, basic phonics, and most of his numbers. He *just* started to hold a pencil correctly - I had given up trying to teach him to hold it the "right" way and he eventually figured it out for himself.

I wouldn't worry about doing anything in particular to teach him these skills - he'll just catch on when he's ready and interested. 4yo boys are so busy doing other stuff anyway!

[LuxPerpetua]

Originally Posted by StormySar

Would you expect a 4 year old to remember letters and numbers and be able to identify them in some way?

What about holding a pen - should he be holding it correctly from the start and if so, how can I avoid his feelings of inadequacy when I'd have to show him again and again how to hold the pen? It got to the point that he'd become very upset every time hee'd go to write when I show him how to properly hold the pen, I figured I'd just let him use it on his own however is most comfortable... But however is most comfortable or seems most natural for him involves his arm being in the air and his hand being nearly upside down with his thumb closest to the table instead of his pinky. This is interfering with the quality of work (circling, drawing) he can show... What to do?

What are some fun, active ways to teach basic preschool skills? He learns best while being active. We've driven his trucks across the room to pick up and load blocks of certain quantity, colors and patterns, we began matching blocks with the same letters and loading them on his truck as well as driving his cars from one letter or number to another... But it doesn't seem as though much of this is "sticking." So I'm wondering how much of this should be retained. My daughter pretty much caught on by the time she was 4, but I know all kids are ready at different times, and boys mature later than girls. Just wondering how your 4 year old boys were like.

If my child wasn't interested in these things, then, no, I wouldn't worry about it a bit. I have a nearly 4 yo myself and she does know her letters and numbers but not because I have taught her. We just read A LOT and she became very interested in letters in books and on signs outside and such at a very young age. She can rote count quite high but that's because she loves memorizing sequences of things (she also knows hundreds of songs and many poems). She can identify numbers up to 12 because of our clock. Again, just interest. We are Waldorf so you know I haven't been actively focusing on any of this. I'm sure your child is learning so many other things besides these that I think the best thing to do is just to relax and enjoy.