One year old waking every 1-2 hours entire night + nap question

[SpunkyMama]

Hello Everyone,

My son, Avery, turned one a week ago. Ever since he has been born he has woken every 1-2 hours to nurse. This is what a typical night for us looks like:

Bedtime routine: 6:30
Sleep around 7:30-8:00
Begin nightwaking to nurse 9:00-5:00 about every hour and a half or so
DH takes DS for a couple of hours in the middle of the night so I can get sleep
Wake: 5:30-6:00

We bed-share, and I nurse him every time he wakes up (or try to anyways). There are many nights (at least half to three-quarters) that my husband takes him for an hour or two so I can try to get some uninterrupted sleep. When DH takes him it involves putting him in a baby carrier and bouncing on an exercise ball the entire time, which is very tiring for DH.

I could handle him waking a couple of times to nurse. I am not interested in night weaning because he is so young yet. I am looking for advice on how to help him sleep for longer stretches at a time. I don't even necessarily want him to STTN - just be asleep for longer stretches.

This is what we have tried so far:

100% cotton pajamas
100% organic bed and bedding
I tank him up ALL DAY and especially during his night routine!!
Having DH sleep in between us
Moving DS away from me when he is done nursing (which usually ends up waking him up and him screaming)
We keep the room fairly cool (I can't sleep if it is too warm and it seems like DS has the same issue)
We are gluten, dairy, and soy free
I try to comfort him in other ways by patting his chest, shhing him, talking gently, etc
I pull him closer or push him further away

I talked to our pedi (who is supportive of bedsharing), and she said it sounds behavioral at this point. I have thought about teething, walking, etc. This has been going for about 3 months now.

DS also wakes up screaming! He has never transitioned well from awake to asleep or vice versa. If he catches me in a bad part of my sleep cycle I can be a bear which doesn't help anyone! Do any of your HN kids cry/scream upon waking?

DS will only sleep for his naps on me in a baby carrier. I have tried to get him down for naps by laying him in bed, slinging him down and then laying him down, etc. If he is awake he just crawls around and wants to play. If I wrap him down and transfer him to the bed he screams (even when he has reached limp limb). Any ideas on transitioning him out of the baby carrier for naps? He usually takes two naps a day totaling about 2-2.5 hours. He wakes around 6, has his first nap 8-9 and his second nap around 1-2:30.

Any tips, suggestions, ideas would be greatly appreciated. I just don't know what else to try!!

TIA,

~Kristin

[Ruthla]

I wonder if there's another food or environmental sensitivity or allergy. You're dairy, soy, and gluten free, but he might have a problem with eggs, or corn (which is everywhere in GF stuff!) or some other food. It could be a reaction to something via your milk, or it might be something he's been eating directly that his little system just isnt' ready for.

Kids can also react to food addtives, or chemical fragrances from household cleaners, but it sounds like you've already eliminated those.

[SpunkyMama]

I rarely eat eggs. I will check into the corn thing. We follow a 100% whole foods, organic diet.

We don't use any household cleaners besides vinegar, eo's, baking soda etc...

Thanks for responding!

[LadyCatherine185]

My DS has always been a frequent night-waker as well. I've tried everything and nothing has worked to get him to sleep longer stretches..

Some things that have seemed to help a little are getting lots of fresh air and active play during the day, and keeping it very dark in the room with white noise.

[MommyDOK]

My son is a month older than your baby and he is on a similar schedule. He will nap alone, but I'm so freaking tired from the night-waking that I sleep w/ him most days.

My first dc used to wake up screaming. I think it was just a tough transition for her. She was never left to cry or anything, so I don't know why it was a tough transition, but she ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS wanted to nurse upon waking. My next two babies hardly ever nursed upon waking.

I've never thought it was food allergies or anything....it's just what my babies have mostly done, although my first sttn at 15 months. I've tried to give this one to my dh for a few hours and sometimes he will do it, and sometimes he just won't go. I think he's teething. A few weeks ago, he went to dh for 5 hours!!!

Your dh is awesome to give you that break!

[Picard]

Maybe Avery needs to go to the washroom at night? I have found that if I bring DS to the washroom, he sleeps better. Some kids just don't like to soil their diapers or sleep in wet diapers. Other than that, my DS has gone through phases of waking up that frequently when he was teething.

[SpunkyMama]

We ec during the day, and we have tried ec'ing at night from time to time. Usually Avery just screams. I think we should start trying it again though. He definitely doesn't like being in dirty diapers!! Thanks, Picard.

[eshallow]

I can only sympathize- offer no advice. My DD (11 months) has been waking every 40 minutes-1 hour ever night all night for basically her whole life (though in the beginning she would give a long stretch at the first part of the night- that ended around 4 months). She has finally learned to sleep on her own for naps but nighttime is tough sometimes with the constant waking and all night nursing. I feel for you mamma. Sometimes knowing other mammas are out there nursing and awake all night helps.
BTW- my DD has always often woken up screaming too- even when she was little and I had to hold her for all her naps. cuddled in my arms- even on the boob- she would still wake up crying- and in a state for a while. sad. always wondered.

[VeganCupcake]

My 14 month old DD is like this, too--wakes frequently at night, and always screaming. I think it's very much related to her personality. She's very intense, so when she wakes at night and is still tired, she is very upset--even when I'm right there, snuggling with her.

We've done an elimination diet, and still avoid some foods. We have tried cal/mag supplements for both me and baby. Our house is fairly chemical-free. I think it's just something some little ones do and will eventually grow out of.

I have been considering partial nightweaning for a few hours at night. But I've been considering it a long time and not really doing anything about it. I don't know if that would be confusing for a toddler or not, or even possible.

I wish I had some good suggestions for you. But know that in the middle of the night, many of us are in the same situation.

[blizzard_babe]

Originally Posted by VeganCupcake

My 14 month old DD is like this, too--wakes frequently at night, and always screaming. I think it's very much related to her personality. She's very intense, so when she wakes at night and is still tired, she is very upset--even when I'm right there, snuggling with her.

This is my DS (18mos) also. He's growing out of it a bit... sometimes now he'll wake up, cry a few pathetic cries, and be sound asleep by the time I get to him (we moved him into his own room when we discovered by accident that he sleeps much better without us )... like 30 seconds since his room is right across the hall. It has taken a while. He used to wake up and clearly be MISERABLE, but unable to fall back asleep.

Come to think of it, I think he gets it from me.

[TiredX2]

For me, that was totally normal with both kids. They both only napped while being held (or in the car). DD was giving her last nap up around that time, while DS was still taking one nap a day.

Is it common for a one year old to still be taking two naps a day?

No real advice, just BTDT. We ended up partially night weaning DD at 25 months (for one 4-5 hour segment). DS did not go 4-5 hours until he was over 4. But they also did not sleep that long at night (DD was going 9-10 hours at night at that age, but she did go up to 11-12 when we had mono ).

Good luck Are you napping WITH him to get a bit more sleep?

[SpunkyMama]

Originally Posted by TiredX2

Are you napping WITH him to get a bit more sleep?

I wish!! Avery only naps in a wrap with me bouncing on an exercise ball. I have tried off and on to have him nap in the bed, and it always results in both of us bawling!

We actually just moved Avery's bedtime back an hour (he is now asleep by 7/7:15), and he is waking only about 4x to nurse. This is a significant improvement from the 10x a week ago!

Thanks for all the support mamas! It is nice to know I am not alone in this

[quantumleap]

We are in the same situation. I actually posted a question on here about partial night weaning. I hope dd will understand what we are doing! Anyway, we've started a modified version of Dr. Jay Gordon's nightweaning program. I just want from midnight to 5am! Last night, the first night, actually went fairly well. You're supposed to do three days at each stage, but I think we might lengthen that out a bit if I feel dd needs more time.
Anyway, I just wanted to add that white noise has been great for us. DD sometimes skips the 40minutes in to the night wake up, and often makes it from 7h30 or 8h until 10h30 or 11h these days. Crazy what you count as sucess, hey?
Also, our dd was very similar with the napping - she had to be on my chest in a quiet place and any bit of stirring on her part meant we had to gently bounce until she settled again.
We got a Kanoe. (www.kanoe.us) Naptime is much, much better now. I still nurse her and cuddle her for a few minutes, and then I put her in the kanoe and bounce/rock it a bit, and we're golden. Usually. We did put a sheepskin in the kanoe to ease the transition from Mama's warm arms to a cool piece of canvas. Seems to work.
I keep telling myself that when kids are 18, they don't typically need their moms to come rock them and cuddle them all night. There's an end point to this all night parenting gig.

[SpunkyMama]

selkat, how old is your dd?

[quantumleap]

Sorry, should have mentioned that part! She's three weeks short of a year.

[SpunkyMama]

I have looked at those in the past. DS is already 25 lbs, and I wonder how much use we will be able to get out of it. About how long did it take to transition her out of the sling and into the Kanoe? I also really like the Happy HAngup! http://www.happyhangup.com/. It is just so pretty!

DS usually takes at least 1 hour naps on me. I have noticed in the rare times he has fallen asleep at the breast in bed that he only naps half an hour. Have you noticed if you DD naps for shorter or longer times?