I'm looking for words of wisdom, advice or just gut reactions...
I intended to have a UC.
I nearly had this.
I labored for 17 hours and reached 9cm on my own.
At this point I began to feel different than I had with my previous two labors, an different than I did earlier in this labor.
The contractions, though not stronger, were more painful. I was having a harder time with them because of their sharpness. Mostly though I was noticing that as the contraction would end and I would normally have been feeling high coming through it I was feeling momentarily like I was going to faint.
I had the distinct feeling that something was not right.
I had DH call the local midwives and request that they come and assess.
I also had the feeling that I could deliver this baby before they arrived if only I could find the energy to get out of the pool and squat and walk a little. I just couldn't find the energy though.
MW arrived about 30 minutes later. To my dismay, there were four of them. Too many people
They checked me out, checked heart tones, found everything to be good, but suspected clinical exhaustion/severe dehydration. Urinalysis confirmed extremely low keytones and dehydration. yeah, I blew that one.
They wanted to start an IV, I wanted to try to eat/drink. They gave me the space to do this, but I was so tired I couldn't seem to get enough down and finally consented to the IV after about an hour of not being able to replenish energy and worrying that I wouldn't have the energy to push.
About 5 minutes after the IV was in I returned to the tub. Before I could get all the way down onto my knees my water broke with a huge pushing contraction. She was born into my hands 3 pushes, and about 5 minutes, later. The IV came out when I changed positions to catch her.
We nursed in the pool and the MW began to want the placenta to deliver, but I wasn't really getting any contractions that I felt like I could push with.
After a while they asked me to get out of the pool to try to squat and push it out. Same problem... no pushing contractions. After awhile the told me that we had passed their 1 hour time limit for placenta delivery and wanted to do an internal exam to see where it was.
MW said something about it being "right there" and "mushroomed" and I was instructed to push as she manually removed the placenta. It was hard and unpleasant and there was more blood than I recalled having with previous birth. They had to change out chux pads more than once.
I moved to bed to nurse and rest with my new baby girl. They came in to do a NB exam and check my uterus and bleeding level. At this point they found my uterus to be "boggy" and not contracting. They asked if I could stand up to pee in a bucket and see if perhaps my full bladder was causing the trouble. I stood up and passed about 1000ml blood into the bucket instead. This made abou 1200ml blood with what came after the placenta.
At this point everything seemed to go crazy. I received a shot of Pitocin... no result. Two shots of "meth?". Still bleeding and not contracting.
911 was called at this point as they tried to start another IV and massaged my uterus.
Bleeding slowed but continued and my uterus still would not stay firm on it's own.
EMS arrived, established an IV and began transfer to the ER.
In the truck my BP and pulse remained good, Pitocin was added to my IV and bleeding stopped and my uterus remained firm.
At the hospital I bypassed the ER and was admitted to L & D with my babe and DH for sleep and observation.
Blood panel was good and the doctor told me I could go home when I finished the IV bag. Dehydration was the determined cause of hemorrhage.
So here's what I get:
I got my uninterrupted labor, mostly.
I got to catch her myself, while trying to ignore their instructions on when to push, etc.
Didn't get to check for the cord on her neck myself.
Got time with my babe before we were separated for about an hour during the ordeal.
Got her back within an hour, we were home within a few hours, and everything seems great.
I'm processing it well, I think. I'm deeply disappointed about not UCing.
I'm upset that I failed to stay even acceptably hydrated. There were too many factors: new to extremely high elevation, two fireplaces going as our heat source, and a first time with waterbirth.
I'm working through how I might have manifested this and why. I'm also working through some questions about what happened. I'm so grateful for the MW showing up when I called them despite my dissing their protocol when we met at the beginning of pregnancy. I'm grateful for them doing what they believed was best and really trying to still give me what I had wanted. My questions are this:
In the UC community it isn't uncommon for the placenta to take several hours to deliver. My question is whether I would have hemorrhaged if I had simply left the placenta in place, gotten some sleep, food and water and delivered it when it came on it's own. I am ignorant on this topic other than a deep faith in the natural order of things and my own wonder about why my placenta would have stayed in... I don't believe my body is broken and I don't understand the 1hr delivery protocol. I don't blame the MW, but I am blaming myself a little.
I question whether calling the MW was a lifesaving decision or something that could have been safely avoided.
I guess I will never know, but this is what I am working through.
I'm grateful for having labored to 9cm alone and for being able to catch her myself. I am mourning the birth-high that was pushed out by the placenta removal and the hospital transfer.
Advice? Words of wisdom? Gut feelings?
xo
Thanks for reading.
I intended to have a UC.
I nearly had this.
I labored for 17 hours and reached 9cm on my own.
At this point I began to feel different than I had with my previous two labors, an different than I did earlier in this labor.
The contractions, though not stronger, were more painful. I was having a harder time with them because of their sharpness. Mostly though I was noticing that as the contraction would end and I would normally have been feeling high coming through it I was feeling momentarily like I was going to faint.
I had the distinct feeling that something was not right.
I had DH call the local midwives and request that they come and assess.
I also had the feeling that I could deliver this baby before they arrived if only I could find the energy to get out of the pool and squat and walk a little. I just couldn't find the energy though.
MW arrived about 30 minutes later. To my dismay, there were four of them. Too many people
They checked me out, checked heart tones, found everything to be good, but suspected clinical exhaustion/severe dehydration. Urinalysis confirmed extremely low keytones and dehydration.
yeah, I blew that one.They wanted to start an IV, I wanted to try to eat/drink. They gave me the space to do this, but I was so tired I couldn't seem to get enough down and finally consented to the IV after about an hour of not being able to replenish energy and worrying that I wouldn't have the energy to push.
About 5 minutes after the IV was in I returned to the tub. Before I could get all the way down onto my knees my water broke with a huge pushing contraction. She was born into my hands 3 pushes, and about 5 minutes, later. The IV came out when I changed positions to catch her.
We nursed in the pool and the MW began to want the placenta to deliver, but I wasn't really getting any contractions that I felt like I could push with.
After a while they asked me to get out of the pool to try to squat and push it out. Same problem... no pushing contractions. After awhile the told me that we had passed their 1 hour time limit for placenta delivery and wanted to do an internal exam to see where it was.
MW said something about it being "right there" and "mushroomed" and I was instructed to push as she manually removed the placenta. It was hard and unpleasant and there was more blood than I recalled having with previous birth. They had to change out chux pads more than once.
I moved to bed to nurse and rest with my new baby girl. They came in to do a NB exam and check my uterus and bleeding level. At this point they found my uterus to be "boggy" and not contracting. They asked if I could stand up to pee in a bucket and see if perhaps my full bladder was causing the trouble. I stood up and passed about 1000ml blood into the bucket instead. This made abou 1200ml blood with what came after the placenta.
At this point everything seemed to go crazy. I received a shot of Pitocin... no result. Two shots of "meth?". Still bleeding and not contracting.
911 was called at this point as they tried to start another IV and massaged my uterus.
Bleeding slowed but continued and my uterus still would not stay firm on it's own.
EMS arrived, established an IV and began transfer to the ER.
In the truck my BP and pulse remained good, Pitocin was added to my IV and bleeding stopped and my uterus remained firm.
At the hospital I bypassed the ER and was admitted to L & D with my babe and DH for sleep and observation.
Blood panel was good and the doctor told me I could go home when I finished the IV bag. Dehydration was the determined cause of hemorrhage.
So here's what I get:
I got my uninterrupted labor, mostly.
I got to catch her myself, while trying to ignore their instructions on when to push, etc.
Didn't get to check for the cord on her neck myself.
Got time with my babe before we were separated for about an hour during the ordeal.
Got her back within an hour, we were home within a few hours, and everything seems great.
I'm processing it well, I think. I'm deeply disappointed about not UCing.
I'm upset that I failed to stay even acceptably hydrated. There were too many factors: new to extremely high elevation, two fireplaces going as our heat source, and a first time with waterbirth.
I'm working through how I might have manifested this and why. I'm also working through some questions about what happened. I'm so grateful for the MW showing up when I called them despite my dissing their protocol when we met at the beginning of pregnancy. I'm grateful for them doing what they believed was best and really trying to still give me what I had wanted. My questions are this:
In the UC community it isn't uncommon for the placenta to take several hours to deliver. My question is whether I would have hemorrhaged if I had simply left the placenta in place, gotten some sleep, food and water and delivered it when it came on it's own. I am ignorant on this topic other than a deep faith in the natural order of things and my own wonder about why my placenta would have stayed in... I don't believe my body is broken and I don't understand the 1hr delivery protocol. I don't blame the MW, but I am blaming myself a little.
I question whether calling the MW was a lifesaving decision or something that could have been safely avoided.
I guess I will never know, but this is what I am working through.
I'm grateful for having labored to 9cm alone and for being able to catch her myself. I am mourning the birth-high that was pushed out by the placenta removal and the hospital transfer.
Advice? Words of wisdom? Gut feelings?
xo
Thanks for reading.
I remember how horrible it is revisiting a birth in your mind over and over again and just wondering what happened. Two of mine led me to do that, and it was really difficult.
Enjoy your babymoon, and hope you have your complete UC someday if you like...
