Toddler Bedtime Disaster!

[Aliyahsmommy]

My two year old daughter has regressed from sleeping in her own bed and through the night in the last 3 months or so. Our old routine was letting her fall asleep in our bed and then moving her to her bed and that was working just fine though it did mean she went to bed a little later than I might have liked. In the last month or two it has gotten especially bad because she wakes up when we try to move her to her bed and screams/cries and so we have been unable to move her. Then even if we did get her moved she would wake up in the middle of the night and venture into our room...problem with this is she is a very crazy sleeper and keeps me up all night. Not to mention she would insist on being tickled for an endless amount of time and throw a huge tantrum at 3am if I declined to do so.
With new baby coming in a couple days I know we need to change the bedtime routine, but I'm not really sure how. We started three nights ago with bathtime, storytime, and then I would lay next to her bed and offer to hold her hand. I would not respond to endless requests for snacks, cuddling, tickling etc. The first night it took an hour, the second night it took 45 minutes...last night was a complete disaster. She cried for an hour even with me next to her asking for all sorts of things and even claiming her blanket was hurting her etc. I was so tired myself that I got frustrated and ended up yelling and leaving the room with her screaming for a minute. Anyways we did finally get her to sleep, but it took two hours! And all three of these nights she still ended up in our bed in the middle of the night...I can't imagine trying to re-start the bedtime routine at 3am and am at a loss as to what to do.
I feel like there are two sides of the spectrum. Side one is just laying with her and co-sleeping and cuddling and doing whatever she needs. By doing so I am giving up my needs completely and that makes me almost resentful. The other side is to lock her in her room and let her CIO, which we could never do. What does everyone in the middle do though to get their kids to sleep in their own bed????

[Encinalien]

I have to get up most nights to run back and forth between ds bed and dh bed. Dh keeps teasing me about "running off to sleep with another guy". I have always co-slept with ds, who can not sleep with dh because ds moves too much and keeps dh awake. I can't imagine doing this pregnant, which already makes you tired.

I've noticed that if ds is awake he wants some kind of light on somewhere, but if I shut off all the lights after he's asleep so it's completely and utterly dark he's a lot less likely to wake up before morning. Obviously keep the thermostat set comfortably. Wake them up in the morning.

I put ds to sleep. Go cuddle with dh. Most the time I can't really get to sleep because I'm waiting for my "baby alarm" to go off between 1-3am telling me to move back to the other bed. Sometime I wish I could just sleep on the couch and tell them both to get over it. I spoil them too much. We try to spoil each other.