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Traditional Catholic Mamas -Winter 2010 - Page 5

post #81 of 208
Quote:
Originally Posted by xekomaya View Post
Please EVERYONE, keep in mind we're in a SUPPORT ONLY thread and cannot debate this. We need to show charity all around. If this is a topic anyone wants to really get into, it can always be moved to RS.
Thanks for the reminder I'm happy to expound more on my issues with Popcak in another thread, if anyone is interested.
post #82 of 208
I was never interested in debating, I'm sorry if my post 'broke a rule'. I don't know the history in this thread. I was only commenting on the asserted link between child spacing, preferred age gaps and AP.
post #83 of 208
There is nothing sinful about, lets say 10 kids in 10 years. Neglecting them, however, is another matter, and that is where I was coming from. Some parents can handle just about anything, some next to nothing.

Thanks for the reminder. TBH, I guess I really don't know what these threads are and are not for.
post #84 of 208
Hello, just popping in at 3 a.m. to say I can't sleep!! I'm seven months pregnant and seem to be getting this here and there. Such a bummer!
post #85 of 208
Hey moonshoes!
post #86 of 208
subbing. Sorry I have not been on MDC for a while. My DH has been off since the 23rd of Dec, so we did lots of family stuff and fun Advent/Christmas activities. He goes back to work Monday and I will definitely miss him.

Our youngest is now 4 months old and we are enjoying his babyhood.
Tomorrow we have Mass at 10am and then the Rosary later in the day.

Take care all!!

Jen
post #87 of 208
Hello! It's been awhile since i have been on. Our Christmas was nice, although we have resolved that next year we will not be doing the whole present-thing. MAYBE one small gift for the kids, but that's all. I'm sick of the materialism that has taken over the celebration of Christ's birth, and I would be a hypocrit to say that and still partcipate in it.

moonshoes: s I have rough pregnancies too. I try to offer them up for prayer intentions but, man, does it get hard!

I came across the transcript of a sermon given by St. Leonard of Port Maurice, and I thought I would share and see if anyone had any thoughts on what he says. It's kind of long, but I found it to be a great read. It's definitley got me thinking about my life and my priorities. Here is the link: http://www.olrl.org/snt_docs/fewness.shtml

DS is crying so I gotta run. Poor guy isn't feeling well, I don't think. So much sickness going around these days... it's kind of strange.

God Bless!
post #88 of 208
Morning everyone!

I just wanted to tell everyone that DD and I are doing well.
I am struggling with internal things, but some things seem to be getting better. I am working on carving out quiet time with God. I picked up a copy of Magnificat and am enjoying my time in prayer.

I hope everyone is doing well, and I keep you all in my prayers.
post #89 of 208
Corrie - we give our children each 3 gifts since Jesus received 3 gifts. We started this tradition when they were small and it is nice. I also did a lot of Advent teaching with them this year. We did Jesse tree ornaments and did some of the activities on the Holy Heroes site. It was a lot of fun for everyone.

For next year I am thinking of getting a set of the three gifts Jesus received for our nativity set.

Jen
post #90 of 208
Quote:
Originally Posted by CherryBomb View Post
A note about Popcak,

Well that's interesting! I've have heard this 3yr space mentioned a lot in my psychology circles. I have a psychology friend right now who is doing the 'non congratulations' to my pregnancy by ignoring it. She's really big on the 3yr space. I wonder if there's some new research or trend driving this idea? I mean, the reasons make sense, nothing wrong with it perse. It's just the implication that takes a wrong turn...the idea that less than 3yrs automatically means the parents can't attach to their child.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Anumaria View Post
I hope I don't hurt anyone's feelings here... I found Popcak's writing very true.

However... I come to this from a strange place: We have been suffering from secondary infertility since having had our only dc, while belonging to a parish that has been influenced by a group that does not "believe" in nfp. I see a lot of very bad parenting around us. It is indeed impossible to AP if you have a child every single year, for, let's say 8 years in a row. I see kids whose diapers are not changed after they go #2, infants who are left home with a sitter for the weekends while the parents go on a retreat ONCE A MONTH, toddlers being left to sit in strollers for 30 mins or more, alone, in hot winter clothes, while parents socialize after mass in another room.

So... This is a really difficult topic to me... I want to go shake these parents (and especially the priests who guide them)... and found myself not able to say or do anything.

I am never going to understand not taking care of the kids God has given you.
Hi there, no hurt feelings at all but I think you should keep in mind that parenting is an individually-based behavior, regardless of the person's circumstances. You seem to think that b/c they practice NFP, they therefore are stuck with kids closer together? That is another assumption to work through.

I come from a family of 12 kids, one in heaven. You might be interested to know that my mom has done 8 unassisted births, delayed cord clamping, delayed solids, child led weaning, EC, cloth diapering, baby wearing, whole foods/vegan diets, homeschooling etc.

Disposables were for long car trips and strollers were for trips to the mall. Otherwise my mom was and is the most AP mama I know IRL. She has 2 sets of kids 1yr apart, one set of kids 3yrs apart and the rest are 2ish apart. Spacing can impact resources and energy, but it doesn't automatically force parents to sacrifice a relationship with their children.
post #91 of 208
Hey Teffer! I left for quite awhile also, don't know if it was for the exact same reasons, but "climate of the board" seems to fit Sorry to Ardiunna left, I was just wondering about her (she was pretty new in the process of coming to the Church when I left). Anyway, nice to see you, and congrats on the new baby! I've gotten my period back at 12 weeks pp with each baby (and I'm a LLL Leader; I KNOW how to use ecological breastfeeding for child spacing!!) The only reason there's 4 years between my first two is because I was a birth control using atheist

ITA with you about discipline, too. You're spot on, parents are the first understand of God that children get.
Quote:
It's just the implication that takes a wrong turn...the idea that less than 3yrs automatically means the parents can't attach to their child.
Yes, exactly That and the insistence that such a belief is taught by the Church, and his disingenuousness of hiding behind the Church when he's challenged, really bothers me. The Church does NOT teach we MUST space children 3 years apart; that's one man's interpretation of the Church's teaching on responsible parenthood. Responsible parenthood looks different for every family, just as openness to life and generosity of fertility looks different for every family.
post #92 of 208
Quote:
Originally Posted by CherryBomb View Post
Hey Teffer! I left for quite awhile also, don't know if it was for the exact same reasons, but "climate of the board" seems to fit Sorry to Ardiunna left, I was just wondering about her (she was pretty new in the process of coming to the Church when I left). Anyway, nice to see you, and congrats on the new baby! I've gotten my period back at 12 weeks pp with each baby (and I'm a LLL Leader; I KNOW how to use ecological breastfeeding for child spacing!!) The only reason there's 4 years between my first two is because I was a birth control using atheist

ITA with you about discipline, too. You're spot on, parents are the first understand of God that children get.


Yes, exactly That and the insistence that such a belief is taught by the Church, and his disingenuousness of hiding behind the Church when he's challenged, really bothers me. The Church does NOT teach we MUST space children 3 years apart; that's one man's interpretation of the Church's teaching on responsible parenthood. Responsible parenthood looks different for every family, just as openness to life and generosity of fertility looks different for every family.
I got my period back at 3mo too!

It's really worrying to hear that Popcak is promoting this as a Church teaching. I read a few of his books and really liked them. I guess I'll just be wary of generally plugging him.
post #93 of 208
Hey Teffer! Good to see you again! I still pray for you and for all the issues surrounding when you left. Congrats on the pregnancy. Ecological breastfeeding is a wonderful thing, and God's timing is even better. My own LO is just over 9 months now, and we're doing ecological breastfeeding too. DD still nurses all the time and has been really reluctant to rely on solids for much of her nurtrition at all. I have been struggling with a fear of getting pregnant and not having enough milk for her before she's ready to rely on solids for food. Even before I got pregnant, fertility signs were difficult to chart, and a lot of times, we relied on temp only. God has been building in me a sense of trust that he will not send me another baby until the baby I already have can handle it. With this trust, I will be able to rejoice with a new pregnancy whenever it happens.
post #94 of 208
Quote:
Originally Posted by TefferTWH View Post
BTW, has anyone here gotten the boycott list from LDI? Some changes coming in my household this week about where our money goes for sure.
Yeah, we've been getting it for a couple years now. I think we've paid for 1 movie sense. I'm so glad UPS is back off the list already (in case you didn't sign up for their e-mail list). It was a pain making sure that none of our Christmas gifts got shipped by UPS. Then somebody did actually do a free "upgrade" for us and not tell us.
post #95 of 208
Can someone send me this boycott list? I am not very up to date on boycotting.
post #96 of 208
Same here
post #97 of 208

I need some advise

Good Morning. My heart is heavy this morning and I don't know what to do. My DH is a wonderful man. I mean that from the bottom of my heart. But, I am soooo mad at him. (This is VERY rare). It's about Church and that is why I am here.....I am quickly trying to type this with the kids running around, cooking, and laundry all at the same time so it may sound rather rushed and harsh please, understand.

We are both Catholic by default because of the area we were born and raised. Neither of our parents really brought us to church. They made sure we did our first communions and that was about it. My extended family is much more " religious"....I had 3 great uncles that were priests, paternal grandparents were DEVOUT, along with another aunt and her family. So, I had role models. I fell away from the church and started coming back about 10 years ago. I got an annulment from my 1st marriage. Met and civilly married DH. He went through the annulment process too. (Not an easy or quick process...he did it because it was important to ME). We had our marriage validated in church last year on our 7th anniversary. Our children go to a very strict christian school....not Catholic but it is a bible school. He feels that this is in the best interest of our children. To instill a strong foundation.

I try hard to get us to go every Sunday but things do happen and I have really been striving for weekly attendance. We go to the 7AM mass because there are less chances of us skipping out because it frees up the rest of the day. Finally found a church that I like....like the priest's homilies and the building is an old cathedral style. ( very similar to the church I went to as a child). DH goes.....

So, why won't he participate in mass? He doesn't utter a prayer. He does the 'aerobics" but rests his butt on the pew when he kneels...HUGE pet peeve of mine....seriously, Jesus hung on a cross for us....don't you think you can show some respect????? He doesn't go to communion....I even offer to teach him again so that he would know what to do...he doesn't want to. DD#1 is starting to ask questions. WE ARE THE MOST IMPORTANT TEACHERS!!!! She was stressed out yesterday that his butt was on the pew because I pat them on the butts to kneel correctly. I tapped him and he rolled his eyes at me and didn't move. I desperately want to be a good and strong catholic family. I have prayed. I am still mad....we barely spoke yesterday. This is awful behavior on my part but I am hurt. Any advise??? Thanks.
post #98 of 208
Boycott list info: http://www.fightpp.org/ The list is constantly changing, so if you're going to do it, I recommend getting a partnership so that new lists get sent automatically. This is a very effective boycott/letter writing campaign. Most companies feel the heat and make the changes necessary to get off the list very shortly after they get on the list.
post #99 of 208
gothnurse, that sounds hard. I try to tell myself that it is between God and the individual. But then I know what you are feeling b/c kids watch like hawks. If your kids are past pre-school/kindy age they would probably benefit from learning that people need make an individual effort to build a relationship with God and that your DH is struggling. I'm not talking about putting him down, but rather about using this as an opportunity to share with them the 'dark night of the soul' that we are all bound to experience at some time or another. You could encourage them to be good examples and to pray for him to be open to God's grace.
post #100 of 208
Just wanted to let you ladies know that we had our baby yesterday, she is beautiful and healthy and we are just thrilled! Our NFP "lapse" is such a blessing.

Also, I am still occasionally in touch with Arduinna, we were seeking and learning about Catholicism at the same time and I do try to stay in touch with her even if it is irregular. if you want to contact her send me a PM.
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