Playful Parenting anecdotes

[Aletheia]

Hi-
I just checked out "Playful Parenting" by Leonard Cohen, and am really enjoying it thus far. It has me feeling really inspired! I especially am enjoying the anecdotes of playful ideas that have turned potential power plays and tantrums into successful and fun times.

I thought it might be useful to have a thread in which we can post our own anecdotes of how playful parenting has worked for us-- an easy way to stay inspired by this GD approach to power struggles!

Here's my first one:

Last night, DS1 began to pull his normal "I WILL NOT GET IN BED AND GO TO SLEEP" routine. He's 3. He's been a pistol lately. We are tired. We are tired of putting him back in his bed. I am tired of using more energy to keep myself from yelling and screaming at him than it would take to yell and scream at him, iykwim. So last night, when he got up out of bed, I filled up a hot water bottle with warm water, and went into his room. "Where is DS?" I asked. "He's not in his bed! DH, did you put him somewhere? I wanted to snuggle him into his bed and give him this nice cozy warm water bottle! But now I have no one to give it to!" I made a big deal of looking for him in strange places in the bedroom- dresser drawers, the lego box, etc., with DS quietly observing at first and then giggling uncontrollably after a little while. I went out to the living room to look, said, "well, he's not in here. you keep looking, DH, and I'll go back in the room and look some more." He was in bed, covers pulled up, eyes gleaming.

It was like magic. It was wonderful!

What did you do today that got your little one giggling instead of screaming?

Similar thread: http://www.mothering.com/discussions....php?t=1184098

[leahd]

If my ds starts to throw a tantrum a fling myself on the floor and join him(only at home). He seems so baffled that he forgets he was mad.

[Wild Lupine]

When DD didn't want to leave the playground today and ran away from me, I turned it into an 'I'm going to get you game.' Once I caught up with her I told her she was an airplane and 'flew' her to the car on my outstretched arms singing the Wiggles "Fly Through the Sky."

[OGirlieMama]

Tonight, my kids just wanted to play with their mermaid dolls instead of brushing their teeth before bed. I felt like crap (just came down with a UTI) and somehow instead of yelling and turning off the lights to get their attention, I asked their dolls to do the work for me. "Pink Ariel, can you ask Katie to let me brush her teeth?" The best part was that Katie said "I don't think they're dirty, can you check?" and then stuck Pink Ariel in her mouth to have a look around. Her teeth and her sister's teeth both got brushed this way, and I felt like a hero.

[Aletheia]

Originally Posted by leahd

If my ds starts to throw a tantrum a fling myself on the floor and join him(only at home). He seems so baffled that he forgets he was mad.

I love this one.

Welcome to MDC!

[major_mama11]

My DH is much better at Playful Parenting than I am, so here's one of his...

When DD is balking about going home from someone's house, refusing to put on her jacket, bracing for a standoff, he will make a big show of saying, "OK, I guess this jacket is for me to wear, then. Arrrghhh, how does this work..." and then he makes a big show of straining to fit his arms into her little sleeves.

Inevitably, she starts to giggle and grabs it from him and insists on putting it on all by herself.

[mrskingred]

If my ds starts to throw a tantrum a fling myself on the floor and join him(only at home). He seems so baffled that he forgets he was mad.

Yes, works great at home. Never been brave enough to try it in the supermarket as shown here
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xJpPUDMrAO0

[Shannie77]

DD 2.5 is not a fan of brushing her teeth. MIL got her a cinderella spin brush toothbrush and I have started making cinderella talk. DD loves it when I make her toys talk, and I can always get Cinderella to persuade her to cooperate.

[seashells]

DH is the master at our house. Just a few random anecdotes that come to mind:

Once DH was driving DD home in the car. I don't remember what the issue was, but she was getting near to meltdown wanting to be home already (maybe hungry). DH started mock yelling at the cars in front of him: "Hey! Green car! Go faster! We need to be home!" DD almost immediately joined in. They spent the rest of the ride yelling, which I'm sure also got a little old for DH after a few minutes, but it was way better than a meltdown.

Also, DH can sometimes encourage DD to eat something by pretending to be the food. "Aiiiii! Don't eat me!!!!!! I'm just an innocent chick pea!!!!!! HELLPPP!!" which makes her giggle and ruthlessly chomp on the poor chick pea.

[Shakti77]

My friend A is a natural at playful parenting....she taught me a few tricks this October. It was just after that time, I started reading Lawrence Cohen. I could easily relate to how that method works. Initially it was a bit awkward for me but with a bit of gentle hand-holding from my friend, I slowly eased into it.

Sometimes if DD's being very trying, I squeeze her with a big bear hug and tell her very dramatically 'I'm going to squeeze you and smush you and put you in a bottle and drink you with a purple straw'.... She starts giggling saying 'Noooooooooooo!!'

Before this, the potty training was hard and was becoming a control issue (for me and her)... then we tried potty training with this playful mindset as well... We'd put the Dora potty seat on the toilet and ask 'Please, please.. Can I use your pretty toilet seat... Oh! It's looks so nice.' She'd giggle with a 'No! It'd break if you use, mommy' and run to the potty. When we go out, I'd say 'I heard they have a very nice soap to wash hands, it smells sooooo good! Do you want to try it?' and then when we reach the bathroom, she's use the potty just to be able to try the soap.

Washing hair used to be so tough with screams... Then at grandma's place we had white colored creamy shampoo and creamy white soap... I told her it was snow white shampoo and snow white soap. She just loved that idea and loved that bath....It was a lightbulb moment for me! Now we have magical princess shampoo and princess soap for her at home now. [just an all natural handmade soap, smells of roses and is in the pink color that she's crazy about - we just named it 'magical princess soap and shampoo'. It's hers. We use other soaps and shampoos.]

Once when she refused to drink soups, I made her a golden colored broth and added a bit of ghee to it when the soup was hot.. It looked like sparkles...So, I told her 'it is the fairy soup!! Whenever we make that soup at home, the fairy visits and sprinkles some fairy dust in kid's bowls...' She has seen Tinkerbell and knows about fairy dust, so this worked like magic. The soup got drunk in no time.

We still have some tough moments at home -> when we are stressed out, or when the house is messy or when we are tired. And I'm just a beginner and have a long way to go.

This thread is a wonderful idea, as we all can learn from each other.

[GoBecGo]

I cannot list all my examples - i've never read Cohen, it just seems that i naturally do things his way.

Well, i say "i", in fact DD's bedtime soft toy has been raising her since she was about 18months old

[Hokulele]

Great thread!

[sarahr]

Great thread! My DH too is better than I am at remembering to be playful when my instinct is to lose patience. Generally, "Woofy," her stuffed dog, can get her to do many, many things that I can't.

[Vancouver Mommy]

To alleviate the regular mealtime complaints, my sister used to occasionally provide only an assortment of cooking utensils for eating rather than regular forks and spoons. The kids could pick from an assortment of mixing spoons, pasta strainers, spatulas, whisks, etc. It was messy but the kids loved it and it became a challenge to see who could get the most food into their mouths.

[woodchick]

DH does this great robot voice when he wants DD1 to do something that she's fighting against, say coming to the table. And he uses big words that she can't resist laughing at: "Cath-er-ine. Your presence is requested at the dinner table immediately. Please proceed to the table posthastly..." all in a monotone roboty voice.

He uses it sparingly, but it gets her every time!

I tend to turn my frustrations into song. I'll make up little melodies and the lyrics come from the event at the moment, "Get into the car, get into your seat. Slide into the straps and clap your feet!" Or some such nonesense!

[crittersmum]

'Love this thread!

When DD (2 1/2 years old) is having a meltdown, sometimes her cat puppet can help her calm down the rest of the way. The cat's at arms length from me, so she doesn't feel crowded;all it does is say "Meow" so she doesn't feel lectured at; and the cat can sniff her feet and hands to help DD re-establish a connection and build a bridge between us. Yay, White Kitty!

I feel like a goddess when I can turn a potential meltdown into giggles, although I gotta' say, it's nice to go to work a few days a week, where I don't have to make a puppet sing, "Hey boss! Could you get me that memmmmmooooo!"

[emilys_mom1]

[QUOTE=Aletheia;14734310]Hi-
I went out to the living room to look, said, "well, he's not in here. you keep looking, DH, and I'll go back in the room and look some more." He was in bed, covers pulled up, eyes gleaming. [QUOTE]

So did he stay in the bed though? I think that would work for me at first, but I think he would continue to get out of bed to keep playing the game. Mine is almost 4.

[_betsy_]

My 3 yo DD has been "riding" an imaginary pink "motorcycle" around the house for days now (from her body movements and hand positions, it looks more she's riding an imaginary foot-powered (think Razor) scooter, but she calls it a motorcycle). Yesterday, we had about 30 minutes at the playground before I had to get back home (walking distance) to get ready for work. Anyway, she and the baby were having a lot of fun, and so she was resistant to leaving. Totally understandable. But I had the baby in the sling, and I just can.not. pick them both up at the same time, especially not when the big one is fighting me.

I started to see the resistance and tension building in the 3 yo. I started to hear a particular annoyance and hardness in my voice. I stopped and said: "Hey! I totally forgot! Your motorcycle is in my back pocket! You want to come get it out or should I get it?" Totally changed the mood. She stuck her hand in the pocket of my jeans, yelled "Got it!" and off we went. One slinging a baby, one riding an imaginary pink motorcycle.

It's amazing what can "fit" in my back pocket! (No comments about how big my butt must be to fit a motorcycle in there!)

[Surfacing]

Originally Posted by seashells

Also, DH can sometimes encourage DD to eat something by pretending to be the food. "Aiiiii! Don't eat me!!!!!! I'm just an innocent chick pea!!!!!! HELLPPP!!" which makes her giggle and ruthlessly chomp on the poor chick pea.

We do that at our house with dd1. We call her The Salad Monster. We say to leaves on a fork as they are slowly heading towards her mouth: "No, no, it's The Salad Monster! Don't eat me! NOOOO!!! DON'T EAT ME!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!" and then she eats with big gusto.

[choosewisdom]

Originally Posted by _betsy_

It's amazing what can "fit" in my back pocket! (No comments about how big my butt must be to fit a motorcycle in there!)

LMBO! You made me laugh out loud. Good thing my neighbors are 30 yards away, or I may have startled them...