Anybody have to deal with the rude comments about Tofurkey?

[rcr]

For Thanksgiving we went to DH's cousin's house, and we brought a Tofurkey and some cranberry sauce (everybody brought something). I am SO SICK of the comments like "Hey, Joe, want some Tofurkey, wink wink laugh laugh..." or somebody thinking they are being funny and trying it and spitting it out. It happens every year, no matter where we go... the damn comments about what we eat. I have tried to respond about the previously-suffering animal that they are eating, but it does not seem to make them stop, and in fact they just laugh it off like I am some crazy PETA member, yk?

[GoBecGo]

Is this food you brought to share with them!? They are so rude! I am not a vegetarian, but i frequently eat out vegan (we have a great vegan cafe near us) and i LOVE their tofurkey, fakinbacon, sosages and so on. I think a lot of the problem is that they are trying it to mock and not to try it - if you eat tofurkey expecting turkey then yeah, it's different, but if you eat it as tofurkey, ie.e a DIFFERENT food which is also good, then it's lush! Really people should just not eat what they don't like and keep their mouth shut unless they can say something nice.

[tinybutterfly]

Originally Posted by rcr

For Thanksgiving we went to DH's cousin's house, and we brought a Tofurkey and some cranberry sauce (everybody brought something). I am SO SICK of the comments like "Hey, Joe, want some Tofurkey, wink wink laugh laugh..." or somebody thinking they are being funny and trying it and spitting it out. It happens every year, no matter where we go... the damn comments about what we eat. I have tried to respond about the previously-suffering animal that they are eating, but it does not seem to make them stop, and in fact they just laugh it off like I am some crazy PETA member, yk?

I'm not veg, but I do enjoy several foods that would be considered vegetarian or vegan.

Next year you might try just bringing some truly delicious veg casserole dishes. They might be more open to trying, really trying something that has ingredients they are more familiar with. It's way too easy to make fun of something that is so "different" to them.

Maybe ratatouillie or a Three Sisters casserole? Honeybaked lentils?

Sometimes it takes small steps to get other people used to different things.

I'm sorry you were treated rudely.

[maciascl]

Originally Posted by rcr

I have tried to respond about the previously-suffering animal that they are eating, but it does not seem to make them stop, and in fact they just laugh it off like I am some crazy PETA member, yk?

In my family this part of what you said would be the key. While it is totally rude & obnoxious for them to do that, next time try just laughing it off rather than tell them about the poor dead turkey on the table. If they don't feel like they are getting to you they may just stop. I am sorry you have to deal with that!

[jocelyndale]

I hear modern Tofurkey is somewhat palatable, but years and years ago (bear in mind, I've been allergic to soy since 1999), Tofurkey managed to be both bland *and* nasty at the same time. Yet people were so desperate for something reminiscent of the dead bird that they'd buy it . . . at least once.

I was lucky enough to taste it sometime in the early nineties and never had to spend my hard-earned cash on one of those things.

Anyhow, the reputation is very hard to shake, I'm sure.

[Liquesce]

I'm probably no help since even when I was a strict vegetarian I still found Tofurky humerous. But I will add that years ago Vegetarian Times ran this recipe as their Thanksgiving cover entree, and it was such a hit with my family -- vegetarians and non-vegetarians alike -- that it's become a Thanksgiving standard among the lot of us. It's easy but looks complicated, is pretty, tastes nice, and is satisfying. Of course meat eaters read it as a side-dish, but when there's a turkey on the table that's what they *want* it to be, so it works out a little better at a mixed gathering that a meat substitute might. I (obviously) recommend giving it a try. (Vegan variation at the bottom; that I've never tried.)

[Ahappymel]

I'm vegan.
I would personally never bring Tofurky to share with non-veggie people.
It inevitably invites the comments because, well, Tofurky is kind of weird food, especially to someone who has not tried it before
But if you were feeding yourself with it, I think it is VERY rude for others to making comments about your food.
I tend to get a bit snippy right back when someone says something about our veggie meals...I've been know to say, "Oh, and your bloody meal of something that's been dead for weeks is a better option..?"

But I'm trying to be a kinder, gentler vegan all the time

[Ruthla]

When I was a vegetarian, I never had Tofurkey at Thanksgiving- I only ate meat analogues like that when I was feeding just myself (such as a tofurkey or phoney bologna sandwich when I was tired of peanut butter.) Thanksgiving was all about enjoying a scrumptious harvest feast- the yams and potatoes, corn muffins, squash casserole, two kinds of cranberry sauce, some "stuffing" cooked outside the bird and mushroom gravy to pour on the stuffing (while everybody else ate what I was eating plus turkey, turkey gravy, and the stuffing cooked with meat.) I never felt "deprived" with all those yummy dishes on the table, nor did I ever make any rude comments about the dead bird on the table. I never said anything more than "no thank you" when offered meat.

If I went someplace where people made fun of the food I brought, for whatever reason (whether because it's vegan or because it's made with unusual ingredients, such as millet stuffing instead of wheat stuffing) I'd be hesitant to return. It's a waste of food to take a little bit and "pretend to gag on it" and incredibly disrespectful. Either try some or not, but if you don't like it, leave it politely on the side of your plate and say "no thank you" when offered more.

I could give you lots of ideas for "omnivore-friendly vegan holiday foods" to bring along, but the underlying issue here is their disrespect. Why do you even join holiday meals with people who disrespect you? Why not stay home and make your own holiday traditions instead?

[jrabbit]

THIS is why we stopped going to "family" thanksgiving - instead doing "friend" dinners, veg only. We happen to love tofurkey. don't know why we only have it once a year!

--janis

[themamamama]

We have family members who laugh at our Tofurky, but we laugh along with them because, well, Tofurky is a really funny word. When my nieces first heard it, when they were about 8, they went around saying "Tofurky, tofurky, tofurky..." for like 5 minutes. Still makes me giggle thinking about it.

Still, I understand about getting sick of the constant comments about your life and choices. My grandfather used to make comments about grazing, constantly, because I was a vegetarian.

[JollyGG]

I saw this from new posts and felt a need to respond from an omnivorous perspective.

Tofurkey confuses us. From it's name it seems to be a meat substitute or a meat like substance. Well if you object to meat why do you want anything reminiscent of meat. If you don't want turkey then why have a turkey-like substitute. We don't get it. Many people make fun of something they don't get.

I don't know if that makes sense or not. If not please feel free to disregard my perspective.

My SIL is a vegetarian and my FIL feels a need to make comments and jokes because he's a jerk. So that could always just be the case as well.

[Liquesce]

Originally Posted by JollyGG

I saw this from new posts and felt a need to respond from an omnivorous perspective.

Tofurkey confuses us. From it's name it seems to be a meat substitute or a meat like substance. Well if you object to meat why do you want anything reminiscent of meat. If you don't want turkey then why have a turkey-like substitute. We don't get it. Many people make fun of something they don't get.

I would actually hope that this is not a common confusion. That's not meant as any kind of personal dig ... it's just that, while I have certainly known vegetarians who objected to the taste and texture of meat, that's never been a prerequisite for being a vegetarian, and out of a whole lot of vegetarians I have never yet personally known anyone to make the choice to be one simply due to such an objection. If it's commonly thought that vegetarians aren't eating meat simple because they don't like it in the same way that someone who skips over black jelly beans or pickled beets doesn't like those things ... well. That would speak to a much bigger gap in understanding than just "what is the deal with Tofurky, anyway?"

[lerlerler]

Originally Posted by Liquesce

I would actually hope that this is not a common confusion. That's not meant as any kind of personal dig ... it's just that, while I have certainly known vegetarians who objected to the taste and texture of meat, that's never been a prerequisite for being a vegetarian, and out of a whole lot of vegetarians I have never yet personally known anyone to make the choice to be one simply due to such an objection. If it's commonly thought that vegetarians aren't eating meat simple because they don't like it in the same way that someone who skips over black jelly beans or pickled beets doesn't like those things ... well. That would speak to a much bigger gap in understanding than just "what is the deal with Tofurky, anyway?"

Well it IS a bit of a confusion to THIS omnivore as well...
I kind of "get it" but there's this thought..

"wait, you find eating the flesh of dead animals offensive/disgusting/unhealthy/unkind (yup, I GET THAT!) so.... you make a soy product that tries to TASTE just like dead flesh...."

I GET being a veg'n! I love me some veg foods but I find it weird...

(BUT as a Jew, I also find non-pork "bacon" and "kosher-for-passover taste-almost-just-like-cake cake a bit weird as well - I'm a purist I guess.... )

[Liquesce]

Originally Posted by lerlerler

"wait, you find eating the flesh of dead animals offensive/disgusting/unhealthy/unkind (yup, I GET THAT!) so.... you make a soy product that tries to TASTE just like dead flesh...."

"... without actually carrying with it the same varied moral/ethical/religious/environmental/health/or what-have-you baggage that different kinds of vegetarians may perceive the real deal as carrying." Yup, that's about the long and short of it.

If you think that's odd, you should see the heated veg*n forum conversations that sometimes occur regarding the futuristic prospect of artificially vat-grown cloned meats.

[JollyGG]

Originally Posted by lerlerler

Well it IS a bit of a confusion to THIS omnivore as well...
I kind of "get it" but there's this thought..

"wait, you find eating the flesh of dead animals offensive/disgusting/unhealthy/unkind (yup, I GET THAT!) so.... you make a soy product that tries to TASTE just like dead flesh...."

I GET being a veg'n! I love me some veg foods but I find it weird...

(BUT as a Jew, I also find non-pork "bacon" and "kosher-for-passover taste-almost-just-like-cake cake a bit weird as well - I'm a purist I guess.... )

I'm glad I'm not the only one. I must be a purist as well.

My husband is allergic to wheat, tomatoes, and poultry. We don't try to recreate the foods he can't have. The substitutions is never quite the same and is just a little weird. There are tons of perfectly wonderful foods in this world that don't seem to be pretending to be something else (tofurkey may not be attempting to replicate meat but it's name can certainly sound like it is). I'd rather eat something unrelated to the food that we can't have/ have religious objections to / have moral objections to /etc.

[allgirls]

I like tofurkey...as to why I occasionally eat meat analogues...well...sometimes I miss it. Not enough to eat it but sometimes I want a turkey dinner with the fixins...and then I make tofurkey sandwiches the next day with stuffing etc.

I think if you were raised veg. without ever tasting it and having the emotional attachment to that food(every Christmas, Thanksgiving, Easter were turkey meals in our house) then it wouldn't make sense.

So while it doesn't make sense intellectually it does make sense on a "comfort food" level.

as much sense as any emotional eating does.

[nolansmummy]

People have different reasons for becoming vegetarian. I did not do so because i disliked the taste of meat, therefore this thanksgiving i bought myself a fake "turkey roast" thing. It tasted pretty good covered in cranberrry sauce too

I think the main problem is family not being respectful of your choices. I was worried this year, since i was out of town with family i hadn't seen in awhile. They were very accommodating (changing a few recipes to get rid of the meat) and overall it was a great experience. My sister has made fun of me a bunch, but i just laugh it off.

I don't have any advice, i just try to avoid all conversations about my eating habits around family. Its just easier that way, then to try and explain my choices, or change their thinking yk.

[Ahappymel]

I grew up with the flavor/textures of meat and do eat the meat analogues for variety/fun.
But I will say....I enjoy them because I KNOW what they are and that they are plant-based. I would never enjoy it if I knew it was an animal.
Having said that, my kids are being raised vegan and I buy them the meat analogue stuff, mainly because I know what they are going to be faced with out in the world and want them to know what their veggie options are.

[rcr]

Originally Posted by JollyGG

I saw this from new posts and felt a need to respond from an omnivorous perspective.

Tofurkey confuses us. From it's name it seems to be a meat substitute or a meat like substance. Well if you object to meat why do you want anything reminiscent of meat. If you don't want turkey then why have a turkey-like substitute. We don't get it. Many people make fun of something they don't get.

I don't know if that makes sense or not. If not please feel free to disregard my perspective.

My SIL is a vegetarian and my FIL feels a need to make comments and jokes because he's a jerk. So that could always just be the case as well.

Almost every one of my friends is veg, and I don't know a single person who does not eat meat because they don't like the taste. Our family loves fake meat - it is the bloody tortured soul that we choose not to eat.

[Jelinifer]

Originally Posted by tinybutterfly

I'm not veg, but I do enjoy several foods that would be considered vegetarian or vegan.

Next year you might try just bringing some truly delicious veg casserole dishes. They might be more open to trying, really trying something that has ingredients they are more familiar with. It's way too easy to make fun of something that is so "different" to them.

Maybe ratatouillie or a Three Sisters casserole? Honeybaked lentils?

Sometimes it takes small steps to get other people used to different things.

I'm sorry you were treated rudely.

At my family get togethers I could bring anything without meat analogues..... it could even be just pasta and tomato sauce but because I brought it, it would be "Jen's weird vegan food" to my uncles and my grandmother. I honestly now just bring enough servings for DH and I to eat and just ignore them when they start. I've tried reasoning with them, explaining my beliefs to them, and even stooping to their level and making fun of them right back... but nothing has changed their tune over the years, and it's tiring.... so I just tune them out. I love Tofurkey personally, and I'm not going to sit there with a tossed salad just so my ignorant family members won't raz me.