Anybody have to deal with the rude comments about Tofurkey? - Page 2

[kalisis]

As a vegetarian, I don't really understand Tofurky either. It just makes no sense to me - most of the meat analogues don't make much sense to me. And honestly, if I were going to bring something to Thanksgiving dinner, I'd bring a slightly normal dish that had been veganized or made vegetarian. I cooked a turkey this year since my mom and dad were coming, but besides that and the gravy made from those drippings, everything else was vegan. And I had plenty to eat.

I don't know, I think I'm different than a lot of veg*ns. It is a personal choice I make and I don't have to make any kind of a deal out of it. If asked, I'll explain my reasons, but I try to blend in as much as possible and avoid the conflict or 'weirdness' of it.

I'm sorry that your family has to make comments; mine would definitely make fun of a Tofurky. I either wouldn't bring one, ever, or bring it as a joke and find the fun in it. No use getting upset over something I already know will happen and I am under absolutely no false pretense that i will change any of their minds (I grew up in Wyoming and they're all hunters...).

[wytchywoman]

The immature part of me would be sorely tempted to gag and retch every time someone took a bite of turkey and say "ewwww, you just ate dead flesh, from an animal that spent it's life in small cage covered in it's own feces". My guess is after three bites they'd probably get the point that it's not enjoyable to get razzed about your food choices while you're trying to eat. Is it childish? Yup, but it just may work and giving them a taste of their own medicine might be enough to get them to shut up from here on out. Then again they could just think you're a crazy extremist and it could totally inflame the situation too.

[Epicurvegan]

Originally Posted by rcr

I have tried to respond about the previously-suffering animal that they are eating, but it does not seem to make them stop, and in fact they just laugh it off like I am some crazy PETA member, yk?

This is why they're acting that way - they can see you're upset and their behaviour bothers you, so they're going to keep on doing it because they're getting a reaction out of you. If you don't acknowledge or respond to their rudeness, they'll get tired of it because it's no fun for them anymore.

I've done the same things as you myself, and telling people about animal suffering - especially over a table full of food - is not the best time to get them to listen. Their behaviour is a reflection of their discomfort, whether or not they know it, and it's how they deal with what you and your Tofurky represent. If you try to talk to them about veganism at the table during dinner, they'll think you're preachy and militant (as they did me) and continue on with their rude comments and jokes.

Also, if they see you're unhappy, it gives them more fuel for their fire, so to speak. It proves to them being vegan is not a happy thing. Show them you're confidant about your choices and that you enjoy your food by not reacting to them. They'll eventually stop and perhaps even some of them will start to wonder what yumminess on your plate has you more focused on enjoying your food than being annoyed by them.

[KaylaBeanie]

I don't eat tofurkey, but I do enjoy some fake meat. I love morningstar farms chik'n nuggets...they're so good! However, I'm a strange vegetarian. I loved meat, and it was a huge sacrifice giving it up. For me, becoming veggie was solely a moral decision, so if I can eat fake meat that tastes close to the real thing every now and then...that's a good thing.

[lilyka]

I'm vegan and Tofurkey makes me giggle. if I were to eat it I would likely gag for real. I think it is gross. But I still like the taste of real meat. the thought of putting a dead animal into my mouth and chewing also grosses me out. With tofurkey I can't get over the soy junk over processed aspect of it. That said I would never be rude to someone who was eating it or waste their food just to make fun. that was rude and wrong of your family. crack a few jokes though.. come on, they call it tofurkey. its funny.

[BeanyMama]

I like Tofurky! I probably wouldn't bring it to an omni dinner, I might go for a more normalish veggie dish, like a pp said. But I think if people are laughing at the weirdness and punny name, the best bet might be to laugh along with them as you slice yourself another generous helping of it. I'd rather have people joke about it than do the uncomfortable, silent gross-out face.

[Ahappymel]

I'm vegan and was raised eating meat. I don't dislike the flavor or texture at all.
But I won't eat it because of my values. I wouldn't enjoy it knowing it is animal.
I only enjoy the fake stuff because I know what it is...veggie.

[NC EcoMaMa]

I am not confused why someone would want to eat a meat substitute. I personally like the flavor, but I don't want to take a life to get it.

For me it is no different than liking milk, but choosing to drink soy, rice, almond or hemp milk.

I like to eat ice cream, but instead I make one out of coconut milk.
I like to eat Amy's veggie burgers and ones that I make myself, and I make them look like burgers because that is still the shape that the buns come in. Same with veggie hot dogs.

There are so many items that I have found replacements for because as much as I enjoy the flavor, I don't like what it is.

I love the Field Roast Grain Meat products. Yep, shaped to look like something we are familiar with. Tastes for some of the products nothing like meat, but so delicious, others very much so like meat.

It also makes it easier when you are converting a recipe.

I also like to make vegan products that do not mimic meat, but it is all about choice and what we are in the mood for. I know people who use vegan shrimp because they are allergic to shellfish. Because they are allergic no one questions why they are doing it, but I am surprised at how many people think that a moral or religious choice to eat it is somehow less meaningful or ridiculous.

I also am tired of being the joke of others discomfort or being thought of as strange for eating it or being asked why I would eat it. I don't care what anyone else eats. I know people who eat dog, cat, horses, rabbits and it is none of my business and I am sure if I made fun of them, it would be considered offensive.

I remember when some moms were trying to Boycott the Olympics in Korea because dog was being served. How do they think Hindus and religious nations who practiced vegetarianism or worshiped specific animals felt participating when we sponsored them and had McDonalds and other companies who served something they considered so sacred splashed all over the place.

Everyone has to make their own choice and not worry about what anyone else wants to do, want to eat, how they eat it. It all comes down to not having enough inner peace and faith in your own choice. It brings out judgmental behaviors which lead to sarcasm and making fun of others.

If people spent as much time trying to make others comfortable and feel good as they do trying to figure out why they are doing something, judging that choice or making fun of that choice, imagine what a better world our children could live in.

Imagine…

Peace & Blessings and Happy Holidays!
Jo

[NC EcoMaMa]

Originally Posted by BeanyMama

I like Tofurky! I probably wouldn't bring it to an omni dinner, I might go for a more normalish veggie dish, like a pp said. But I think if people are laughing at the weirdness and punny name, the best bet might be to laugh along with them as you slice yourself another generous helping of it. I'd rather have people joke about it than do the uncomfortable, silent gross-out face.

I have done the yummy yummy while I served myself and laughed along with them.

I have noticed after a few times of doing this, it stops. They get bored and find the next thing to pick on. Pickers always will find something to pick about.

[susumama]

Originally Posted by rcr

For Thanksgiving we went to DH's cousin's house, and we brought a Tofurkey and some cranberry sauce (everybody brought something). I am SO SICK of the comments like "Hey, Joe, want some Tofurkey, wink wink laugh laugh..." or somebody thinking they are being funny and trying it and spitting it out. It happens every year, no matter where we go... the damn comments about what we eat. I have tried to respond about the previously-suffering animal that they are eating, but it does not seem to make them stop, and in fact they just laugh it off like I am some crazy PETA member, yk?

Like others have said, I'd bring something different next time. I mean TOFURKEY?? I think most vegans would gagg. It's hardly a taste sensation.

When going to an omni event I view it as a chance to show people how delicious vegan eating can be & bring along a delicious veg dish. One that has previously been enjoyed by omni friends & brought compliments on it's flavour. I think that does much more to both further the veg cause & show that you can eat wonderful, tasty, healthful food & be vegan (No offence to the tofurkey lovers out there but I haven't often heard those 3 adjectives in the same sentence as tofurkey very often). You can't honestly be expecting any one to eat the tofurkey (because they already have turkey) so knowing they won't eat it, it doesn't fit the description of a dish to "share". So maybe you are also trying to get a rise out of them by overtly putting your lifestyle in their face & highlighting Turkey VS Tofurkey rather than getting in the spirit of a day of sharing & 'thanksgiving' by bringing a vegan dish that you know others would like to eat too. We don't have Thanksgiving (obviously) in Australia but are faced with this situation at Christmas here. We have a traditional English roast dinner. Due to the plethora of veggies we have a great meal & most people don't even notice that we don't put meat on our plate. I take chick pea gravy (from Veganomicon) for us & anyone interested, Lubyia bi zayt (lebanese green beans) & a big fruit salad & chocolate peanut butter pie as our contribution and it's a happy, peaceful day. Turning up with a tofurkey would give a totally different feel to the day. It would be confrontational. A blatant statement of rejection of their lifestyle - which is all fine - but is a day of family & communion a day when you want to do this?

[NC EcoMaMa]

My children like Tofurkey and like having it with their holiday meal so they get to have something they like, just as others get to have their Turkey. They really love Celebration Roast, so most of the time we bring something like that and some of the Tofurkey slices for my little boy.

I am surprised that so many people find it not quite right to bring an equivalent to a meal. When we go to BBQ's we always bring our own veggie dogs and burgers. Sometimes I get tired of hearing you can eat the potato salad or the green salad and so do the kids.

They want to feel like they have their complete meal and I won't sacrifice that joy for them, not even if I think it isn't yummy and some of the stuff they like, I do not, but I would never say something to make them feel that their choice was wrong or disgusting or shame them by making fun of them.

We don't ever think it is about proving a point. Sacrificing ourselves and our own meal to make everyone else happy isn't what events are about either. It is about everyone having what makes them feel comfortable or good. If it weren't, then they should say, no turkey either.

I would try discussing it with the host of the event first to make sure that this is fine and bringing a second dish to share would be the best way to make sure that you are covering all bases.

I do notice here in the Southern United States, most everything on tables has meat in it. They even use chicken broth in their mashed potatoes. They have bacon in just about everything, most cooked veggies and salads included. Marshmallows in their sweet potatoes. (I do this dish with vegan marshmallows) But it is very hard to eat everything on the table here. Oh and lard in their pies... Unless your host is very aware and you can trust them not to think not a big deal or understand that broth is still meat, which I see constantly... Even our cooking shows thing that animal rennet is still considered vegetarian and cooking fish for the vegetarian coming to dinner is a gift. It can be much more complex.

Peace & Blessings,

Jo

[susumama]

Chicken broth in mashed potato!? Oh Lord what will they think of next??? My goodness I can see your dilema. And I agree that I would bring the tofurkey if the kids wanted it but would cover the bases & also bring something 'for everyone'. Having an English food tradition here it is much easier to find vegan food at a holiday gathering as they tend to keep veggies & meat separate. The food traditions of your southern states sound like a veggie's worst nightmare! I will have to look into it further as we are taking a family vacation to the states next year & are visiting Tennessee & Missouri - I would have just assumed I was safe eating some of the 'vegetable' dishes you mentioned! Thanks for the heads up

[NC EcoMaMa]

My hubby is English so he gets confused a bit too. We have an Italian chain called Ragazzi's. Their idea of marinara has pork boiled into it. There is a restaurant guide that helps you find out what is where.

http://www.happycow.net/

Lots of stuff that makes it so hard to eat out. We are very careful even with most places and their salad. Anchovies in the dressings.

You won't be far from where we are, North Carolina. If you were coming this way there are a couple of amazing places to eat. The Remedy Diner in Raleigh has become one of our favorites and of course lots of Indian places.

I love bringing for everyone and love when it goes quick.

Check out the Happy Cow. They have global listings, but it does make dining in the United States a little more comfortable.

Peace & Happy Holidays!

Jo