While I wasn't able to drink water without nausea and was ravenously hungry but absolutely nothing agreed with my stomach, I think that I was definitely more sensitive than usual to the way things are here. I felt positively violent toward my dh when he didn't rush around to help prepare food when I was finally able to eat and had to start making up for weeks of not eating. He may have been more helpful, but I think he was scared.
Another opposite to my usual pg experience is that I have energy commensurate with my food intake. In previous pgs, my head felt like lead and I couldn't sit up for most of the first trimester. This time, as long as I eat, I'm completely fine energy-wise, like I'm not pg.
What this has meant is that I can still spend my days bent over picking things up off the floor, doing dishes, making meals, doing laundry and building stuff while looking after our boys sometimes alone for 17 and 18 hr stretches (some of that time they're sleeping, of course, but I don't fully sleep when dh isn't here because the whole home is under my sole care. My naturopath calls it night-watchwoman syndrome.
This is a typical situation for us, and I'm keeping up waaaay better than I was when I was chronically ill for 6 years. A little while ago, I was asked to help at my friend's daycare for a day and I did. I was shocked to find out that looking after the ten children in my charge that day and all of their needs (our youngest came with me too and was absolutely easy and delightful the whole day), it was like a vacation. The strain on me that day, with the chores and the diaper changes (my group ranged in age from 18 months to five yrs with most of them in the 2-3 range), was a fraction of what my days usually are like for me. It would have taken me a week at that rate of exertion to equal a day in my home.
Then I started noticing what other families' days are like, and there appears to be a rather enormous difference.
Now, on the very positive side of things, I put an enormous amount of effort in, and there are lasting results of this. Others constantly comment on how shocking it is that our boys can have a conflict and resolve it themselves quickly and (usually) without violence. They are very bonded with one another and loyal to one another and attached to me and dh. Their social skills are years ahead of their chronological ages, as are all of their skills, so it's a very intense ride, but they are thriving.
If I look at them, I can't worry because they have abilities and knowledge that I didn't acquire until I was an adult (hence why they have it now; I share freely), but when I see the time so punctuated every day and sometimes I can't remember if I really had a conversation with each of them- a whole one, not just a directive or a 'fly-by' and that bothers me a lot. There have been days when the only hugs they received were at bedtime, and I was with them all day, running around like a maniac.
Anyway, just before I posted my op, I had talked to them (admittedly in stressed tones, not angry or scary, but obviously stressed) about this- the time I can't spend with them if I'm always managing their crises. I explained how the time works and that I don't have any extra, that there are as many hours each day as there are and I would like to spend more of them reading and playing and engaging them in real conversations than I do now while I am running after them cleaning up giant messes and pulling them apart when they each have a shelf held over their heads threatening to strike (they never do- it's just the threat that works to pump up the adrenaline and then they're done). They had calmed down after that, which is the only reason I could post at all, and then for the rest of the day, they were really relaxed and conscientious, agreeable and respectful of me and one another (dh was at work and still is until tomorrow). It was like it finally sunk in!
Soooo, I had time to make their meals and snacks and tea, eat with them, play catch and wrestle and tickle them, read and talk with them as well as listen to their stories. We had time for lots of hugs, and they happily exclaimed that they didn't cover their bed in toys and mess so that they could have more time to be with me before bed. This didn't hinder their playtime at all; they were very engaged in play without throwing everything they own onto their bed as is usual. Then I ended up falling asleep with them in their bed after reding to them.
I love that.
Now THIS is the sort of day I could never tire of. I still had a lot of work to do, but nothing crisis-oriented after the talk. I am a very efficient worker, so I can do most things very quickly and that meant I had lots of time with them even though everything was done for the evening before bed.
This seems to happen frequently that when I finally post about something that has been going on for months of years, it stops immediately- that day. It just happened the other day too with sleeping issues. I think now that it's because I don't post until I have it figured out, and want confirmation here, only to find that my figuring it out was the key to fixing it. Sigh. I bet a lot of my posts on mdc follow that pattern.
Anyway, I'm a mama of many!!! I don't usually think of myself that way, but now that we have a babe in utero, I find that I am admitting my many-ness now. My friend who is a dr exclaimed that I'll be a grand multi-para now with #5. What a great achievement! I want a certificate.
eta: Hey! Mataji4, we're expecting around the same time. I'm due in summer 2010, somewhere in the july to august range.