September 07 Mamas - December already??? - Page 3

[Plaid Leopard]

Good morning

Yann has been talking non-stop since he woke up. Very cute but I haven't had enough coffee yet.

DH didn't get the job he applied for. We may have to move into a smaller house or a same size house farther out... I don't mind moving, I just wish I knew for sure what was happening.

Sending wonderful, happy, joyful thoughts to all of you and your families.

[mrsb422]

Katie Yeah, work stinks. Some of my coworkers do have young children, but they are all men with wives that stay home. None of them ever seem to really be that torn up about being away from their kids either, which I just can’t wrap my head around. For all my husband’s faults, he definitely misses Marty when he’s away. You’re a very brave woman I still haven’t flown with just Marty. I’m terrified!!

Rachel Doing nothing IS exhausting I felt like that yesterday. I stayed home, even took a nap when Marty did and I still was pooped at the end of the day! Sorry about the snow

Faliciagayle mama. I hate money stuff too. It’s so unsettling and generally horrible. I hope it works out for you

Plaid So good to see you on here!! Sorry about DH’s job, that stinks. I hope you get some answers soon too…all the “up in the air” business has got to be hard to live with.

Well I have a headache to beat the band and am really on the verge of puking. What gives?? Seriously, enough already!! I’ve officially spent ½ this pregnancy trying not to puke. This is ridiculous. DH and I are supposed to go out tonight, Mom is coming to watch Marty, so we can go Christmas shopping for him. I am really looking forward to it and the dinner afterward, but it would be nice if I actually wanted to eat something!

DS has taken recently to literally just beating on me and I don’t understand it. I don’t understand where he ever got the idea or what prompted it. He does not get hit and has not seen anyone else get hit, so what gives??!! He just hits me and hits me over and over and over. I’ll be talking to him calmly, shouting, pretending to cry…I’ve tried everything, but when he gets into this “zone” he doesn’t even hear me. What the heck is that about?? I just want my sweet boy back

[mommajb]

Just so we are clear: I hate work of any sort. I hate money of all amounts. Too much can cause problems just like too little but it is a better prolem to have. I hate illness, injury, medical care and insurance. For reasons see above about money. Moving at this point might be exciting. A friend that is expecting her fifth is literally trying to buy a hotel to live in. We could use the spac ebut then again moving is work. I'll go now...

[*jeanine*]

I too hate work. I especially hate doing work that someone with more experience was *supposed* to do, but effed all up. I especially hate that work when it involves trying to figure out who owes how much money. And I hate it even more when it involves trying to get said money from a health insurance company. And the thing I hate most is that it takes me away from what is supposed to be my job, which is raising my children. Pretty much my whole life involves everything mommajb hates .

[mommajb]

Really I am not all that hate filled. I just seem to not enjoy the things that make the world go 'round.

[Faliciagayle]

Jess - have you read Happiest Toddler on the Block? And How to Talk so Kids Will Listen and Listen so Kids Will Talk?
very, very, very good books. The advice and suggestions in HTotB are simple and work. Mind blowing. I bet Marty would look at your and think "dude. She gets me." Worth a checkout from the library.


Of course, if you've already read them both and gained nothing, forget I mentioned it



And I'm a lover, not a hater.


Plaid: I hope you get some answers soon

[Faliciagayle]

Any update from Sunshine?

[*jeanine*]

If you go to my FB wall, I posted about not liking morning, and she posted a response about her morning (yesterday morning) which kinda has an update in it. That's all I know.

[mrsb422]

mommajb I hate money too. We are either arguing over it or spending too much of it and both leave me with anxiety. It truly is the root of all evil.

Jeanine to everything you said…insurance companies and collections-type jobs are the worst. Anything involving money, sickness, all of it…it all stinks. I had to call the insurance company the other day after the ped reminded me that we had an outstanding balance I looked at the bill closely and realized that a claim put in months ago wasn’t covered. I researched it further to find out that they billed it as out-of-network which is incorrect. Then of course I panicked that I missed being notified that our ped was going out-of-network or something…this never happened of course, except in my anxiety-ridden brain. When I finally called the insurance company they were like “Oops! Sorry about that. We’ll take care of it and it’ll get paid in 20-30 business days”. Ok, I work in the business world…that is not an ok timeframe or deadline. It is completely way too long, but I was just relieved she was #1 – pleasant and #2 – helpful…so few people are anymore!

Faliciagayle I will definitely check those out Thank you so much!!

Sunshine I’ve been wondering too and …hope everything is ok and works out for her soon.

Wendi I emailed Wendi the other day in case anyone else was wondering. She’s ok, but life is overwhelming her a bit…we’ve all been there. Just figured I’d update the group!

Well I had Marty’s conference today and to my delight most was good That’s all I can ask for. The only thing the teacher had negatively to say (and it was more like “We’re working on…”) was that he needs to “use words” more in confrontations (no duh…see yesterday’s post ) and work on self-help skills more. They require them, as part of potty learning, to learn to completely dress themselves. Ok..he’s 2 ½ …that’s so not happening any time soon if you want the clothes on the right body parts She said he’s bright though, interested in learning, creative, and really just a joy to be around. I am the proudest mama in the world right now…he is everything I could dream of. Hitting fits and all…I would never trade ‘em for a second!

DH on the other hand is going to get the boot if he isn’t careful!! I called him around 2 pm at work when I hadn’t heard from him all day, even after an email around 8 am and got his voicemail. His voicemail was never changed from yesterday to say he was out of the office. I tried again at 5, same thing. Tried again at 6 and finally he picked up. Um, excuse me but is it so hard for a man with a computer, phone, cell phone with email, AND a blackberry to send a 2-sec message, text, email SOMETHING and say “hey, busy day. Ttyl”????? Seriously. I think the consideration gene was missing when he was born or something. I was terrified he never woke up or something since he gets up after we leave in the morning…seriously. What if it had been an emergency. He just doesn’t get it and says I’m just “hormonal and overreacting”…someone had better hide all the sharp objects

Have a wonderful night mamas… to you all

[sunshine's mama]

Hi.

I'm sorry about not being on here and updating and checking in. My mom has dial up and everything takes forever to load here......and on Facebook.....and everywhere else it seems.

She works from home again and is on the computer from the moment she wakes up and by the time she's done in the evening, I'm too tired to mess with waiting for things to load.

We had our hearing this past Tuesday. Things didn't go as planned. The judge we were supposed to go before was out of town suddenly and so all his business that day was pushed on another judge who was already busy himself.

I got there at 930 with my ppl, dressed appropriatly, and by 1230, our time hadn't come yet (original time was 10am but you have to be there 30 min early to check in). My lawyer walked out in the corridor and ran into the baliff who asked if we had seen anyone from the girl's father's side and he said no (by now they were 3ish hours late).

We got the ONLY judge on the floor who gives a courtesy call to the other parties lawyers to say, "hey....where are you? it's time..."...if they had waited another 10 minutes, nobody at that office would've ans the phone bc it was lunch time. All they are required to do is leave a message. Someone ans the phone and was like, "it's not on our calender" and then tried to blame my side (who said, "no. we are here bc of something YOU did...not bc of something we didn't do...this is your issue." and they asked for a continuance and we said no way jose.

They arrived 30 minutes later and had to call the girls' father at work to say, "um, we needed to be at court 3 hours ago...." so I'm sure he was irritated.

By the time they got there and got through talking to the magistrate it was 2pm and the courts close at 4. So we HAD to continue it. I was soooo bc I showed up on time, I was there and they weren't. And I'm sure it was all planned that way. At the end of the day, I did end up with more time with the girls bc I got to dictate how often, how long and am kicking myself for not asking for more but it is what it is. This new temporary interim visitation order expires on November 30 at 130pm (time/day of new hearing)....

I am very tempted at this juncture to just tell him, "I don't want your money. You don't have to give me child support...Just let me have the girls back..." and see what he does. The Goose is out of school the 22nd for holiday break and I told him if he wanted to that he could just drop her and the Bee off at mom's so they could spend the day since I was getting them at 330 anyways and she hemmed and hawed about it and so then I said, "you won't have to PAY for daycare that day for both of them..." and he said, "Sure. Ok. That'll work." Really???? I made it about money and him not having to spend it on the girls and voila....My lawyer swears that this entire thing is to get out of paying child support.

This all just needs to end. Goose is drawing pictures of grey suns with the word help in it (it's dying and unhappy she says), pictures of girls crying that went from normal color faces and blue tears to dark green faces with black tears that say, "Sad gril. i miss mommy" on them. Neither one of them are eating alot bc he's just feeding them junk and they've gotten used to it. Goose takes 3 bites and says her belly hurts and wants to just sit on me so then the Bee wants to sit on me and there goes dinner.

Everyone is like, "Goose is prolly giving him a hard time..." and I am quick to reply with, "No. Prolly not unfortunatly. She is allowed unlimited Wii and Nintendo DS play without me there telling her no. He's boxed up all her toys and books, the Bee's too so there isn't alot to do but video games and tv. It's most 5yo's dreams...no rules, no "no.....it's not gonna get old that quick.

When they come to see me, Goose talks about daddy's friend Becky all the time. Becky was over the other day. She painted my toes and nails see?? She brushed my teeth last night and read me bedtime stories bc daddy was busy with the Bee.....And it makes me want to ::vomit:: bc she is there with MY life. MY children. MY house. I am so not a MY person but that is my life.....as crappy as it was for awhile, it was mine....And we were happy the last 6 months. No arguing. Talking. Communicating. There were more hugs. More kisses....Just more of everything....and behind my back he was doing this.

His life is the same pretty much...he even has a brand new 2010 car.

Mine is upside down....I don't have a home of my own, I have none of my things, I have no income. I'm trying to figure out how to scrounge up $ for a Christmas tree and something for under it for the girls.....they don't need much. I have the same 2 pair of jeans, 3 tops and 1 bra that I was able to take with me and he has everything......I just want the girls.

I called to say hello and goodnight to the girls just a few minutes ago and SHE is over there with her son (13 I think) and they are playing Wii and it was so loud and the Goose barely talked to me.....she was too excited to play the game and tell me that Becky and her son were there too playing....laughing that she just said, "Bye mom. Here's the Bee..." and then Bee talked and jabbered for about 4 minutes but I could barely her bc it was so loud with the laughter from him and his new woman and the Wii game.....

So, now I'm sitting here crying, missing the girls, wanting this to be all over bc it should never have happened in the first place, missing him which makes me but I can't help it. Crying bc I don't know what to do about Christmas....they'll be with me. I have so many people around me right now and it's such a blessing but even then, I feel so alone. I know things will get better, I just need alot of help seeing the end of that tunnel......

I love you guys. I hope to be able to check in more.....Sorry this is an all about me post.....but I knew ya'll have been waiting for updates.....so I figured I'd just give a giant one. LOL.

[sunshine's mama]

holy canoli batman. i HONESTLY didn't mean for it to be that long.

i am housesitting for a friend and am alone in front of the fire and just started typing.

[*jeanine*]

Sunshine - if someone could send the girls something for xmas, what would it be?

[~Katie~]

I'm so sorry, Sunshine. I'm praying for you every day. Please let us know whatever you need! PM's if necessary!

[Plaid Leopard]

Sunshine - Hang in there. I'm so sorry you are going through this but I'm sure the judge will see what this is all about and you will have your girls back soon.

[ishyfishie]

Originally Posted by *jeanine*

Sunshine - if someone could send the girls something for xmas, what would it be?

Yes, this! Or you, hun--like clothes for you?? This whole thing just breaks my heart. I wish there were more we could do for you.

[mommajb]

Sunshine pm me with sizes, you know I am close so postage isn't a big deal and I have lots to share. s

[leanbh]

Originally Posted by mommajb

Sunshine pm me with sizes, you know I am close so postage isn't a big deal and I have lots to share. s

that!!!

[Faliciagayle]

Sunshine: big hugs. Please do let us help.

[mrsb422]

Sunshine We are here for you, mama. No need to apologize for a long post, we’ve all been dying to know what’s happening with you – aching for your pain and for your girls. Please let us know what we can do to help you? Can we get the girls a Christmas present? Some clothes for you? Seriously Gia…let us help you. We want to.

[*jeanine*]

Kinda quiet on here lately. snicker snicker

Jess - today's the day you find out, right? Let us know so we know which one of your lists to concentrate on.

Alicia - Are you a nick-namer? Or do you plan to use babe's full name? I really like Macabee. And Benjamin. Or Benjamin Macabee. Or Benjamin Maxwell to keep DH happy. Unless there's a separate middle name list....

Lindsay - Is Ciara pronounced Key-air-uh or Keer-uh? And how do you pronounce Clodagh?