Hoping this is the right forum and that it is safe to discuss this here, as I believe it is.
I weaned my ds, just 4, at 3.5…not really his decision, more so mine. I started night weaning him (he was still nursing every 2 hours or so at night…) and then I had surgery and became paranoid that I wouldn’t be able to pump and dump all the junk I had in my system from the surgery (when I pumped nothing came out) and so decided to wean. He loved nursing, and we talked a lot not having “milky” anymore and that if he felt like that’s what he needed, he could have a hug, or some snuggle time…he did fairly well…although I know it is missed. It was a big comfort for him, as he is somewhat spirited and I often called nursing my “reset” button for him. He was understanding, but misses it.
Here’s my current issue, since weaning, he continually puts his hand in my shirt, on "his" "milkly”. When we are in public, I gently move his hand out of my shirt as I do sometimes at home. It is a real habit for him. When he wakes up in the night, he’ll scoot over and instinctively place his hand there, as he does when he is hurt, or upset.
The other day, I was helping him through a tantrum when finally he came to me and laid down on my lap. I was wearing a v-neck and he snuggled up. The next thing he said, excitedly, was, “Mommy! You have milk in there again.” I said, “No honey, there’s no more milk.” He said, “But I can smell the milk. It smells so nice” I explained that he was remembering what it was like when he used to nurse…
Anyway, when is enough, enough? My main concern is that he grows up and remembers doing that and is disgusted or weirded out by it. And, I would rather he not do it, but don’t want to traumatize him, as it seems to be a great source of comfort.
Anyone have any thoughts or suggestions? When should I just not allow it? How do I not allow it? Is this behavior ok? Normal?
Thank you for your thoughts.
I weaned my ds, just 4, at 3.5…not really his decision, more so mine. I started night weaning him (he was still nursing every 2 hours or so at night…) and then I had surgery and became paranoid that I wouldn’t be able to pump and dump all the junk I had in my system from the surgery (when I pumped nothing came out) and so decided to wean. He loved nursing, and we talked a lot not having “milky” anymore and that if he felt like that’s what he needed, he could have a hug, or some snuggle time…he did fairly well…although I know it is missed. It was a big comfort for him, as he is somewhat spirited and I often called nursing my “reset” button for him. He was understanding, but misses it.
Here’s my current issue, since weaning, he continually puts his hand in my shirt, on "his" "milkly”. When we are in public, I gently move his hand out of my shirt as I do sometimes at home. It is a real habit for him. When he wakes up in the night, he’ll scoot over and instinctively place his hand there, as he does when he is hurt, or upset.
The other day, I was helping him through a tantrum when finally he came to me and laid down on my lap. I was wearing a v-neck and he snuggled up. The next thing he said, excitedly, was, “Mommy! You have milk in there again.” I said, “No honey, there’s no more milk.” He said, “But I can smell the milk. It smells so nice” I explained that he was remembering what it was like when he used to nurse…
Anyway, when is enough, enough? My main concern is that he grows up and remembers doing that and is disgusted or weirded out by it. And, I would rather he not do it, but don’t want to traumatize him, as it seems to be a great source of comfort.
Anyone have any thoughts or suggestions? When should I just not allow it? How do I not allow it? Is this behavior ok? Normal?
Thank you for your thoughts.
)
... I dont think there is anything at all unusual or abnormal about him wanting to touch/cuddle with Mama's breasts, as pp said, its obviously a huge source of comfort for him, and has been for pretty much his whole life!
