how to get a 4 year old out

[mom2emnbec]

I know everyone says a child will leave your bed when they're ready and I have always had that happen until now. My 1st needed more bed at 5 mo old, my 2nd didn't like to be too close while sleeping starting at 11 mo old, my 3 yr old prefers peace while he's sleeping so had to be moved to the cosleeper at 4 mo and was in his bed at 2, I only waited so long with him b/c I hated to move him out and leave his older sister still cosleeping, it just seemed right that the older child move out first lol.

Anyway the problem is the 4 yr old (almost 5), I mean I am beginning to think she's the one that won't ever be ready. And the only gentle way I have heard of is gradually moving them c loser to the door, etc but this child doesn't even like to sleep in her sidecar, she is like a magnet, she attaches to the nearest warm body, when we're not there she scoots over and snuggles her sister, as soon as daddy moves her to the sidecar he climbs in bed and she attaches herself to his arm or back lol. if I go to bed before him she scoots all the way across the bed. When he gets up in the morning she tries to climb overt her sister, half asleep and wedge herself between her sister and I (why she doesnt go to the other side of me I guess is b/c shes half asleep). so we really need to find a way to get her to be able to sleep without a warm body.

the other issue is she has a fear of windows, we have no idea why and what to do about it for a child so young. we dont have a windowless room for her to sleep in.

[almadianna]

Is it causing any issues for her to continue in your bed?

[onyxravnos]

i agree with the PP

but also some thoughts - perhaps heavy drapes for the windows? and perhaps she could cosleep with a sister or brother ?

[meemee]

does your dd have anxiety?

its the age of irrational fears so trying to figure out the why behind the windows - you might not have an answer.

if you suspect she has anxiety - not full blown but just enough to give her tummy aches or headaches once in a while - then sleeping with a warm body is sort of therapeutic for her.

i am writing this as my 7 year old is in bed with me.

if your 3 year old requires space to sprawl out i am not sure if putting them together in their room will work either.

i remember as a kid i hated sleeping alone. when we were moved to our own room together i remember latching onto my brother.

[mom2emnbec]

yes there are some issues, her snuggling to anything keeps her waking up others in the bed, the baby being the worst and our bed is too full so her in her own bed would be beneficial. she wont seem to cosleep with a younger sibling (her 3 yo old brother) even though she will snuggle them when in my bed already asleep and the older siblings have school in the am. she wouldnt be in her own room, she shares with her younger brother who sleeps fine in his bed. she has heavy, colorful, velour drapes now and doesnt appear to have any other anxiety but this, it is a full blown freak out fear. it has been an issue for a while so I have lost hope that she'll just outgrow it on her own 1 day. if I could even get her to just stay sleeping alone in her sidecar it would be helpful or at least a step toward something