Gifted child guidence

[Encinalien]

I'm moving one post here to keep from getting the two issues confused.
http://www.stephanietolan.com/gifted_ex-child.htm

Hey look at this. *You might have already seen it. *I'm probably the only one in ptgc that hasn't googled iq, ruffs score, etc yet. *But this link was off the ruf's score page. *It's what I was looking for in a community. When it was describing the bliss in a community of genuises
"Socially, the experience of gifted adults can be diverse. Those who have chosen a career path that puts them into contact with other gifted adults may regularly experience the joy and excitement of the intellectual synergy that occurs in such a group. In person or on computer networks these people build on each other's ideas, moving with great, exhilarating leaps through complex intellectual realms. There can be a sense of almost magical connection as the ideas flow from one to another, seeming to take on a life of their own. When unusually capable minds are working together there is a powerful sense of community and belonging."
*I've experienced it IRL, but with gifted delinquents. *I want to replicate the experience with gifted mothers now. *And it's exactly what I was describing that I wanted to provide for ds, which was why I was excited to discover that "genuis school" in the first place. *For exactly that very experience for him. *

[Encinalien]

Because my thing is we don't live in the land of oppertunity, somewhere like LA where there's plenty of oppertunities for gifted kids to explore. Otherwise I could sit back and be much less involved in how ds turns out. I live in south Texas the school in town goes up to fourth grade, after that the kids are bussed half hour away to theschool at another little nearby ranch town. Education does not seem to me to be especially "prized" around here. Actually it looks to me like parents around here brag as much in public about their teenagers getting each other pregnant at least as much as, if not more, than kids graduating hs. The town has pop 620. The town had eight highschool age girls pregnant this year alone. I was at a bar-b-que where a whole extended local family were bragging proudly that one of the teenage boys was a "papa" again, for the second time and he was parading around the bar-b-que proudly showing off a beautiful pregnant teenage mom on his arm (according to his proud family, the second one he's knocked up in his life already)
so THIS is why I would raise my son differently if he was gifted or "normal". In one case let him make his own way, it's not such a bad life here. Many people are born, raised, and die here because they're content with it.
I mean, I wanted to talk about it ya know myparenting theories, which really aren't that far-fetched. Since I read ptgc yesterday and found out so many mamas "hanging out" have kids under four I'm inclined to believe starting to think these things through when my son is two isn't quite as pre-mature as previously stated. Colon Capital O.

[Encinalien]

Srry. This might be in the wrong place. But I have to keep bumping it until the right people see it.

[Encinalien]

Actually, how do you move a thread? Because this one probably belongs in "finding your tribe since I'm trying to reach out to make a connection, not trying to correct a behavior.

[Miss Information]

Did you try starting a similar thread in learning at school? What I'm thinking is that you are concerned about your educational options for your son. It's not bad to start thinking about them now.

As for me, we have gifted girls, but not profoundly gifted girls...one maybe one level 2-3 gifted, one maybe level 3-4 gifted (if I recall correctly how Ruf scores things).

I'm kind of glad I don't have genius kids, because I would be hard pressed to figure out how to provide for their needs, since we only have one income and can't afford private schools.

But, that being said, I do use my own gifts and talents to teach them things at home (mostly science experiments) and have some materials for them to use at home.

I think I'm doing a pretty good job of giving them some new things to learn/explore at home.

[physmom]

So after reading your first post the thing that popped into my head was the Manhattan project. There you had a lot of synenergy going on and look what it led to...

Seriously, though, I work in basically the exact environment you described (I'm a scientist and I can honestly say the vast majority of people I work with are gifted adults) and it's basically like herding cats! You just have so many different ideas floating around that instead of beautiful synenergy you get a lot of bickering, rivalries, jealousies, and backstabbing. Sure it can really fun at time, if you enjoy debating and can look past a lot of the craziness but it's definitely no Utopian environment.

What I'm trying to say is that there's no perfect environment. That's life. Rather you need to teach your son how to deal with the hurdles to overcome whatever environment he's in. Sure, there are DEFINITELY some environments that are better than others and any good parent would want to try and find the best environment for their kid but at some point you have to also deal with what your given.

[Encinalien]

That's why I'm open to the idea of making a permanant life here too. The taxes are cheap. Everybody's so friendly, like you said in the other thread we have a long time to ponder this.
The thing about the grade skipping is that the school here only goes to fourth grade. I guess I was getting ahead of myself worrying about it when they told me they don't let kids go to pre-k if they already know their abc's.
The town has already taken us and included us. We get invited to many school functions because it's a close-knit town. They make up excuses. They let me judge the Halloween costume contest so my toddler had an excuse to go to the school Halloween dance.

The concern with skipping is that dh wants ds immersed in the local culture for at least a large chunk of his childhood because it's his families culture. But at the same time dh, my family, my neighbors, everyone's telling me I should keep teaching my son as long as he keeps wanting to learn.

Well, like you said. We have lots of time ahead of us to ponder these things. It's a funny problem, really. How to keep teaching ds to keep up with the pace of his development while making sure he doesn't outpace everybody and have to "skip" out of elementary prematurely and miss out on the culture immersion here.

Yeah and like you said you want to be more child-led and not like your influincing their path to their future too heavily.
Like someone else said, these are new mother worries, and for mothers without other children vying for attention.

Good thinking on your dh's part. Just keep them at home, fed, warm, and safe until they're too old to get in trouble anymore. =p

[Miss Information]

What about instead of pushing him through to learn things faster, extend whatever he learns in school at home. Go for deepening his understanding of topics by getting books and projects for him to do about things he learns in school?

[Encinalien]

My main concern would be that they Might push him to skip kindy and/or first grade, since I already know the won't let any kids in pre-k that know their abc's. will they want him in kindergarten if he doesn't stop learning before then? I've already been told by the other mothers that kids have always got turned away from pre-k for that reason, no exceptions. I'm sure it's lack of resources. What physmom said kind of comforted me about looking for the good around you. They are way more friendly here than they might be in environments with more oppertunities. I know it's a long way off to worry about it yet. Three more years.

The kindy curriculum must be weak, because my neighbor's was there last year and when I showed what I thought was pre-school handwriting she said it was the same lessons they had in the kindergarten here. He's already using scisors accurately, easily. Just one snip. But the kindergarten only wants them to cut a straight line by the END of kindy. I'm less worried about it being a challenge for him as I am of them rejecting him like they already are going to for pre-k.
It's really nothing to worry about. He's healthy, he's happy, and it's a whole three years away. The worst they could is insist he skip, or I could even keep him home. But they'll probably work with me and let him go. I'm worried pre-maturely for nothing.

I'm less worried about him going to school for an education. I'm more interested in him going to school as part of his childhood memories.

[Polliwog]

There's a huge range of typical behavior and abilities so I don't know if your son is gifted or not. And there's a huge range of abilities in kindergarten (or other grade.) The teachers differentiate instruction so that individual needs are met.

You son isn't being rejected from Pre-K. The programs are often funded to accept children who are at risk for academic delays. Your child isn't at risk for those so those slots go to other children. It's not a personal affront. Slots are limited.

You said,

The concern with skipping is that dh wants ds immersed in the local culture for at least a large chunk of his childhood because it's his families culture. But at the same time dh, my family, my neighbors, everyone's telling me I should keep teaching my son as long as he keeps wanting to learn.

Why do you think that cultural immersion and learning are mutually exclusive?

[Encinalien]

Oh. I didn't know that. So I was thinking pre-k was part of school nowadays. I didn't know it was extra. You just took away my need to worry needlessly that if the teachers were rejecting him from pre-k they might "reject" him from other grades. Thank's for telling me they're not "rejecting" him and that pre-k is a suplementary program designed to meet a spefic need. You can just imagine how I felt when a few women told me "they don't let kids go to pre-k if they know their abc's. Everybody treats it like it's part of school and everybody's gone except for two kids in the last several years. You just took a huge worry off of my mind. I totally misunderstood what pre-k was for.

The "cultural immersion" thing. We're already involved in the community and all our family and friends (but me- a transplant) are bilingual. The neighborhood kids mostly speak English but understand Spanish. The parents and family speak to them in Spanish. He's already making friends, he's already accepted by the kids. But I don't know Spanish. Some friends and family speak to him in Spanish to make sure he knows it (it's important around here). And I've heard when they get to school several of the kids use Spanish, even though they understand English.
There's a very local culture and I don't want him to miss out going to school for that reason. He's social enough to find his own place among his class. I'm glad I was wrong thinking pre-k was part of school and that "rejecting" him from pre-k just because he's a little bit ahead meant he might be "rejected" from kindy since he'll still be a little bit ahead. And that's when the local kids really get thrown in togeather, even though the use different languages at home. I didn't want him to miss out on that.

Thanks again. Knowing the truth about pre-k has helped me out immensely.

[Polliwog]

Very few places have Universal Pre-K programs where everyone who is age-eligible will get to go. Many places have Pre-K programs that are based in public schools but have different eligibility criteria. When slots are really limited, or there are specific funding requirements, they often give slots to children who really need the extra year of school to be successful in a typical kindergarten program. It sounds based on all of your threads that many/most children in your area fit into that category.

[Encinalien]

Yeah. Thanks. I really didn't know that. And it really did bother me a little bit. Really, just knowing has returned helped return my overall optimistic outlook. I was thinking it wasn't a huge problem, but it was causing a little bit of unnecessary worrying, jumping to conclusions, etc...
I was thinking the town is so friendly, surely they'll let ds go to elementary school with the other kids, even if he's ahead if them. If I just talked them and talked to him about behaving himself in class. But it's a load off of my . Thank you.
Dh has even talked to me about helping the school help the other kids so that I can help be a benefit to the whole town's education. I think it's a good idea. I've already got involved with one board in town to help contribute to the town's advancement. (I just started with them.) They're a local board trying to preserve and advance "the arts" here in town. It's nice to get involved. It's nice they invited me to be involved.
I was wandering about Something along those lines. I bought Hooked on Phonix series because it was on clearance at the mall. The video game is so user-friendly my two year old uses it on his own and it has taught him stuff. I know you're not supposed to download it on other people's computers. I know it's not for "commercial use". But I've wishfully thought about having a "HOP" workshop every day at the "Hecho" building that that arts board owns. They have a row of computers (those old things) that is hooked up to the Internet. They let the kids come in once a week to use the Internet (most people here have computers but some don't). If i could do something as simple as show up once a week and watch the kids play the HOP game I'd do that much to help the kids out. Has anyone done anything like that? How should I approach HOP owners for permission? I would want something like that that the kids just come in, no arguing about "stay on this website only" because it's an offline program. I wouldn't want a bunch of kids using my computer.

[Encinalien]

With that last post you can knock that "gifted" off the title of this thread since now I asked how to help out the kids in town. So the thread us "child guidence" now. :-)