Teen Mom - Page 5

[mommy68]

Farrah finally figured out that it's much easier at home than it would be out on her own I think. The way she told her mom not to bother her early in the morning was so rude. I'd love it if someone got my baby at 5am and fed her once in a while. lol.

Amber..ugh. She hasn't changed. Maybe if she would stop being so selfish and rude to Gary she would see that now that the baby is in daycare and she and Gary both have jobs that it just might be easier for her now. She's odd, very odd. She said she didn't want to have her daughter see them act the way her own parents did and she's not doing anything to prevent it herself.

Maci is crazy for staying with Ryan. He is such an a$$hat. I'm thinking parts of this show are rehearsed or else he is a real deadbeat of a father. He has no job and never takes care of his own son so his girlfriend can go to college and he had the gall to call HER lazy?? He's the laziest person I've ever seen, IF it's for real.

Catelynn and Tyler. I don't know if I agree with them getting engaged. I think Tyler is just afraid he is going to lose Catelynn so he is going to ask her to marry him. I think they should live their lives and what happens will happen. If it's meant to be then it will be.

I can't believe next week is the final episode for the season. I wonder if they will continue to show these girls once the new 16 and Pregnant airs in February?

[mommy68]

Originally Posted by brymommy

I really hope Bently going to daycare will help her with collage.

But why didn't Ryan step up to the plate and offer to watch Bentley all day? He hasn't mentioned having a fulltime job or going to college. What the heck is he doing all day long that he can't watch his own child while Maci goes to school and work? I think it's sad quite frankly. He's so tired all the freaking time and lays around like a dork. Ryan seriously acts like most 13 yr old boys act. He needs to grow up. I can't believe his parents haven't beat that in to his head yet. But then again I have two neices that had babies quite young and their boyfriends also sit at home all day while they both work and they do nothing but sleep and hang out all night with friends. Kids just aren't mature these days like they used to be.

Originally Posted by brymommy

I actually have a really hard time grasping this whole "young/teen" mom stigma. it has only been in the last 50 years or so that people really waited to get married. I think people are trying to keep kids "young" longer and I just don't get it. A 17/18/19 year old is an adult. Maybe a young adult but an adult. And nature dictates when we get our menses and hormones. And nature hasn't shifted that to a later date just because we live longer.

I disagree with you. I think some young mothers are still very immature just as some older moms can't hack parenting very well. I personally see young mothers all the time IRL that jerk their kids around and talk very mean to them in public (ex. stores, restaurants) and it bugs me to no end. They have very little patience and seem so stressed that the baby just won't do what they "want" it to when they want them to do it. Some young moms just don't get that a baby is a baby and totally needy. So I disagree that we are supposed to have kids at a young age just because we get our periods. That's just wrong. It takes a man and woman to make a baby and I feel two people should be involved in the raising of a child (especially a baby) and that's coming from someone who was a single mom with her first child.

[Starr]

I haven't seen last nights episode but I know the show where Amber brought Leah to daycare- don't get me wrong it IS hard to not be with them. But at the same time I was thinking good for Leah to be with adults who don't yell and play with other kids and get the stimulation. When they show her with Amber she is either playing on the bed or in a playpen. She looked excited to be somewhere new with toys and other little kids.

[delightedbutterfly]

Originally Posted by mommy68

But why didn't Ryan step up to the plate and offer to watch Bentley all day? He hasn't mentioned having a fulltime job or going to college. What the heck is he doing all day long that he can't watch his own child while Maci goes to school and work? I think it's sad quite frankly. He's so tired all the freaking time and lays around like a dork. Ryan seriously acts like most 13 yr old boys act. He needs to grow up. I can't believe his parents haven't beat that in to his head yet. But then again I have two neices that had babies quite young and their boyfriends also sit at home all day while they both work and they do nothing but sleep and hang out all night with friends. Kids just aren't mature these days like they used to be.

Oh I totally think he should have stepped up. Completely. It just doesn't look like it is going to. I just hope that somehow she is able to make collage work because she seems to want that very much.

Originally Posted by mommy68

I disagree with you. I think some young mothers are still very immature just as some older moms can't hack parenting very well. I personally see young mothers all the time IRL that jerk their kids around and talk very mean to them in public (ex. stores, restaurants) and it bugs me to no end. They have very little patience and seem so stressed that the baby just won't do what they "want" it to when they want them to do it. Some young moms just don't get that a baby is a baby and totally needy. So I disagree that we are supposed to have kids at a young age just because we get our periods. That's just wrong. It takes a man and woman to make a baby and I feel two people should be involved in the raising of a child (especially a baby) and that's coming from someone who was a single mom with her first child.

I don't think that we are supposed to have kids at a young age just because we get our periods. But your last line in the previous quote "Kids just aren't mature these days like they used to be." is what I am getting at. Instead of raising our children to become capable adults we are "excusing" their behaviour because "they are young" "they don't know any better".

And I think it takes more than two people. I do think it takes a village. A couple (I don't think it needs to be man and woman) to take on the responsiblity of a baby/child together of course is ideal. But I think that is off the point. As I said in my first post the "men" are there. Are all of them acting how they "should", no maybe not, but if you go check out Parents as Partners there are just as many "grown adult" men whom take the same attitude.

Just as I have seen more "older" moms jerking their kids around and talking mean to them in public. In fact I have seen the "younger" moms be the more gentle and accomodating of the group. But maybe that is just different geography and societial norms.

But *MY* biggest problem is that society is stigmatising this whole "teen mom" thing. Mom's of all ages have the same problems. Woman of all ages consider abortion for unplanned pregnancies, woman of all ages choose adoption, woman of all ages have great partners in parenting and woman of all ages have horrible partners in parenting. The themes are the same. The only difference I see is the way younger moms are stigmatised. And I think it sucks. It is ageism at it's best. I think the biggest problem facing these moms (yes they all have their own stuff they have to work through but we all do) is that they have the added problem of being judged because of their age.

I was talking to a friend today and we were talking about violence and kids watching more violent tv or shows or sports and I said it seems sad but society seems more ok with violence than they do with sex/romance/love and that just seems backwards. And it made me think of this. I guess my whole point is kind of a tangent but I think it might help some of these parents on Teen Mom to not have that added judgement of age, if (in the example of Farrah) she stopped looking at what her idea of "teenage" should be doing and instead look at what a "mom" should be doing.

[darcytrue]

Originally Posted by brymommy

I was talking to a friend today and we were talking about violence and kids watching more violent tv or shows or sports and I said it seems sad but society seems more ok with violence than they do with sex/romance/love and that just seems backwards. And it made me think of this. I guess my whole point is kind of a tangent but I think it might help some of these parents on Teen Mom to not have that added judgement of age, if (in the example of Farrah) she stopped looking at what her idea of "teenage" should be doing and instead look at what a "mom" should be doing.

I agree with you on this.

I only watch MTV channel for Teen Mom. The rest of the stuff on that channel completely disturbs me and scares me that our children are watching some of the crap on there. I see more and more kids disrespecting their parents and other elders and there is a show on MTV that has parents picking dates for their children and it's really terrible how the kids disrespect their parents on that show.

[Starr]

I just watche dthis weeks episode- a couple of things.

Why in the world would Amber get an apartment BEFORE she has a job? I mean she is going from not working at all and relying on Gary for everything to thinking she can handle rent, utilities, phone... and she had nothing lined up. It was lucky for her she got it but it would be interesting to see her in the next few months and how it all pans out. Alsoher and Gary could really benefit from counseling. She isn't doing him any favors when she tells him she loves him but doesn't want to be by him. I think its very confusing for him and he is tryinig to realize they are not together.

Maci is my favorite, she is such a mom. Ryan was acting very very strange on the porch during their convesation. Honestly I hope he isn't doing drugs because thats how he acted. Its so cute to see how big Bentley is and walking all over.

Farrah, I loved her looking at apartments? None of them were really apartemnts but more like roommates. I'm glad she realized that she does have a lot to be thankful for at her home. Not saying her mom is the greatest but it seems they pay for alot and take care of Sophia too.

It would be fun to switch the girls for like 3 days or something and make Farrah see what its like to be Amber and how she struggles for the basics. And then have Amber see how much help Farrah gets at her home. Also have Maci see what its like to have a guy like Tyler who is so mature.

[FoxintheSnow]

I feel like Ive been judging Amber harshly in my mind but then it dawned on me that she has very little help. Maci and Farrah have constant support and help from parents and get to live in really nice homes. Amber doesn't have that. We saw how her father lived. Maci may not get much help from Ryan but she does get tons from her parents and in laws.

[Pepper44]

Originally Posted by FoxintheSnow

I feel like Ive been judging Amber harshly in my mind but then it dawned on me that she has very little help. Maci and Farrah have constant support and help from parents and get to live in really nice homes. Amber doesn't have that. We saw how her father lived. Maci may not get much help from Ryan but she does get tons from her parents and in laws.

That is true about Amber, I feel sorry for her since she has no support. Didn't she have a mom during the 16 and pregnant show? I'm confused about where everyone went.

The thing about Amber that I can't stand is her tone of voice. Like when she calls Gary to ask a simple question she is already raising the tone of her voice so she sounds like she's angry/hysterical/whining. If she could just talk in an even, calm tone of voice everything would be so much better!

I missed the part about Farrah looking at apartments, I have no idea how I missed it!

If my DH accused me of being lazy like Maci's boyfriend did, when he does absolutely nothing himself, I would have completely lost it. COMPLETELY. How can she just sit there and take that? I wanted to reach through the screen and throttle him myself! I also don't get why his parents don't force him to step up instead of enabling him, because they seem so interested in Maci and Ryan's relationship and they look like they absolutely love Bentley. I guess they're in a tough spot of leaving Maci and Bentley on their own or taking care of them since their son won't...

I didn't know there was a new season of 16 and Pregnant coming up! I wonder if they will continue with these moms in next season's Teen Mom. I would be sad if we never get to find out what happens with them.

[Pepper44]

Originally Posted by darcytrue

I agree with you on this.

I only watch MTV channel for Teen Mom. The rest of the stuff on that channel completely disturbs me and scares me that our children are watching some of the crap on there. I see more and more kids disrespecting their parents and other elders and there is a show on MTV that has parents picking dates for their children and it's really terrible how the kids disrespect their parents on that show.

This show is the only one I watch on MTV too. The rest of the stuff on there is so terrible!

[AmandasMom]

Catelynn and Tyler compliment each other and I think they have a real chance of making it work. I really like how Tyler is so tuned in to everything she says and listens to what she is saying. I think there is a very old soul in that very young man.

I like True Life on MTV, too.

[SeattleRain]

Originally Posted by brymommy

I actually have a really hard time grasping this whole "young/teen" mom stigma. it has only been in the last 50 years or so that people really waited to get married. I think people are trying to keep kids "young" longer and I just don't get it. A 17/18/19 year old is an adult. Maybe a young adult but an adult. And nature dictates when we get our menses and hormones. And nature hasn't shifted that to a later date just because we live longer.

Sure there are challanges being a young mom, but there are challenges being an older mom and a single mom and a single dad and and and... Maybe that is why I like this show. It puts it out there.

It shows what it is like to be a MOM. I know just as many 30 somethings whom are trying to juggle childcare and school and work and a less than supportive husband.

And it also seems typical of the dads. Only one is out of the picture (and the reasons behind that are unknown), one is there but not really. One is wanting to be there but the relationship dynamic is having problems (and IME most do that first year of having a first baby) and the last is there and would be a FANTASTIC father, is a fantastic father and will be a fantastic father.

It just seems more like normal life and normal parenting dynamics rather than "teen" parenting.

I work with teens for a living and I can say that being a teen today is VERY different than being a teen 50 years ago. For one thing, not graduating high school is a much bigger deal today than it was 50 years ago (graduating high school is often impossible once you get pregnant that young). You can't join the military without graduating high school, you can barely find a job pumping gas without graduating high school, and you can't get a job at many retailers without graduating high school. Those that do graduate high school rarely go on to college like the vast majority of their peers so they have a much lower chance of being financially successful. In short, the economics have changed. Preventing teen pregnancy is giving girls (and the boys who support them... when they support them) a better chance at being successful, independant women, let alone successful and independant mothers.

Shows like this are extremely important in showing teens what motherhood really looks like. I don't totally agree that teen girls should be stigmatized, but you're wrong to believe they're totally adults. They can be impulsive and they can make decisions for the wrong reasons without thinking fully about the long term consequences. I think the fact that this show portrays the teens as having hardships BECAUSE of their kids counters the kinds of shows teens are watching that shows sex without consequences.

[darcytrue]

Originally Posted by SeattleRain

I work with teens for a living and I can say that being a teen today is VERY different than being a teen 50 years ago. For one thing, not graduating high school is a much bigger deal today than it was 50 years ago (graduating high school is often impossible once you get pregnant that young). You can't join the military without graduating high school, you can barely find a job pumping gas without graduating high school, and you can't get a job at many retailers without graduating high school. Those that do graduate high school rarely go on to college like the vast majority of their peers so they have a much lower chance of being financially successful. In short, the economics have changed. Preventing teen pregnancy is giving girls (and the boys who support them... when they support them) a better chance at being successful, independant women, let alone successful and independant mothers.

50 years? I'd say teens are different than they were even 20 years ago. I disagree with it being hard to get jobs. I encounter teenagers in my area everywhere from drug stores to restaurants (not just fast food) to grocery stores...so they definitely have options. They take jobs that others can't take due to low pay. My neice even works part-time for a vet office as an assistant and she's only 16. The jobs are there, kids are just lazier these days and expect to win millions on American Idol and stuff or they just expect to make a huge income by doing nothing pretty much. And I also attend community college myself and there are lots of new students each fall that just graduated the year before and most of the comm colleges in our state offer early and middle college so kids can get a jump start on college credits in high school - so the options are certainly there! Much better than they were even in the 80's IMHO. I just feel kids are lazier these days. I have several teenaged and 20-something neices and nephews and they are all pretty much lazy. They complain soooo much and expect the world to be handed to them.

[Shy0717]

Who's watching the season finale??

[Livviesmom0207]

OMG I loved Tyler's speech before he proposed. Those kids are wise beyond their years.

Love it.

[lilmom]

Season Finale thoughts:

Once again I cried..

Maci..absolutely heartbreaking. I really feel for her. Ryan will not change. Ryan is beyond spoiled, he's abusive, IMO..and my heart was breaking for her, and for Bentley. I know she wants Bentley to have a daddy, and I hope she will find one for him someday.

Farrah - I was soo proud of her. She has really grown. Seems like she was really enjoying Sophia.

Amber - Ugh. I was really feeling for Gary too tonight. He clearly loves her and Leah. He has his faults but I just don't get how Amber doesn't see that SHE seems to be the one instigating so much of the fighting when they are together. She expects him to buy everything for her. I am not saying he shouldn't take care of his child but she expects him to pay for everything if he is around, as if they were together..but she doesn't want to be together!
I feel like she is constantly pushing him..testing him almost. I hope it gets better. Gary was breaking my heart too.

Catelynn & Tyler - Tyler is just precious. His proposal was so sweet. Every time I see him I wish I could hug him. I really think they can make it. And I was happy to see them getting a little more at peace with the whole adoption thing.

So, is the Teen Mom Finale Special going to be it? These girls aren't coming back again? Will it just rotate to 16 & Pregnant and then a Teen Mom with those girls after that?

I hope somehow we can find out what happens with all these Teen Moms and their little ones. The babies are so cute.

[LavenderMae]

that to everything you wrote, lilmom!

Tyler purposing had me in tears. They are more mature and more partners to each other than most adults I know. And I can't help but think how they would have been good parents. I wish it didn't have to be the way it is and there could have been a third option for them. I still get no warm fuzzies about their baby being adopted or the aboptive mom saying what a gift they gave her. I do realize that Catelynn and Tyler did the best they could for their daughter and it took a lot of strength, they are pretty amazing people. But it shouldn't have to be that way.

I was also crying at Macy's story, she just wants what's best for her son and it's a damn shame that Ryan can't be that. I agree he's abusive and I hope Macy can move on and make peace with it. I don't think I can say much more about Ryan with out violating the UA. Macy is a good mom and I think she and Bentley will be just fine!

[mandib50]

i felt bad for maci too. i would have liked to have seen her and ryan work out, but he is just not healthy for her or bentley. wasn't that terrible in the restaurant when ryan was with his friends and was so mean about maci. bentley is so adorable too, what a cutie!

i love how farrah has grown also, she seems happier.

amber, i'm not sure why she has to scream/nag/whine/put him down at gary everytime she sees him. i don't think he's all that terrible of a dad/boyfriend. i feel sad for amber too, i think there are a lot of issues at play, which makes it worse.

ty and catelyn .... soooo cute. i think they have a good shot at having a loving, happy marriage.

[WonderWild]

I haven't watched it all yet but as for the Amber/Gary thing...she is very high strung and does make a big deal about everything. But Gary....why wasn't he ready to take his child when she was ON HER WAY TO WORK. It's like he was trying to make her late. That was very insensitive of him.

[Pepper44]

I just watched the last episode.

Ryan makes me so angry! I can't believe he told his friends that Maci's a b****. I don't understand what he thinks his role should be or why he doesn't seem to love his son.

Maci deserves way better, Bentley too.

Farrah seemed like she was growing up a lot!

Tyler and Catelynn, ah I just love them. I hope they live happily ever after.

Amber...I'm shocked she's doing so well on her own, in her own place. Her whining still drives me crazy, especially how it's constantly directed towards Gary. But even Amber seemed like she was holding her own alright in this episode!

I hope we get to find out how they are all doing in the future...

[KMK_Mama]

Tyler's proposal had me in tears....they are so good for each other.

I can't stand Amber. She is way too hard on him....I mean, I think he needs to step up to the plate a little more but she is so whiny about it and never gives him a break...irk.