You don't get a medal for EC - Page 2

[physmom]

I always liked the idea of early potty training and I knew that I was potty trained by the time I was 1 (so was DH) so EC came rather natural to us. Plus, ever since DD was a newborn she seemed very aware of when she would got to the bathroom and would even wait until I had to diaper off to poop/pee. She always hated going in her diaper. I tried occasionally when she was really little but she hatted her potty so I waited until she was 9 months and mostly started taking her for her pees after she woke up and when it was obvious that she was pooping. She caught on and now we only have a couple of misses a day.

We picked 9 months to start because it just didn't natural to me how many screaming fests she had when we did diaper changes. I just couldn't deal with it anymore and told her if she didn't like it she'd have to use the toilet. I guess she listened!!!

[hrsmom]

physmom- good point about the screaming during diaper changes! We have had very few diaper struggles. Since we EC, if there have been times I've wanted to put on a diaper and she strongly resisted, then I just didn't put it on her right then and it was ok!

JessieBird- it is fun (most of the time, my own fault when it isn't!) and it definitely is great for bonding. Not to mention appropriately responding to their wiggles, cries, and squirms when they're little. That "don't be such a martyr" comment is so strange, but I get those vibes too and in our case (at the age my dd is) get told that I "hold her more than most moms." I feel like we're not supposed to let these children impact our lives at all, but the reality is that they DO!! In a good way, really. I guess this thread is about why we EC and not negative attitudes towards natural parenting, but still...!!!

[Daffodil]

I liked the idea of using fewer diapers, but mostly I felt like when it came to using the toilet, earlier would be better than later. And when I read that there was a gentle, natural way for it to happen really early, it made sense to give it a try.

Once I tried it, I found I liked the way it put me more in touch with everything that was going on with my baby. Now what happened in her diaper wasn't just a black box anymore - I actually knew how often she peed, and how much, and that sometimes when she fussed it was because she had just peed in her diaper. I think most parents have the attitude my sister said she and her husband had when their boys were babies - they felt like a naked baby was a dangerous baby, and they were nervous any time the baby didn't have a diaper on, because they never knew when he might pee or poop. It seems kind of weird and said to me now to be that out of touch with your baby's elimination patterns. I wasn't one of those moms who are so super in tune with their babies, or whose babies signal so clearly, that we hardly ever had accidents. But, still, even with hard-to-EC DS, there were plenty of times when I knew I didn't have to worry about him peeing right then, especially if I was carrying him.

I also liked the way I never had to decide whether or not to start potty training, or come up with any kind of potty training plan, or get my kid to buy into it. We just kept doing what we'd been doing all along, and it kept working better and better.

And I liked being able to avoid fighting with my toddlers over diaper changes, and not having to find a suitable changing area when we were out and about. It's no fun laying your squirmy baby on a pad on a dirty restroom floor for a diaper change, or trying to change her in the back of the car on a cold winter day. And once my babies were about 9 months old, I found pulling underpants on and off was a zillion times easier than doing anything involving fasteners or having to lay the baby down.

[Shazer]

Originally Posted by GoldmanBaby09

I just think it is interesting how people feel about EC. So much of what gets hotly debated on the MDC is medical related--birth interventions, c-sections, circumcision, vaccinations. All those things can affect the health or safety of mother and/or baby, and there can be risks and benefits to each. But EC isn't like that. Is your child going to be hurt if you don't EC? Certainly not. Does it make you a bad parent for not doing it? No way!

I disagree that EC isn't healthier for your child. Emotionally, I believe it is much better to pay attention to your child than to ignore cues and teach your child to withstand a soiled or dirty feeling. Physically, keeping waste away from precious skin is certainly beneficial. Psychologically, listening and understanding your child has great benefit in your relationship.

Comparing my child's experience with EC to other conventionally potty trained children I know, at 2.5 DD doesn't wet the bed (except when sick or going through a growth spurt), she never has accidents, and she is very confident about using the bathroom. Other kids, because as toddlers they naturally want to exert some power, make "potty training" a big struggle. And it is a big struggle; for their entire lives they've been taught to use diapers as toilets and then parents suddenly say that is unacceptable behavior.

[yamilee21]

Originally Posted by Shazer

... Other kids, because as toddlers they naturally want to exert some power, make "potty training" a big struggle. And it is a big struggle; for their entire lives they've been taught to use diapers as toilets and then parents suddenly say that is unacceptable behavior.

As a three year old with a new baby in the house, using the bathroom/potty became a huge "power struggle" for my son, with whom we had been practicing EC since he was 6 weeks old, and who had "graduated" around 2 1/2. His behaviour was the same as the newly potty-learning three year olds we knew who had not had any EC experience. EC does not prevent all kids from having toileting issues.

[pixiepunk]

no, nothing is a guarantee. but i think for the vast majority of kids, EC prevents potty struggles and provides a smooth transition potty independence - and they choose to exert their independence about other things as willful little beasts... i mean toddlers

sometimes potty issues with the birth of a new sibling are more about regression than they are about exerting independence. both my older two kids chose nursing as their regression of choice when their younger sibling was born. my oldest also wanted to be worn a lot, and my boy wanted to constantly be on my lap. it can also be about attention seeking, and about stress. regardless of whether it's regression or exerting independence or attention seeking or stress, though, it usually still results in some sort of struggle (for me it was having to say "no, sorry, you're not a newborn baby and i just simply can't stay sane and nurse you every 30 minutes!" well... i said that in my head, not actually to the kid ). that transition to a new baby in the house is just always going to have some struggles associated with it, everyone's getting used to a whole new situation. parents included. it takes some time to adjust, and the stress of that adjustment can have some unpleasant side effects.

[zoebird]

new person = new dynamics.

seriously, i think we're staying at one. i like having one. i would probably like having others too, but i like having one.

[hrsmom]

Originally Posted by zoebird

new person = new dynamics.

seriously, i think we're staying at one. i like having one. i would probably like having others too, but i like having one.

I've been thinking along these lines, too! We'll see! Who knows!!!


Another thing about EC is that it maked CDing and really, any kind of diapering, so much easier!!!! My babe was a frequent pooper as a newborn and infant. I used disposable diapers at first, and would have used way more if none of the poops went in a potty! I don't even know if I would have switched over to cloth if it weren't for EC. I'm thinking I probably would have, but not as soon and it would have taken longer to go with only cloth. I'm guessing! I never felt like a 'real' cd-er because of not having to wash that many poopy diapers. (I did get my chance to wash poop-diapers later on, though!)