Recommend a Book About Raising Boys, Please BOOKS - Page 2

[hopefulfaith]

Originally Posted by A&A

The Minds of Boys

I second that one. Very good.

[Pookietooth]

What about Boys Adrift? I see that the author is the founder of an organization that promotes single gender enducation.

[Red Pajama]

Anything by Michael Gurian. This is one of those personally important topics. I taught for years, and at preschool, kindergarten, and various elementary and middle school positions. There's a big difference in boys, and how boys are treated, in school situations. As a mother of two sons, what I saw as a teacher has become much more real to me now.

The link below is to the Gurian institute, which was founded by the author I mentioned above. There's lots of good information there, as well as links to his books, many of which have already been mentioned on this thread.
http://www.gurianinstitute.com/

[Ambishop19]

I recently read Boys Adrift. It was very interesting and thought-provoking. I would recommend it to parents of boys for sure.

[lach]

I thought Raising Cain was okay. It's worth skimming. It started out strong, I thought, and kind of went downhill as the book went on.

I have "The Wonder of Boys" on my pile to read soon: it came well recommended.

I also just bought a book called Pink Brain Blue Brain. It's buy the author of another book that I read a few years ago that I really liked. I've only read the introduction so far, but it struck me. She talked about how 30 years ago there was a real push that gender is totally a social construct, and how that's just not true... but that in accepting that that isn't true, we've gone too far in the opposite direction and that girls and boys are segregated in what they wear, what they play with, and the expectations placed on them more than ever before. I have a son and a daughter and I think I really agree with her, based not so much on my kids (who are still very young) but on the jaw-droppingly sexist things people have said to me about them. Sometimes it makes me feel like the deck is already stacked against them just because of what people expect from them for no other reason than that one has a penis and the other doesn't.

But anyway, I really like this author because she's a neuroscientist, and her books are actually based on research, whereas I think a lot of the other books on this subject are based on conventional wisdom and anecdotes. Which, don't get me wrong, can be VERY helpful and shouldn't be discounted out of hand... it's just nice to have a book that actually says "Okay this study said this, and that study said that, and so we can deduce..."

So even though that wasn't what you were looking for, I thought I'd mention it!

(I guess I'm late to the thread after whatever drama happened, but I wanted to say that I think that my instincts as a mom are actually really good, but I'm a sucker for parenting books. Love them! No clue why, I just really enjoy reading different perspectives and getting new ideas.)

[DaughterOfKali]

Originally Posted by bugginsmom

Another good one along those lines is "The Way of Boys" by Anthony Rao.

I went to one of his talks and a lot of what he said made sense.
I haven't read his book yet.

[not_telling]

Originally Posted by lach

I thought Raising Cain was okay. It's worth skimming. It started out strong, I thought, and kind of went downhill as the book went on.

I have "The Wonder of Boys" on my pile to read soon: it came well recommended.

I also just bought a book called Pink Brain Blue Brain. It's buy the author of another book that I read a few years ago that I really liked. I've only read the introduction so far, but it struck me. She talked about how 30 years ago there was a real push that gender is totally a social construct, and how that's just not true... but that in accepting that that isn't true, we've gone too far in the opposite direction and that girls and boys are segregated in what they wear, what they play with, and the expectations placed on them more than ever before. I have a son and a daughter and I think I really agree with her, based not so much on my kids (who are still very young) but on the jaw-droppingly sexist things people have said to me about them. Sometimes it makes me feel like the deck is already stacked against them just because of what people expect from them for no other reason than that one has a penis and the other doesn't.

But anyway, I really like this author because she's a neuroscientist, and her books are actually based on research, whereas I think a lot of the other books on this subject are based on conventional wisdom and anecdotes. Which, don't get me wrong, can be VERY helpful and shouldn't be discounted out of hand... it's just nice to have a book that actually says "Okay this study said this, and that study said that, and so we can deduce..."

So even though that wasn't what you were looking for, I thought I'd mention it!

(I guess I'm late to the thread after whatever drama happened, but I wanted to say that I think that my instincts as a mom are actually really good, but I'm a sucker for parenting books. Love them! No clue why, I just really enjoy reading different perspectives and getting new ideas.)

Pink Brain Blue Brain is on my "list," so you're really not off in the recommendation. Thanks!

[Holland73]

Originally Posted by elanorh

I very much liked Real Boys (Pollack). I read it in a Early Childhood Development course --- the author is a Harvard prof (I don't remember what, psychology maybe?) and it's based on over 25 years of research of various types that he conducted, as well as referring to other research too IIRC.

He addresses especially the social pressures placed on boys to act like "boys," the strict gender roles they are assigned, and advice on how to help kids negotiate that effectively. I particularly remember a chapter where he talked about how we teach baby boys that their acceptable emotions are anger or happiness, and another about the play that we encourage and discourage for boys (ie, what happens if a boy wants to play with "girl" toys, etc.).

I grew up in a family of all girls, and found this book thought-provoking. If dh and I were to have a son, I would definitely reread this book ASAP.

At the time, I wasn't a parent and had no familiarity with AP parenting etc. but in retrospect, I think his perspective was very child-focused and APish.

I really loved, and learned A LOT, from Real Boys... as both a parent of a boy and an elementary school teacher.