potty learning...is this EC?

[AnniesFam]

I'm embarrassed to admit I don't know much at all about EC, but would love some EC advice!
We've been CD'ing since birth and last week, DS (23.5 mos) just started giving more regular cues, so I ran with it and we have had tremendous (!!) success the last five days for daytime dryness (still crazy soaked overnight in a dipe). We've had minimal accidents and not yet poop, but still! Any tips for a late starter? Do we just stick with what we're doing?

I wish I had been more diligent earlier...ugh!

Lastly, I worry we've made some sort of mistake since DS will only STAND to pee...it is working for us now, but will it work against us in the long run? Anyone had this experience?

[hrsmom]

If you have time to check out a book, the book by Christine Gross Loh gives great advice for starting at different stages. It's called The Diaper Free baby. I think it's great that you're responding to your LO! I wouldn't worry about him only peeing to stand up, but that's just my gut feeling on that one. I have noticed that LOs go through lots of different phases and stages with EC (just like everything else, of course.) Don't worry about the overnight dryness, from what I've read and experienced, daytime and night time dryness happens at different times. It sounds like you're doing great!

[sgmom]

In my opinion, potty learning is a form of EC. Potty TRAINING, is not. Learning to use the potty has to do with learning to read your own body that the need to eliminate is about to happen, then learning an appropriate place to do it.

My views on EC are any type of communication on learning to recognize signals (both you learning to read your child, and teaching your child how to recognize the feeling just before need to eliminate).

Potty training in my opinion, is based much more on rewards and praise for "doing a good job" when they pee in the potty.

When potty training older children/toddlers, most parents will ask their children "do you need to pee", which to me seems quite unfair to the child. Not only are you asking them to tell you if they do or don't (when most kids don't know if they do or don't yet if it's never been taught), but you're giving them the responsibility of where to do it. And if they say no, then pee in their pants ("Oh no, you had an accident! Next time use the potty!), they've made "The wrong choice". An accident in EC is simply a "miss". "Oh look! You pee'd! No biggie! We'll try to get it in the potty again later."

EC is about communication. Plain and simple. You offer the potty at times of high likelyhood (after waking, meals, baths, etc) or when they show you a signal (like a crotch grab, a fart, their body goes stiff and they stand there are stare at you)... These are signs that your child needs to pee. Offering the potty at these times is EC. A sticker chart would be potty training.

But this is just my opinion. Some may disagree.

[JMJ]

IMO, no matter when you help your child learn the potty, the gentle EC techniques are the way to go.

[pixiepunk]

since your LO is a boy and ultimately you'll want him to stand up and pee anyway, i'd just roll with it. if you have any interest in spending money on something, they sell little person sized urinals that i bet he'd love. some even attach to the toilet and can be 'flushed'.

i agree with all the pp's - the cornerstone is communication, and i think that's the best way to PL. i'd add that you might want to bring him with you (and your partner) and talk about what you're doing "i feel like i have to pee. i need to go sit on the potty." etc. it will help him to understand the whole process. it might also be helpful to keep an eye out for his elimination patterns - when does he go (in diaper or in potty) and try to offer at the times most likely for success.

enjoy the process, have fun! and remember that you've been teaching him to go in the diaper for the last 2 years, so it may take a while for him to relearn those sensations and develop the muscle control to get to the potty with regularity. so don't get frustrated if it doesn't happen overnight. it sounds like you're off to a great start!!