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Funny things people say pre-parenthood - Page 4

post #61 of 100
Oh, and even after having my 1st I was overconfident about sleep!

She started STTN all by herself at 12 weeks, and we were in a hotel, no less. So I was just sure that my careful attention to her schedule and needs were what caused that, and when ds1 started STTN at 10 weeks I was patting myself on the back like crazy. I was sure in for a shock when 2 months later he was sleeping in 40 minute stretches, and then crying for an hour or two in between.
post #62 of 100
When my best friend was in her early 20s she was very career minded. By nature she's uptight (she admits to it!) and worries about appearances. She actually said to me "people shouldn't bring their children in public, ever" because they can be uncooth and noisy! Many years later she gave up her career to be a stay at home mom of 2 and laughs at the way she viewed kids before. To boot she's got one incredibly stubborn girl, according to her mom is more stubborn than she was as a toddler - how it comes back to bite you in the end!

I have another friend who thought her friends were being abusive to their baby by swaddling him. She had to go home and google "swaddling" to find out that it's an acceptable (heck, in the case of my kids necessary) parenting skill!
post #63 of 100
My friends just had there first baby.

Through pregnancy, I would offer any help/items/advice I could to help them if they needed it.

I told her that after the baby comes, I would be happy to help her with nursing if she needs it. She said No, ive seen my friend nurse, its natural and easy.

She never breast fed one day out of the hospital, after the babys "rough start", meaning low blood sugar, she just didnt want to force her to latch. Not one day.

They asked about being induced, I said dont do it. They wanted there baby so bad, it didnt matter what cost. Went in to be induced, ended in a csection.

The funniest to me was me telling them in the hospital saturday night that its different when its your own baby. I was 19 when I had the twins, and I called 911 after 2 hours of being home alone. Elizabeth started coughing while I was feeding her a bottle (I was nursing, but of course, the hospital told me I HAD to supplement) and I freaked out, thinking she was choking. Dh called 911, and all the firetrucks in the city showed up for nothing.

My friends told me I probably hadnt been around babies before, that is why I was so nervous. I was 12 when my brother was born, so I was old enough to help and take care of him. I told them, its just different.

Fast forward to the next saturday (last week), middle of the night, decides the baby is breathing funny. Calls MIL and she says calm down, let me come over and assess her. They say we have already assessed her, she needs to go to the ER. They all go, and guess what? Baby is just fine, nothing funny going on. I just had to laugh, because it IS different when it is your own. All the reading, studying, helping in the world cant prepare you for your own.

I said I would NEVER put my kids on a leash, and I happily use one now for my high needs ds.
post #64 of 100
I think the "I would never let my child do _______" and the "My child will never__________because I will be _________kind of parent" are the funniest comments. I laugh at myself everytime my dd does something I said she would never do because they are such silly little things that I really don't care about now that I have an actual kid.
post #65 of 100
Before DS1, I was planning to BF (not a single drop of the EVIL formula) but not co-sleep. DH was adament that we co-sleep so I gave it a try, and thought I would never do it any other way. DD came and yet again it worked well. I love babywearing, never took a stoller anywhere.

Then I got pregnant with twins.

One of them sleeps in a crib. Both are partially formula fed. The stroller is still my best friend and I never managed to wear them on a regular basis.
post #66 of 100
Oh let's see...


there's a 20 y/o that I used to be that said, "Ugh, breastfeeding is disgusting. Why someone would do that in public is beyond me, isn't that what bottles are for?" (oh yes I really did say that). Now I am a die-hard lactivist

and there was the time I said that I couldn't see myself nursing past 1 year, anything after that is just creepy and here I am still nursing my 31 month old

I also thought cloth-diapering was just stupid, now I own my own collection of prefolds, wraps, longies, and wool covers.

I also thought I would never be like my parents. And this was doubly important for me because I came from a very abusive home. And while I can say I am not at all like my parents, I was still taught by them, and the way they parented still runs strong in me, and it is very hard not to do what I was taught. I thought it would be so easy, just do the opposite. It is not that easy.
post #67 of 100
Quote:
Originally Posted by ~Boudicca~ View Post
I also thought I would never be like my parents. And this was doubly important for me because I came from a very abusive home. And while I can say I am not at all like my parents, I was still taught by them, and the way they parented still runs strong in me, and it is very hard not to do what I was taught. I thought it would be so easy, just do the opposite. It is not that easy.
Yep, I do this too. That's when it's not so cute or funny, but just makes you want to tear your freakin' hair out, huh?
post #68 of 100
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fuamami View Post
Yep, I do this too. That's when it's not so cute or funny, but just makes you want to tear your freakin' hair out, huh?
Yeah... I'm glad that you understand.
post #69 of 100
One of my good friends is pregnant. We were discussing traveling with the baby. I told her she would probably be limited for awhile b/c she isn't going to ant to hear the baby scream during a long trip.

Her response was that she put up with a whining, screaming cat on a long trip this year!

I said that she is not biologically linked to the cat and the cats cries do not effect her the same way. Plus, she isn't going to want her baby to be in misery during the trip.. she'll care more about the baby's feelings than the cats.
post #70 of 100
I just had a young, twenty something, childless airline worker ask me why I didn't just drive 10 hours nonstop to my destination. This was after my flight had been cancelled for the third time in three days, due to the east coast snow storm. I was alone with two young kids who were crying their eyes out because they want to see grandma for Christmas. I asked him if he'd ever driven 10 hours nonstop with two screaming children through snow. He replied that he'd driven lots of long trips, but WITHOUT children. I told him then he didn't know what he was talking about.
post #71 of 100
I thought I'd just nurse a year. Ha!

I said I'd never use cloth diapers because it was too much work.

I didn't want the baby in the bed with me.

I'd lose the pregnancy weight or die trying (I just don't even care after I have a baby).

I'd pump so the baby could take a bottle once in a while.
post #72 of 100
Quote:
Originally Posted by bandgeek View Post
I didn't want the baby in the bed with me.

I'd lose the pregnancy weight or die trying (I just don't even care after I have a baby).

I'd pump so the baby could take a bottle once in a while.
ME TOO!!!

Baby is sleeping in my bed all night now & I think it's awesome. We disassembled the crib and he only slept in it 5 minutes total his whole life.

I don't care that I still look 4-5 months pregnant (ok maybe just a little but not enough to do anything about it!) I thought the pregnancy weight would be a huge issue for me!!

And my baby has never once had a bottle!

A few more...

I thought DH & I would have plenty of time to relax together each night after the baby went to bed. Well, baby goes to bed at midnight!!

I thought being a parent was easy. I saw all those cute quiet babies & loved holding and caring for them for a few hours. When I was 12 or so and my aunt adopted her first child, I begged my mom to have another baby -- "I'll take care of him for you, I'll feed him and burp him and change all the diapers, I promise!!!"
post #73 of 100
have a family friend who I love but she is just well...socially ridiculous sometimes and clueless too. Anyway she always says" oh i can relate (to whatever childhood issues etc.) because my boys do xyz
.....well her "boys" are two huge dogs who are agressive and horrible btw. so she always compares her dogs to kids, it drives me INSANEEEEE. Not only that, one day I was talking about something one of my kids had done and she goes "you should spank them" so I go "umm yeah right, do you spank your dogs when they do horrible things(all the time in her case)?" she goes well no...and she shut up after that lol.
post #74 of 100
Quote:
Originally Posted by 2lilsweetfoxes View Post
We are all perfect parents before we have kids. Theoretical children are so sweet and actually mind when you talk to them in a calm manner, don't test you, and meet all developmental milestones right on cue. Real children are human--and they don't read the psychology how-to-raise-good-children book-of-the-day.
Love it!
post #75 of 100
Quote:
Originally Posted by lifeguard View Post
I have made a promise to myself that I will NEVER say to someone "We'll see when you have kids!" as I found that SO hurtful.
I am so with you on this. I'm starting to refuse to discuss any choices i'm making now because of how often people scoff and tell me how i'll change my mind about xyz and about how i don't know what i'm talking about.
post #76 of 100
Quote:
Originally Posted by Catubodua View Post
I am so with you on this. I'm starting to refuse to discuss any choices i'm making now because of how often people scoff and tell me how i'll change my mind about xyz and about how i don't know what i'm talking about.
It also makes it so much harder when we DO end up changing our minds.

I find myself doing a lot of "I'm *hoping* to have a natural birth" and "I'm *hoping* to BF for at least a year" (which I know isn't that long in the MDC scheme of things, but I just can't even think past that right now), and "I'm *hoping* to use cloth diapers *most* of the time."

That said, I HAVE said some pretty stupid things. And I'm sure I'm still thinking stupid things now.

I remember years ago when my friend (and fellow MDC momma) said that she wanted to have her future babies either at home or at a birth center thinking (and maybe saying?) that it was just CRAZY! Babies are born at hospitals, don't you know?

Guess who's having her baby with midwives at the local free standing birth center in April...
post #77 of 100
My childless brother, then about 29, was in town just after the birth of DS1. I wasn't sure if he and my dad were coming for a visit or not, they were sort of being wishy washy about whether they were coming that day. DS fell asleep and I blissfully fell into a deep sleep along with him.

I wake up to my maintinence man letting my dad and brother into my apartment. Apparently they had been trying to call and were knocking and I wasn't answering. My brother goes "What!?? Are you taking sleeping pills?"

"I was like, uh, no, I have a newborn. Unless you are baby crying I am not going to hear you."

IDIOT! Like you would even NEED sleeping pills when you have a newborn.
post #78 of 100
It is really fun to read this thread as someone who is pregnant with my first baby It is making me laugh because I have said and thought some of the things you guys are mentioning!
post #79 of 100
Some of these are really cracking me up.

I can only imagine what some people said about my 'advice' when I wasn't a parent. I'm sure it was AWFUL.

I'm also laughing because I thought all the loony 'advice' people gave me when I was pregnant was such a great idea. Now I'm like "Are you kidding me?!"
post #80 of 100
[QUOTE=anne1140;14817964]Ditto. I've been TTC for over two years, and it's so hard. On another message board I'm on, there was an argument as to whether childless people should be posting on the parenting board. One person said, "If you don't have kids, you haven't earned the right to give advice." That was so hurtful. Did she really do something special to "earn" being a mother? What do I have to do to "earn" it? Because as far as work goes, I'm pretty sure I've put in way more work than her trying to get pregnant!

That's not to say that the things said on here aren't naive. They are. And I am laughing at a lot of them. I'm SURE I will be changing my mind on things. But just because someone doesn't have kids doesn't mean they don't know what they are talking about ever. Even parents say stupid things. A lot. (See *worst parenting advice* thread. ) I absolutely love lurking on the Parenting and Gentle Discipline boards here. I have a library in my house of Attachment Parenting books. From all I've gleaned, I don't have any expectations of how my kids will be, because I have no clue! I can plan to do things like breastfeed, cloth diaper, and co-sleep, though, and I most certainly will not circumcise. My MIL gives me flack all the time, saying, "You'll see." I really hate it, because I'm not just pulling things out of my butt. I've done lots of research, and these things are very important to me. I think it's different in that I am not saying, "This is how it will be," but, "I feel strongly about this, and it's what I would like to do."
QUOTE]

DITTO to all, but especially the bold!!! I'm still TTC my first and I lurk around here a lot. I wish that getting (and staying) pregnant was as easy for me as it seems to be for most ppl I know IRL. And you should have heard the heated debate I had on circumcision with my DH's family.
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