If you change, why do others try SO HARD to shove you back into your previous roll? Why? Why does your changing, for the better, disturb other people so much, that they want to push you back into where you were before? Why? Someone tell me.
I've seen it so many times.
The alcoholic that starts to go to AA and stops drinking, and his girlfriend subtly keeps trying to be the co-dependent, and his buddies not so subtly try to get him back the way he was.
Now it is happening to me. I'm the kind you can push and push until one day you push too hard and I say ENOUGH. My job is awful, I have not had a raise in years, we have had mass firings multiple times and the stress is horrific. So finally I changed it, by 1) forcing my workplace to give me a 4 day work week and 2) changing my own attitude - learning to take breaks, to be calm and not stress out and take too many things on my plate.
For the last week I have been calm, quiet, done my job but not taken on extra work. I have taken time for co-workers instead of just work, work, work. And I work 4 days/week starting january 1.
And yet, some colleagues are visibly mad at me! And these are colleagues that my reduction to 4 days does not affect their workload at all. I am wondering if they are mad because I am changing, and it makes them uncomfortable? Or becase I stood up for myself? Or WTH? When my boss said I could not have a day free, I did not take no for an answer, and insisted. It was that important to me. I knew it carried risks; my boss could have fired me. He said he didn't like it, but would rather have a happy employee for 4 days than an unhappy employee for 5. And now two colleagues are trying to rile me up, stress me out, basically telling me if I asked to go down to 4 days, and my boss said no, that I needed to accept that and if I couldn't, to quit and find another job. They went on and on. Why?
I've seen it so many times.
The alcoholic that starts to go to AA and stops drinking, and his girlfriend subtly keeps trying to be the co-dependent, and his buddies not so subtly try to get him back the way he was.
Now it is happening to me. I'm the kind you can push and push until one day you push too hard and I say ENOUGH. My job is awful, I have not had a raise in years, we have had mass firings multiple times and the stress is horrific. So finally I changed it, by 1) forcing my workplace to give me a 4 day work week and 2) changing my own attitude - learning to take breaks, to be calm and not stress out and take too many things on my plate.
For the last week I have been calm, quiet, done my job but not taken on extra work. I have taken time for co-workers instead of just work, work, work. And I work 4 days/week starting january 1.
And yet, some colleagues are visibly mad at me! And these are colleagues that my reduction to 4 days does not affect their workload at all. I am wondering if they are mad because I am changing, and it makes them uncomfortable? Or becase I stood up for myself? Or WTH? When my boss said I could not have a day free, I did not take no for an answer, and insisted. It was that important to me. I knew it carried risks; my boss could have fired me. He said he didn't like it, but would rather have a happy employee for 4 days than an unhappy employee for 5. And now two colleagues are trying to rile me up, stress me out, basically telling me if I asked to go down to 4 days, and my boss said no, that I needed to accept that and if I couldn't, to quit and find another job. They went on and on. Why?
