Need to nightwean 28 mo

[pokeymama]

My son, John, will only nurse to sleep or fall asleep in the car. I've had to face the fact that I need to wean mostly because the dentist wants to put 4 crowns on his top front teeth - and I know it's the bm. We have day weaned, and I have to drive him for naps (fell asleep once reading in the rocker recliner).

To complicate manners, he does have allergies/sensitivities and try as I can to avoid the problem foods, he has tested sensitive to so many things I cannot avoid EVERYTHING. We do have nightwaking issues and I nurse back to sleep a few times a night at least (we do cosleep). Some of it MIGHT be habit.

Would it be best to cut out the night nursings, or should we concentrate on getting him to fall asleep without boobie? Let me say HOW do I do that? DS won't relax, cosleeping was such a blessing once I discovered how to side-lie nurse. We've tried Daddy putting him to bed but that just ends up with a very upset boy; I've thought about just coming in later and later but now I'm not so sure.

We do a bedtime routine, reading to him seems to be counter-productive because it just excites him. He gets sidetracked so easily (that's my boy!) and doesn't miss a thing. I'm sure other ppl have DC like him! Any advice? Thanks!

Betsey

[lotus.blossom]

Yup! Ds1 was the same, even down to the car rides for naps. I weaned him just before he turned 2 and it was after the major event of moving to a new house. I took it as a good turning point to having his own bed and room. I'll be honest it was a rough week. In the weeks preceeding the no-night night nurse I had reduced his early morning nursings. I did that classic- no nursing till the sun comes up. And then eventually I just didn't nurse him in the early morning. So it was down to the bedtime nurse and maybe 1-2 in the middle of the night. One night I just gently said no more nursing. He cried and stomped and banged on the bedroom door to go downstairs. I stayed with him till he calmed down and eventually fell asleep. And then when he woke in the middle of the night I stayed with him again and comforted him, offered him a sip of water and he went back to sleep. This happened for a few nights before he started resigning himself to not nursing to sleep. I did spend a few months sleeping in his double bed with him for part or most of the night. But when I got pregnant I decided to wean him from havng me in his bed and it worked out fine too.
Oh I forgot that nursing was replaced with rocking in the rocker. I did this till I was 9+ months pregnant with #2 and now he just climbs into bed and falls asleep.

[pokeymama]

Thanks, LB! Just to give a note of encouragement to others, we have eliminated the 1st nighttime nurse. DH and I both lie next to him in bed and read to him. It was almost 3 hours the first couple of nights, and now it's down to less than an hour (but it's only been 5 or 6 nights).

We're about to introduce a bed in his room (maybe start out in our room if necessary). He did fall asleep here 1 day for nap but didn't nurse him back down when he woke 2 (!!!) hours later and he was NOT happy. But that's the worst he's been since trying to wean, except for the first few times when we day weaned a few months ago. But not many tears at night, we'll see when I start to wean after the first nighttime waking...

Thanks again,

Betsey

[Ruthla]

Are you sure you HAVE TO wean due to his teeth?

There's nothing wrong with weaning a toddler if that's what you're both ready for. But I'd hate to see the two of you ruin a good nursing relationship due to misinformation. Have you seen what www.kellymom.com has to say about nursing and dental caries?

[rzberrymom]

Here's the link:

http://www.kellymom.com/bf/older-baby/tooth-decay.html

[lava mama]

We had big-time struggles getting DS to sleep for naps and bedtime until we just cut his nap out completely at 28 months. Once he stopped napping, getting him to sleep at night was a breeze. Do you think your DS is ready to cut napping too?

When it comes to night weaning, I would tell DS, "Okay, you can nurse for 10 seconds, then you get Mama snuggles." Then, I'd count to 10 and tell him that it was time to go back to sleep. I don't recall if there was any whining or crying involved, but I'm guessing it wasn't an issue since I can't remember (LOL). Eventually, I didn't give him an option for "10 seconds," so it was just Mama snuggles from that point on.

I hope that helps! My DS had some dental issues as well, though I don't feel nursing was the greatest contributor. It sure was nice not having to nurse at night though!