DD is begging for earrings

[MamaChicken]

Several of DD's friends have their ears peirced and DD loves looking at my earrings. Now she has been asking to get her ears peirced, consistently asking for 5-6 months. She is 2.5 and when I explain that it hurts to get them peirced she nods her head and agrees that it will hurt. I am sure that she understands that it will hurt because she will pinch or hit herself and say "it hurt like this, yes?". I tried clip earrings, and she wants nothing to do with them.

So what do you think? Should we take her to get them peirced? DH thinks we should since she is asking.

[sapphire_chan]

Clip-on earrings are pretty heavy and annoying. What I'd try first is getting some stickers sized like her friends' earrings and putting them on in the earring place.

OTOH, if you plan on letting her get earrings ever, now, while you can supervise consistently, would be a reasonable time to do so. Versus age 6 or 7 where she'll be able to take out the earrings and get the holes closing up and end up with a difficult time putting in earrings the whole rest of her life.

[SparklingGemini]

If she's asking, I don't see what the problem is.

I know some places will do both ears at the same time for the little ones so that they don't end up with only one earring.

DD has her ears pierce. Her pediatrician did it.

I think you should go for it!

[Cavy]

So is piercing a toddler's or baby's ears not controversial on MDC??? I hang out on another parenting website where ppl get very up in arms about how wrong it is (they believe) -- I am neutral, btw.

[butterfly_mommy]

I would take her to a piercing studio if you are going to let her get her ears pierced.

I am not sure if you should or not, I would only piece my child's body if it was their choice of course but at what age are they able to make those types of decisions? There is more to it then the initial pain, they also need to be cleaned a few times a day until they are healed and if they get infected they can hurt a lot. Would she be able to keep dirty fingers off of them until they are healed?

When I was a kid I wanted my ears pierced when I was about 3 and so my mom took me to have them done at the mall (without telling my dad, he did not want me to have my ears pieced) Well the women got one ear done and It hurt way more then I ever imagined and it burned and I started to scream and wouldn't let her near my other ear. My mom had to take me home with one ear done and well my dad was not pleased. That piecing got infected and got really sore and pussy (I would freak when my mom went near my ear so she had a hard time cleaning it or being able to take it out). Anyway when I turned six they were done again and they got infected a few times again. This repeated for many years. I have never had a piecing done that did not get infected at least once during the healing process (I have had piecings done by guns at hair salons and by needles at piecing studios) Anyway just some food for thought.

I think if it was me I would take my LO to a piercing studio and have the piercer show her the equipment and explain what he/she will do to pierce the ear. I would probably even go as far as to get my ear pieced again to show her the procedure.

[wanderinggypsy]

Hmm... I'll be the voice of dissent and go on record saying I think it's too young. Yes she can understand that it will hurt, but she can't begin to fathom that this is a permanent body modification. Yes, the holes can possibly close off, but at last some degree of scar tissue is a certainty.

Anyways, I kind of think piercings on little tiny ones look kinda yucky... But that is just my humble opinion and I understand that many people think it is attractive.

Good luck, either way!!

[Meems]

My DD who is almost 3, would like to have her ears pierced, and has a good friend whose ears are pierced (exactly where she got the idea). I bought her some stick on earrings, which she likes, and I just pointed out to her that she can *change* or *take off* her earrings whenever she'd like, whereas her little friend cannot. She's pretty cool with it. I don't think I'd let her get her ears pierced until she is 8-10 years old.

[miss_sonja]

Originally Posted by Meems

My DD who is almost 3, would like to have her ears pierced, and has a good friend whose ears are pierced (exactly where she got the idea). I bought her some stick on earrings, which she likes, and I just pointed out to her that she can *change* or *take off* her earrings whenever she'd like, whereas her little friend cannot. She's pretty cool with it. I don't think I'd let her get her ears pierced until she is 8-10 years old.

I think this is a great solution! At 2.5, a child can't understand the full ramifications of ear piercing. Stick ons would let her explore earrings, in a way that clip-ons can't because they HURT, but it's not permanent.

[JL83]

If you decide to do the piercings... Please take her to a real piercing shop where they will use a hollow needle rather than the gun. The gun crushes the flesh and is much more likely to get infected and HURTS so much more than the needle.

[MammaB21]

IME, (at least where I live) most reputable tattoo and piercing shops won't come within 10 feet of a child under 4 or 5, sometimes not even than. I personally would be very conscious of where I let my child get pierced. There are only a few places I would trust to do any tattoos or piercings on myself, so I sure wouldn't take DD to some random jewelry shop in the mall. That is an infection waiting to happen. Not to mention some of those places use cheaper metals which could cause an allergic reaction.

DD is 3 and a half, and she has been asking me since she was 2. I have more than one piercing and a couple tattoos myself, so I am not against it by any means. But I do think she is too young to make that decision. She is just not aware of the amount of commitment she is making. Not to mention she has allergies and eczema so piercings may cause issues for her right now.

So NO was my personal decision for now. But if you decide to go ahead with it, I'd just recommend doing some research of local reputable piercing/tattoo shops. A good shop will have lots of paper work for you to sign. They'll clean everything in front of you before hand, and if they don't I wouldn't trust it. They will also be trained in the actually piercing part. One of the reasons they don't LIKE to do it in kids too young is like PP's have said they have to do both ears at once. This isn't ideal, because there is much higher risk of the piercings being uneven. I've heard WAY too many stories of kids wiggling, or amatoure piercers doing it crooked, or missing the mark. They can even pierce at an angle which can cause problems. If you can find a reputable shop who will do it, and you think your DD can sit through it twice (once on each ear), AND your prepared for the aftercare, I wouldn't see a problem with it. I think beyond the above mentioned, it is a personal decision.

[Drummer's Wife]

DD was barely 3 (or a couple days before her third b-day? I can't recall exactly). She had been begging for at least 6 months, and DH and I were comfortable getting them done. FWIW, I didn't see her as a toddler anymore at that point, the child started walking at 8 mos and is extremely bright and vocal.

It really depends on how you feel about it. Some people have arbitrary ages in mind (my mom made me wait until I was 8, which seemed like forever!) and other people have them pierced when their baby is an infant (I don't agree with this, b/c it's definitely not consensual). My thing was letting my DD decide she wanted them, and we obviously didn't go out and have them done the next day - like I said, it was at least 6 mos after she first started asking to have them done.

I know many parents say wait until they can take care of them themselves, but really, as long as you leave the piercing earrings in for the full 6-8 weeks, and rotate them, and swab them a couple times a day -- it's not like some lengthy, time consuming process (such as it is to say get your kid a a pet -LOL).

No regrets about how we went about it, even though now, at age 8, DD almost never wears earrings. Still, she's not upset about us letting her have them done (she appreciates it on the rare occasion she does decide to wear some).

[Dea]

I'm in the no school of thought too. I think 2.5 is too young to understand. And she'll pull at them and it's not a good idea. I like the sticker idea though!
When I was 18 mos my mom tells me I wanted them so she took me and I had them both done at once and they're crooked.

[Ruthla]

I wouldn't take a toddler to get her ears peirced. IMO, either do it when they're too little to be mobile (and thus won't get them dirty and risk infection), or wait until the child is old enough to understand why she (or he) needs to keep the ears clean. A pre-crawler just can't get into dirt the way a 2yo can.

I got DD2's ears peirced when whe was 4mo, and that's about the oldest I'd do it in babyhood. She wasn't mobile enough to cause any problems before the ears healed, but by 5mo I wouldn't have done it. 2 or 3mo might have been better. Otherwise, I'd wait at least until age 5 or 6, when the child is old enough to understand how to keep the ears clean and either clean them herself or hold still and let me do it. I have friends who didn't let their daughters get peirced ears until 10 or 12.

I suggest getting her stickers or magnetic earrings if you can trust her not to eat them.

[tracymom1]

Although I an super-liberal when it comes to most things in life, I am pretty old school on this one. DD will not have her ears pierced until she is 13. It will be her welcome gift to the teen years. i have no real reason for this other than knowing she will be responsible enough to handle the pain and after care.

[sapphire_chan]

Originally Posted by Cavy

So is piercing a toddler's or baby's ears not controversial on MDC??? I hang out on another parenting website where ppl get very up in arms about how wrong it is (they believe) -- I am neutral, btw.

I think the infant/toddler earring debate is more about kids who aren't given a choice and have no idea about how it will hurt.

Oh, there's another reason to not get her earrings now, I don't know if you can have them done at a piercing studio at this age. And on previous threads about piercings, it was made pretty clear that that's the best place to get them done.

[Shannie77]

Originally Posted by wanderinggypsy

Hmm... I'll be the voice of dissent and go on record saying I think it's too young. Yes she can understand that it will hurt, but she can't begin to fathom that this is a permanent body modification. Yes, the holes can possibly close off, but at last some degree of scar tissue is a certainty.

Anyways, I kind of think piercings on little tiny ones look kinda yucky... But that is just my humble opinion and I understand that many people think it is attractive.

Good luck, either way!!

I feel the same way.

[SparklingGemini]

Originally Posted by sapphire_chan

Oh, there's another reason to not get her earrings now, I don't know if you can have them done at a piercing studio at this age. And on previous threads about piercings, it was made pretty clear that that's the best place to get them done.

Not here. Our local piercing studio would have pierced DD's ears when she was two months, if we had wanted them to.

[flapjack]

I'm having a hard time finding a studio that will do a 4yo in the UK. DD has been asking for a while, though is definitely less keen on the idea of being pierced than she is the idea of the pretty ear-rings.

[Cavy]

Flapjack: are you the same TalkName on MN? .
I've heard that most branches of Claire's Accessories will do it for you.

My gut feeling is what someone else said: do it quickly and simultaneously as a baby or leave it until age 11+. And keep in mind that in the UK most schools will not let a pupil under age ~14 wear conventional earrings, so there might be no point in having a tot here get them.

As an adult I find my earrings snag on stuff all the time, I lose them frequently or they actually pull so much (on my clothes or my hair, whatever), that they hurt. And that's leaving aside chore of cleaning and infection and lumps. I have no idea how a little child could manage all that well -- and I wouldn't as a parent want the extra chore of having to daily think about it all for my offspring.

[twinergy]

When I was in gradeschool and started asking to have my ears pierced my mom told me no for safety reasons. Apparently she new somebody who's child caught an earring while playing and it ripped through her ear. Giving a reason like this is better than saying "no because I said so."