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Making Self-Improvements Tribe

post #1 of 127
Thread Starter 
Sort of like New Year's Resolutions, but for real! Who wants to join me in chatting about what you are trying to do to improve yourself and your family? I'm going to spend more time with the kids and spend more time finding healthy recipes and snacks to feed them, instead of the *ahem* garbage that I have been . I've been back to college in a difficult program but that's only a minor excuse. Mostly, I think improving food will go a long way in improving everyone's mood in the family. I hope.

What else? I've made myself a schedule, that I am going to stick to like rubber glue. I'm working on better managing my money so that I save more and put much less on the credit card. I'm looking deeply into spirituality. Mostly, I'm trying to find my own center and remind myself that I have plenty of self-worth. That's easy to forget when you get caught up in being a wife, mother, student, and friend.

So, how are you improving yourself? Major, minor, it doesn't matter--just let us know!
post #2 of 127
Maybe I belong here. I think self-improvement is actually my hobby. I'm not big on resolutions or anything, but there are several things I'd like to improve upon in myself and related to my family as well.

I'll think about it and get back to you all. I think maybe if I had some support, it would help me keep going when things get hard. (This seems to be cyclical for me.)

And I hear you about the "garbage" food thing.
post #3 of 127
Thread Starter 
Cool, hope you decide to stick around.

Resolutions aren't really the best term, just the closet I could think of. This thread is really just for any self-improvement on any time-frame, no real start date, no end date. Just the goal of starting and maintaining improvement.
post #4 of 127
I am going to the bookstore to pick up a book recommended by some other MDC mamas about self-esteem and codependency. That's probably where I'll be starting on my latest self-improvement project.

I'm also a parenting book junkie. But I only read the good stuff.
post #5 of 127
Thread Starter 
Yep, I need to find some new parenting books too. Both my kids are past the breastfeeding-cosleeping stage of life. I need to find books on living with preschoolers, fun stuff to do with them, ways to create a wholesome and loving environment for them as they go through the next stages of their lives.
post #6 of 127
I am going to move this to the Personal Growth forum.
post #7 of 127
I am reading "The Mother's Guide to Self Renewal" at the moment, so I definitely belong here!!!
I am trying really hard to do more things for me, like a shower once in a while!!!
Honestly, I am trying to par back and just concentrate on myself and my family.
post #8 of 127
So now that I have moved it I guess I should join it too!

My husband is striving to finish his degree by the end of 2010 and I will work on my MBA this year as well. We have been decluttering the house almost nonstop and hope to finish it by this year as well. I am also going to be a bigger part of my homeschooling group in the area this year. It isnt a resolution per se but more of just a goal for us all...
post #9 of 127
Quote:
Originally Posted by AlishaB View Post
I am reading "The Mother's Guide to Self Renewal" at the moment, so I definitely belong here!!!
I am trying really hard to do more things for me, like a shower once in a while!!!
Honestly, I am trying to par back and just concentrate on myself and my family.
showers!!! I need to make more time for those... sigh.
post #10 of 127
Oh, me! Subbing.

I don't know. I feel like "me" needs a lot of work these days. I seem to remember feeling like this at the same time in DS's life (around 9 mo), like it was time for me to get some of myself back.

So I am going to start writing again. I don't know how because I have about the worst case of writer's block in history, but I'm going to try really hard this time. I seriously feel high when I finally get into my creative space, and that can only do good things for me.

DH and I are going to work on doing something different together. Last night, that was reading and talking about A Lover's Complaint. Swoon.

And I am going to stop letting my mom make hurtful, critical comments while standing there and not saying anything. I don't know if I can do much more than that with my relationship with her, but I have GOT to start standing up for myself.

Can't wait to see everyone's progress!
post #11 of 127
Quote:
Originally Posted by almadianna View Post
So now that I have moved it I guess I should join it too!

My husband is striving to finish his degree by the end of 2010 and I will work on my MBA this year as well. We have been decluttering the house almost nonstop and hope to finish it by this year as well. I am also going to be a bigger part of my homeschooling group in the area this year. It isnt a resolution per se but more of just a goal for us all...
We've been talking a lot about these two things as well. My degree is one test and one class away from being done, so I think that's something I want for myself this year, and I want to start thinking about grad school. Those are more career goals than personal ones though.

And I've decided that I'm going to insist that we declutter and simplify our lives before we start looking for a house. No sense in moving a bunch of junk into a nice new place, right?
post #12 of 127
Quote:
Originally Posted by InMediasRes View Post
We've been talking a lot about these two things as well. My degree is one test and one class away from being done, so I think that's something I want for myself this year, and I want to start thinking about grad school. Those are more career goals than personal ones though.

And I've decided that I'm going to insist that we declutter and simplify our lives before we start looking for a house. No sense in moving a bunch of junk into a nice new place, right?
Well for me degrees are personal goals because I am not going to school for any other reason then for myself.

The decluttering is how I feel. I am tired of moving junk to new houses I finally sat down and said no more. If I havent used it in a year I dont need it so it needs to dissappear. Freecycle has been my friend!
post #13 of 127
Quote:
Originally Posted by almadianna View Post

The decluttering is how I feel. I am tired of moving junk to new houses I finally sat down and said no more. If I havent used it in a year I dont need it so it needs to dissappear. Freecycle has been my friend!
Yeah, I'm usually better about it, but DH is the one who always says, "Just box it up, we'll worry about it when we get there." Not anymore. We're not even talking to anyone or looking at all until we get this done. I'm tired of moving 15+boxes of crap we KNOW we don't want to keep.

Of course, I'm partially guilty. We've been carting around lots of books that I just can't bear to part with because I *might* read them one day.
post #14 of 127
Decluttering is so hard for me...I know we are going to move to a bigger place in the next 2 years and I dont want to have to buy any new stuff to replace the stuff I get rid of! But living in a condo with 2 (soon to be 3! boys) and a dog and two cats, just means SO MUCH STUFF!!!
post #15 of 127
I really want to mind my own business more and not give unsolicited advice to my family members. I'm having a hard time getting off my high horse and thinking that "my way" is the best way. Things get so complicated with my family especially now during the holidays. I need to lighten up. My whole family does, but I can only control me.
post #16 of 127
I really need to work on self-discipline. Whether that means going to bed at a decent time, not spending all day on the computer, or not eating an entire large pizza in one sitting will vary from day to day, but dude, I need help. I am convinced that most of my issues stem from a lack of self discipline. I spend too much money, I eat way too much, I waste a lot of time, etc. So yeah, I want to work on that this year. And hopefully not spend as much, work out more, lose 100 lbs, and generally improve my awesomeness.

I also really want to do more to further my education outside of school this year, if that makes sense. I would kill to go back and finish my degree, but we can't afford it right now so it's just not an option. I just discovered iTunesU and downloaded a bunch of courses - I am mostly interested in learning Spanish and getting myself back up to fluency, and learning Hebrew. Maybe. And I need to start writing again. And holy crap, I just discovered that Free Rice has a Spanish learning quiz. ROCK ON!
post #17 of 127
Schedule, schedule, schedule. And some self discipline.

It has become obvious to me that the root of many of my day to day problems is a lack of any sort of schedule or discipline or plan. Whether it's meal prep, or homeschooling, or kid behavior, or cleaning house, or projects, or exercise, or whatever, it all comes back to lack of a schedule THAT I STICK TO!!!! I am very good at making schedules, but most of them last about 2 hours.

The minute something goes astray, I throw the whole thing out the window. As soon as I hit a mental block, or don't know what to do next, I withdraw and go entertain/distract myself (computer, book, etc.) rather than power through and come out the other side.

I'm tired and need to go to bed (another issue I am going to deal with), but I will be back to this thread.
post #18 of 127
Joining in!

This a broad goal, maybe too broad, I want to live up to my potential. Right now, I feel like I am coasting and not in a good way.

I want to improve my home. I want to get rid of the crap that has piled up. (My decluttering totally staled out.)

I want to be healthier to have more energy to enjoy life more.

I want to make major financial changes.

I guess all of the above falls under self-displine.

Will be back with my plan of attack....
post #19 of 127
A couple of months ago I was in a crisis of minimal self-care. Got great advice here, and I started with the shower-every-day goal, and that worked so well that I have moved on to decluttering, regular basic housekeeping, a load of laundry each day (with apologies to the environment,) and last week began regular exercise. I'm being gentle with the fact that I have to start with less strenuous swimming than I used to do, and I'm not making myself do more than 30 minutes at a time. When my son's needs are too great, I don't go, and that has to be ok too.

I'm now reframing my approach and trying out a mantra of "body before house" to keep me from procrastinating on exercise by cleaning more, or skipping a healthy meal because it would take too long and the dishes are waiting.

A current reward: suddenly, all this is adding up to better flow with my husband, and more resilience with my toddler's tantrums and needs.
post #20 of 127
I've been working on my language. Lately, due to my living environment, I've felt like it's almost easier to communicate in less peaceful ways. But, I'm reading a book by Thich Nhat Hanh to help me with that. I am focused on and determined to use my life to create peace.

I create peace. Yes!

I'm also working on what I need to do so that I can start school in August.

Since my baby is "due" in a month, I'm mostly working on internal shifts. And, I'm enjoying every minute of it!
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