OK- Please know that I am *gently* saying all this but, here goes...
When you place your child with other people you cannot expect that they will be *you*. They may be *like* you, they may share many values, but they won't necessarily respond like you, they will have their own conversations, they will interpret things differently and they will have different approaches. But it does not necessarily mean they are wrong or bad (even if they do not do what you would do or believe that you would do it better).
Children are resillient, and really, they can benefit from many approaches and different people in their lives. There are many ways that may not be "as good" as yours, but it doesn't mean that they are so harmful that your child can't still enjoy or appreciate their time with them.
Honestly, it really doesn't sound like she was "waiting to get you out of the way" or disrespectful or anything. It sounds like to *her*, it was an unusual request she might not have agreed with entirely or truly understood your daughters perspective on. And it sounds like she may have had a conversation with your daughter about it that you did not hear word-for-word, that may have contained a misunderstanding but was not cruel or demeaning. Does this make her unfit to be a sunday school teacher? Not in my oppinion
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In think sometimes in the name of "doing it all right", we prevent our children from having authentic relationships with other people who have the potential to be positively influential in their life. Kids are resillient and perceptive enough to be able to manage a variety of styles- some better than others- as long as they are not cruel or demeaning.
And while she doesn't need to "stand up" to the teacher, she can say "My name is Baby" with your encouragment and support (as in, next time, you plan that you both approach the teacher and your daughter says "Please call me Baby". You stand behind, smile, and nod and mouth silently "Thank you!" That really should be enough and is not confrontational. Then you say "Bye, Baby! See you later!").
At some point, we come to a choice. Do we allow our child to take the "risks" with other trusted and caring adults that might not do things quite our way and *maybe* suffer some minor consequences but also have the potential to have another loving and caring adult and another perspective in their lives?
When you place your child with other people you cannot expect that they will be *you*. They may be *like* you, they may share many values, but they won't necessarily respond like you, they will have their own conversations, they will interpret things differently and they will have different approaches. But it does not necessarily mean they are wrong or bad (even if they do not do what you would do or believe that you would do it better).
Children are resillient, and really, they can benefit from many approaches and different people in their lives. There are many ways that may not be "as good" as yours, but it doesn't mean that they are so harmful that your child can't still enjoy or appreciate their time with them.
Honestly, it really doesn't sound like she was "waiting to get you out of the way" or disrespectful or anything. It sounds like to *her*, it was an unusual request she might not have agreed with entirely or truly understood your daughters perspective on. And it sounds like she may have had a conversation with your daughter about it that you did not hear word-for-word, that may have contained a misunderstanding but was not cruel or demeaning. Does this make her unfit to be a sunday school teacher? Not in my oppinion
.In think sometimes in the name of "doing it all right", we prevent our children from having authentic relationships with other people who have the potential to be positively influential in their life. Kids are resillient and perceptive enough to be able to manage a variety of styles- some better than others- as long as they are not cruel or demeaning.
And while she doesn't need to "stand up" to the teacher, she can say "My name is Baby" with your encouragment and support (as in, next time, you plan that you both approach the teacher and your daughter says "Please call me Baby". You stand behind, smile, and nod and mouth silently "Thank you!" That really should be enough and is not confrontational. Then you say "Bye, Baby! See you later!").
At some point, we come to a choice. Do we allow our child to take the "risks" with other trusted and caring adults that might not do things quite our way and *maybe* suffer some minor consequences but also have the potential to have another loving and caring adult and another perspective in their lives?
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- is that if she calls one child by their preferred name, she will have to do it for all of them, which could go something like this..
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