"my snake good?"--advice on giving praise

[sarahtdubb]

Hi mamas!

My toddler (27 months) is playing with playdough and he made a snake, then said "my snake good?" He did this last night while making "houses" with his blocks--- "mama, dada, my house good?"

I'm interested in different ways to respond to this. I don't want him to think that my thinking something is good is what defines it, but I also think he DID make a good snake (esp. considering he's never done it before!).

I said, "wow, look at that snake! Do YOU think it's a good snake?"

Please let me know ideas for what to say when he asks for praise like this. i've seen interesting ideas for this on MDC, but now that I'm in this position, I can't remember them!

Thanks!

[KittyDanger]

Mine goes "Clap!"

[MammaB21]

How about something like, "wow, it looks like you worked really hard on that snake!"
or, "I'm proud of your hard work."
Making the praise about the effort he made goes further than praising the end result (IMO).

But I also don't think it is BAD to praise the end result (especially if he is asking for it). How about, "I think you worked really hard, and the snake looks great!! What do you think?" Reminding him that his opinion is just as, if not more important.

[just_lily]

"What do you think?" is always a good one. Or be descriptive - "look at all the colours in the house!", etc.

When it comes to arts and craft projects I always emphasize that it is THEIR project, and their opinion is what matters. So if I am asked if something is "good" I will say "well it is your project - are you happy with it?" and if they say yes I will say that is awesome, or fantastic or something.

[bettyjones]

"oh a snake" "oh a house" Then comment on the piece. The snake is long. The house is tall etc. Good luck.

[DasMaedchen]

I normally respond with "Oh wow, I LIKE that!!!" or "how cool, I'm gonna hang that on the fridge!!!" (if it's a drawing of course...not a playdoh snake). I think it's also important to praise the effort ("Wow you worked really hard on that!") but I mean really, we all like to hear nice things particularly if we've made something. I remember my parents laughing at a drawing I did when I was young, and I knew I would never do that to my own child.

I don't go over the top, but I do remark on something/anything I genuinely like about what she's done, something cool, or different, or I'll simply say "C., I really like that!" and you can see it in her face, that I've made her day.