Advice on dealing with 1 year old

[mamatowill]

Hello! My almost one year old has just started to use his 4 teeth to bite people. I know that it he is using biting to communicate that he is unhappy- he does it when we take something from him which he should not have or is angry about something. He is unable to speak of course but I don't want him to learn/think this is an acceptable way to communicate. Please don't tell me that we shouldn't let him get into stuff he shouldn't have but that is not always possible. Right now when he bites I tell him sternly "No biting". If I am holding him I put him down. Is there anything else I can do? What have you found successful?

[lifeguard]

I just wanted to commisserate. Ds doesn't bite but hits & no matter how many times I have corrected him he just cannot seem to control himself yet. And if we do raise our voices he thinks it's funny. I think it's just a really tough age.

[foreverinbluejeans]

I like Elizabeth Crary's problem solving methods for toddlers. She is the author of the book Love & Limits and has a website called Star Parenting. She wrote the book Without Spanking or Spoiling in 1981, before AP, that shaped my parenting. I'm a grandmother of a 15 mo.

First try to avoid situations that would lead up to using those teeth. If you do a really job with this then the problem may be solved. If the child bites, acknowledge feelings. "You really want the knife." Set limits. "You may not bite." Teach new skills. You may be able to teach the child to do something else when angry.

[Llyra]

What you're doing already sounds just like what I'd do: look him in the eye, say firmly and clearly not to bite, that it hurts, and then withdraw attention from the child for a short time. Put him down, walk away briefly, etc. If he's bitten somebody else, remove him to a location away from other people and then turn your back.

Don't be afraid to let some irritation/annoyance/pain show in your voice. I don't mean yell at him or anything, but let him see by your expression and tone that you are hurt by the biting. But don't give him a giant reaction--- he's likely to be more amused by that than anything else, and might do it again to see the reaction again.

It won't stick right away. It will take many, many repetitions of this before it sticks. As he gets older, you can start to teach him alternative ways to show his upset or anger-- teaching him to use words, or to stamp his little foot, or something that allows him to express his feelings without hurting anyone. But with a child younger than 18 months, I do think the best way to deal with these behaviors is 1. prevention, as much as you can, and 2. being clear and consistent about telling him that biting hurts, and that it upsets you, and then leaving him to his own devices for a short time.

[chiara]

this is a hard one. I used words "we don't bite" but said it much more loudly if he was biting the boob!

[susanjohnson1969]

1. Be firm. Tell your child that you will not accept biting and why. Tell him/her biting hurts others. Though the kid is young, it is good to use communication as a method of conveying a message.
2. Take away the kid's favorite toy or stop a preferred activity for sometime to help the kid realize that biting is not good.
3. Praise when the kid does not bite.