I did something really foolish a couple of weeks ago. DH goes to the library for books for DS pretty regularly, and he doesn't really screen things that he brings home all that closely. Two weeks ago, he brought home a book about bats because they've been an interest of DS's lately. DS asked me to read the book to him and I was glad to do it, but the subject matter was definitely for an older audience. DS is just over 2.5, and in the book, a mama bat is attacked by an owl and doesn't make it back to her baby. It gets a little graphic about the baby being tired (exhausted, actually) and hungry and alone for three days before another mama who lost her baby takes in the first (alone, exhausted, distressed) baby.
I'm usually really good at editing on the fly, but for some reason this time, I didn't. We read the book right before bed one night, and then he asked to read it again the next morning. I am kicking myself over this, but I did read it and did not edit it (WHY???), and when it got to the part that described the baby bat all alone looking for its mother, DS's face just crumpled and he started sobbing about why it didn't have a mama. I stopped reading and we sent that book back to the library.
Since then, DS has been concerned to the point of sobbing if he doesn't know where I am (which is rare, since I SAH), and has been a little extra vulnerable.
I am at a loss as to how to discuss this with him. I think it's far too soon to get into the specifics of death and loss, especially where babies and mamas are concerned, and I wish that I had been more careful with that book.
Does anyone have any suggestions for how I might talk to him about this? He's asked about our kitties and when they'll die (two of them are nearly 17), but that's a casual conversation for him, it doesn't have a lot of meaning--we've talked about how they're getting old and when they get really really old, their bodies are tired and they stop working, and then the kitties will be gone, but I have no idea how to sort through this mama baby stuff. I really wish I had never picked up that book.
I'm usually really good at editing on the fly, but for some reason this time, I didn't. We read the book right before bed one night, and then he asked to read it again the next morning. I am kicking myself over this, but I did read it and did not edit it (WHY???), and when it got to the part that described the baby bat all alone looking for its mother, DS's face just crumpled and he started sobbing about why it didn't have a mama. I stopped reading and we sent that book back to the library.
Since then, DS has been concerned to the point of sobbing if he doesn't know where I am (which is rare, since I SAH), and has been a little extra vulnerable.
I am at a loss as to how to discuss this with him. I think it's far too soon to get into the specifics of death and loss, especially where babies and mamas are concerned, and I wish that I had been more careful with that book.
Does anyone have any suggestions for how I might talk to him about this? He's asked about our kitties and when they'll die (two of them are nearly 17), but that's a casual conversation for him, it doesn't have a lot of meaning--we've talked about how they're getting old and when they get really really old, their bodies are tired and they stop working, and then the kitties will be gone, but I have no idea how to sort through this mama baby stuff. I really wish I had never picked up that book.
. Yikes.
BUT please stop beating yourself up about it 
your little boy is going to get over this. Perhaps it's triggered a phase and it will pass. When my dd was 3.5 she became a little obsessed with death and dying and was very worried about it. We'd explain things to her and answer her questions over and over, and soon she moved on from the subject.
