DS has found is penis

[MeAndVee]

Well, I knew this day would come sooner or later. I only wished I could handle it better. I have always been uncomfortable with body parts covered by under garments. I don't want to give my negative feelings to my son. I want him to feel fine about his body and not embaressed or humiliated by it. At the same time I want him to be modest and descreet. This pulling down his pants and exposing himself isn't exactly my ideal. ESPECIALLY when people come to visit. Now he is getting erections and pulling down his pants and saying see see. We have been telling him that its okay and to put it away and than we redirect. Is that the right thing to do? What else can I do to let him know that although there is nothing wrong with his fasination in that part the rest of us don't want to see it? Its been REALLY difficult for me while DH takes it all in stride .

[butterfly_mommy]

I'm sorry it is difficult for you but It is so wonderful that you do not want to pass on negative feelings to your son. Good Job Mama!

I think telling your son that his penis is private and that it is fine for him to touch and look at it but it should be done in a private place like his bedroom or bathroom. Also remind him to wash his hands when he is finished exploring Just try to say it like it is no big deal, like asking him to cough into his arm. It's just teaching him social manners. I think just being aware of your feelings and being conscience of your tone, body language and terminology will help send a positive message to tour son.

Keep up the good work mama

[triana1326]

I sympathize - my 16 month old found her vagina and clitoris last month. She likes to touch herself, esp. in the bathtub. When she found it, I just gave her a naming word, just like I did with her knees, mouth, and toes. I was given an extremely progressive sex ed from my mom when I was young (which is why I think I'm the only one of my friends who didn't get pregnant in high school) and am not really uncomfortable with all of this. I just didn't expect it so soon! You're doing great, mama. Just keep reminding him that it's private and redirecting. He'll get the message soon...

[prancie]

I say let him run around with no pants or dipes or underwear. It will speed up potty learning and give him (and you!) time to get used to his penis as an integrated part of his body. There is no shame in any body part and modesty will develop over time.

[MeAndVee]

Thanx guys. He is pretty much finished with TT. He does get nakey time when its just the two of us. And in the summer he runs in the sprinkler and plays in his kiddie pool bare. I have gotten used to seeing him in the buff! But I guess now I am realizing that he is no longer my baby and his body is working towards becoming all grown up and all that stuff that goes with it. Puberty is still a long ways off though. I couldn't even own a dog because of the whole mounting thing some of them do. I have hang-ups, lots and lots of hang-ups!

[tanyam926]

You are such a wonderful mama for recognizing your own hang ups and working to not pass them on to your lo.

I agree w/the pp about teaching manners. I tell my boys that they can play w/their penises in private and leave it at that. None of my boys have been really obsessed, but they all like to explore when the diaper comes off or they are naked.

My oldest is 7 and I never see him doing it, although he is not shy about being naked in front of me, so I assume if he does do it he is doing it in private.

[Dov'sMom]

One thing I've learned is that interest waxes and wanes. DS1 is three and has recently become newly fascinated with penises and the lack thereof. How did I find out? At a community event one night he points to a man we see sometimes socially but not often, the kind of guy you'd never suspect of child abuse but if it came up you could kind of see it -- you know? -- and says, "Mom, X has a penis." My heart almost stopped and I then I thought to ask him, "How do you know?" "Mo-om! Because he's a man!"

[Down2Earth]

I can't help but think of comedian Jo Koy. He has a bit where his son called his penis "tang tang." And then he would go around saying, "Daddy... Daddy... TANG TANG!!!"

Sorry, that doesn't help.