Book Recommendation for Father (Pregnancy/Birth/Newborn)

[~Adorkable~]

x-posted for the most input


i am looking for a good book or two for my Beloved Hubby about pregnancy and birth.
i worry about buying online cause when i go into the stores and glance around and i'm shocked at the crap info that is in some of them. i don't need to be later fighting against something old fashion myth in a book.

i few pieces of info that might help pick the right book:

• this is our first and he has had very little exposure to other babies in his life
• he is medically trained and trusts AMA things so some more natural info coming from "professional" sources might be good
• most of his baby/preggo experiences are ladies in the ER where he worked, so i want to help him understand this is not a medical problem
• he so far has not really come over to the no circ thing, we will not circ our kids in any way what so ever, so i'd sure like him to understand and agree rather than me having to be pushy
• he has shared with me that he feels like this will be "my thing" and that he will feel left out, so anything that shows him ways to be included would be great, i really want him to understand this is very much about both of us
• he is a really open minded person in general, but not connect to something "new age"

i would love maybe a funnier one and a more detailed one and would love to get them right away, maybe use one to tell him when i get my BFP


Edit To Add:
List of Recommendations I'm Getting:
(please read the posts below to read why folks like the various books)

"The Birth Partner," by Penny Simkin

Be Prepared

Thinking Womans Guide Better Birth

Pushed by Jennifer Block

The Baby Book by Dr. Sears

and maybe Father's First Steps by Dr. Sears

Natural Childbirth the Bradley Way

Ina May's Guide to Childbirth by Ina May Gaskin

Gentle Birth, Gentle Mothering by Sarah J Buckley

Be Prepared: A Practical Handbook for New Dads by Gary Greenberg & Jeannie Hayden

[mischievium]

Hi Adorkable !

As far as the end of pregnancy and birth go, one of the best books I've found for partners is called "The Birth Partner," by Penny Simkin. She does a good job of covering natural birth (and strategies for helping your partner through a natural birth), as well as talking about the medical side of child birth and how to help your partner in a more medicalized setting. I like it because, IMO, it does a good job of not being too biased either way, as in not too "trust-birth-and-don't-go-within-5-miles-of-a-hospital-or-the-cascade-of-interventions-will-be-set-in-motion-AHHHHHHH!!!" or too "childbirth-is-an-emergency-only-to-be-handled-by-OBs-and-anesthesiologists-with-drugs-and scalpels-AHHHHHH!!!"

Also, if you want a terrific childbirth instructor and are willing to drive up to Seattle, Penny still teaches childbirth classes. She does one set of classes for planned hospital births and one set for planned out of hospital (homebirth and freestanding birth center) births. The latter does include info on hospital births in case of transfer. Anyway, she's terrific. But sign up early, because her classes fill up quickly .

And... good luck tomorrow morning .

[~Adorkable~]

mischievium!! thanks for the recommendation i'll pick it up and give it a read.

and OMG your 17 weeks preggo!! oh i started crying when i saw your signature, how are you doing darling?

[Jelinifer]

Another vote for the Birth Partner here... otherwise, DH has been reading my stuff (and really enjoyed the Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth by Henci Goer.... not too new agey-my DH isn't really into that either- but with enough natural info with some good research to back it all up.)

[naturegirl419]

Congrats mischievium!

So, I posted this same question a few weeks back because I wanted a book for my hubby for Christmas. He is appreciative of my interest in natural birth and preparation, but doesn't necessarily pursue it himself. He is not a big reader and definitely not of new-agey material. Someone suggested the book "Be Prepared", saying that it was very easy to read and had good practical advice. One poster said it was pretty attachment parenting style-ish as well. I bought it for him and last night he picked it up and read about 1/4 of the way through! Like I said, he DOESN'T read books. He also told me some tidbits as he was reading, which I enjoyed and also was able to learn from. It is definitely more of a tidbit-style read. You can search inside the book at Amazon and see what the style is like. Also, it has 5 stars with 125 reviews on amazon. http://www.amazon.com/Be-Prepared-Pr...2018486&sr=8-1

Good luck!

[olien]

I would recommend a thinking womans guide to a better birth. I think its by henci goer.
this one bec it really explanes the diff aspects of birth & how so much intervention is just not necessary from a fact based medical standpoint.

[JenBuckyfan]

Another for Penny Simkin's Birth Partner book and her classes. We are in the in-hospital birth center class right now and she is really wonderful!

[Jelinifer]

Originally Posted by naturegirl419

Congrats mischievium!

So, I posted this same question a few weeks back because I wanted a book for my hubby for Christmas. He is appreciative of my interest in natural birth and preparation, but doesn't necessarily pursue it himself. He is not a big reader and definitely not of new-agey material. Someone suggested the book "Be Prepared", saying that it was very easy to read and had good practical advice. One poster said it was pretty attachment parenting style-ish as well. I bought it for him and last night he picked it up and read about 1/4 of the way through! Like I said, he DOESN'T read books. He also told me some tidbits as he was reading, which I enjoyed and also was able to learn from. It is definitely more of a tidbit-style read. You can search inside the book at Amazon and see what the style is like. Also, it has 5 stars with 125 reviews on amazon. http://www.amazon.com/Be-Prepared-Pr...2018486&sr=8-1

Good luck!

DH just got this book for Christmas.... and I'm surprised that someone suggested it being AP-friendly. Granted, they do devote a few blurbs to talking about co-sleeping (that was really the only thing that stood out as AP-friendly to me-most books that I've seen don't even touch the topic) but then they spend a few whole pages later in the book to give lengthy instructions on how to practice CIO

[evjolin]

if you want to go the natural birth route, and need him on board, i highly recommend "pushed" by jennifer block.

as for pregnancy books, i got my dh "dad's pregnant too" by harlan cohen. a small paperback, humorously written for men. while isn't about natural birth, i think it's a good read.

[staceychev]

I always think that the Dr. Sears books, especially The Baby Book are a great choice. Especially considering your DH is very AMA-focused, it might help that it's written by an MD! I also noticed on their website that they have a book called Father's First Steps.

[naturegirl419]

Originally Posted by Jelinifer

DH just got this book for Christmas.... and I'm surprised that someone suggested it being AP-friendly. Granted, they do devote a few blurbs to talking about co-sleeping (that was really the only thing that stood out as AP-friendly to me-most books that I've seen don't even touch the topic) but then they spend a few whole pages later in the book to give lengthy instructions on how to practice CIO

What is CIO? If I know I can explain to my husband why thats not good

[~Adorkable~]

thanks for all the responses, sounds like this thread is going to be a good list for many folks, maybe i'll gather them all in the top thread. keep them coming!
CIO stands for Cry It Out, basically letting your babe cry themselves to sleep and the like, MDC is very anti CIO and does not really like folks to talk much about it unless we are all bashing it in unison, so i'll leave it at that.

[CrunchyChristianMama]

Natural Childbirth the Bradley Way

It has great sections for dad and specific labor exercises that he can lead you through to help you relax and prepare. My DH really liked it.

[jsh7809]

This is a great topic. I am hoping to check out "The Birth Partner", too. I keep reading great info on my own in my preg and birthing books, but he's not a big reader, so I end up trying to pass the information along in my own words. I wish there was a better dad-geared book - a friend recommended "The Expectant Father", which I read (and he read about half of so far) but found kind of patronizing and sexist in unexpected ways (maybe I am oversensitive - but it didn't seem to have a lot of great info, so either way it wasn't the top of my list).
I am going to have him watch "The Business of Being Born" with me (I've already seen it) so that he understands even more what we may be up against with our hospital birth... and the beautiful goal of a natural birth!
Someone could make a mint creating some kind of father-geared book or instructional DVD that wasn't condescending to any member of the family, but was easy to read or watch. Maybe a pop-up Papa book?

[katelove]

My husband (an ED NP but not a midwife) is currently reading Ina May's Guide to Childbirth by Ina May Gaskin and enjoying it.

If you're not familiar, she is a midwife who practices in a very natural way. The first part of the book is birth stories, which he may or may not be interested in, although they would be an excellent contrast to his experiences in ED so I would encourage him to read a few of them at least. The second part is a good explanation of the physiology of pregnancy and birth and how our behaviour/actions/interventions can influence the natural actions in a positive or negative way. It is not as packed with citations of original research as, say Sarah J Buckley's Gentle Birth, Gentle Mothering but she is pretty good about making it clear what is supported by research and what is her personal observation based on experience.

I also think Gentle Birth Gentle Mothering is excellent. Not quite as easy to read as Ina May but asks all the right questions about pregnancy and birth intervention and provides the relevant research as well.

[smokeylo]

It's not *perfect*, but the book BE PREPARED is a great book for new Dads. It isn't patronizing but is still funny and helpful, and I think they have good info that's BF supportive and about being an involved, helpful partner. You might check it out!

[~Adorkable~]

these are all so much to read, i love it!!!
im editing the first post so that maybe we can help others with it too.

(apparently i have an issue with the same question asked a thousand times around here, seems like MDC is not gears towards folks using the power of archiving and searching)