What do you NOT like about homeschooling? - Page 4

[kathymuggle]

Originally Posted by ameliabedelia

3) paper...we go through so much paper. The kids are always grabbing paper to draw or write, etc.
.

My youngest goes through mounds of paper. It is completely over the top. I feel werid limiting it - who says "do not draw, write, or cut"????

I asked for, and got, a whiteboard for Xmas - I put it up first thing and the paper mess has already declined. Of course, DD lost the marker for it yesterday (note to self: find marker and attach it by string to whiteboard)

[sha_lyn]

Sometimes I feel like saying "we homeschool" is a lot like being pregnant. suddenly every stranger you run across feels it is their business to tell you a horror story about it and then to give you unsolicited advice on how you should do it.

When someone tells me their kids are in public school I sure don't tell them:

I know someone who graduated from the local highschool that was functionally illiterate.
A friend of mine in high school was having sex with one of the teachers
or
A boy just down the road from our house was beaten to death at the bus stop by a boy that had been bullying him all year.


ETA: Sorry for the rant LOL

Really the only thing I don't like is how hard it is to work in anything else such as appointments for e, house cleaning, downtime etc.

[mommy68]

I agree with the neverending workload. I don't see how moms with older and younger kids can get it all done in a day. I have two older kids and it's hard.

The main thing I dislike about HS'ing is that my children aren't able to get out around kids their own age often. My oldest seems content with just a couple of friends but DD likes to make friends and is a very outgoing and social child. We live in the country and love it that way, as I dislike the idea of the cookie-cutter neighborhoods where my kids can ride bikes and make friends with neighborhood kids. Tried that in the past and most other people are fake. So we have a hard time getting out and my kids actually meeting kids that they have something in common with and truly want to be friends with. If they were in school they would have a better chance of making friends and seeing the same kids every day so they can bond.

[PJsmomma]

Trying to balance everything is definitely difficult. I work part time from home and part time at nights and sometimes it feels like I"m constantly running.

The thing that was most difficult and most surprising was other homeschoolers criticizing me for the curriculum I chose rather than using what they chose. It wasn't pretty either. I expected "outside" criticism but not from "insiders".

[lach]

Originally Posted by PJsmomma

The thing that was most difficult and most surprising was other homeschoolers criticizing me for the curriculum I chose rather than using what they chose. It wasn't pretty either. I expected "outside" criticism but not from "insiders".

I'm always really shocked by that, too. I don't get it at all. I've seen really snide remarks in various places along the lines of "oh, you're not a real homeschooler. You just school at home." Also nasty things about other homeschooling philosophies, but that seems to be the major one. I don't get why you'd be that obnoxious and divisive when you're already part of a political and social minority? Wouldn't you want to gather as many people as possible under your umbrella?

[CariOfOz]

Originally Posted by lach

I'm always really shocked by that, too. I don't get it at all. I've seen really snide remarks in various places along the lines of "oh, you're not a real homeschooler. You just school at home."

or you're one of those 'unschoolers' (yep, actually heard that one at a hs meet up) They seem to forget that ppl hs because the one size fits all environment does not work for them

[TightwadMom]

I am so glad to see this thread....

we had to pull my third grade daughter out of school this year for some problems she was having, and we started homeschooling in September.

She LOVES homeschooling, and has done tremendously well. It's been me, however, who has had a couple of issues with it, and I can never really talk about it at home because I don't want her to feel like I don't want to homeschool her.

At times, I feel so isolated and alone with all of this. I don't know any other moms who are homeschooling. Trying to keep up with the house has become overwhelming, as we also have a two year old still at home and a high school daughter as well. I sometimes feel as if everyone else has a life, and mine consists pretty much of schooling, laundry, and cleaning.

I know that we're doing the best thing for HER right now, and she seems to have excelled tremendously this year.

It just feels so good to know that there are other moms who sometimes feel overwhelmed and that homeschooling isn't a perfect process.

[boysmom2]

Wow! OP here. I haven't checked this for several days as I've been down with the flu. It's been great to read all of your replies. Friends for my kiddos has been the one issue I'm most concerned about. I appreciate all of your honesty. I'm going to have to look more into our local hs groups and really think about this.

Thanks everybody! Keep the ideas coming!

[~Boudicca~]

Bitter Homeschooler's Wishlist pretty much summed it up for me That and my kids make me nuts. But it's all good

[Collinsky]

Originally Posted by boysmom2

Wow! OP here. I haven't checked this for several days as I've been down with the flu. It's been great to read all of your replies. Friends for my kiddos has been the one issue I'm most concerned about. I appreciate all of your honesty. I'm going to have to look more into our local hs groups and really think about this.

Thanks everybody! Keep the ideas coming!

It really depends on your area -- in some areas finding anything to do with likeminded people is a challenge (or a really long drive!) and in other areas there is SO Much available to do that overscheduling and trying to do too much is a common scenario. I've done a few different situations, and there can be a lot of difference. Even in the most rural areas, there are possibilities for socialization - probably not every day, or as readily accessible as other areas, but it's still there - so if you find yourself in that situation just remind yourself that it's common to have those concerns and barriers, and that there are probably lots of opportunities that you just haven't found yet. I've been there (was hs'd myself under those circs, and I think it's way worth it!) Beginning now to look for what is available in your area is a good idea, as it can give you a good sense of whether you live somewhere that that might be a challenge you face, or whether there is a large, active, hs community there. Keep in mind that many hs groups are completely fine with interested parents joining them for their meeting or activity to get to know them better, so you may want to go ahead and contact them and see if you could crash their next party.

We're really pleased with the hs community in our area - large, diverse (in styles/philosophies) and active. We COULD be meeting other homeschooling families or taking part in out-of-house activities pretty much every day of the week if we wanted. I absolutely would go crazy if I tried that, but it is nice to know that we have so many options.

[ancoda]

Originally Posted by kgianforti

What math are you using?

Sorry i did not respond faster, I just saw this.
He just finished up Calvert math for 2nd grade and we do workbooks and lots of online math games to add fun. I buy all of my curriculum second hand or get it free from friends, so finding stuff that works for us is sometimes hard.

[Rach]

I hate when I get sick that there's really not a lot of schooling going on. I have had an awful sickness this week and have barely managed to get out of bed to make meals. I made them read to me in order to get some reading practice in and did basic math review but I feel like we didn't accomplish much.

And yes, PAPER! We go through so much paper! For printables, drawing paper, writing, etc... It seems there's never enough.

[accidental_hs'er]

Everything in life isn't perfect...

...and neither is homeschooling. Though I find it infinitely better than the alternative.

Down sides for me are:

- Less me time. I am always on. I am a mom, chauffeur, teacher, friend, disciplinarian, librarian, guidance counselor, therapist, cook, shopper, etc. It never ends. Not that this isn't the way for most moms and dads. Still, dh gets to take a vacation from work and I realize there is no vacation from homeschooling mom.

- Money. It is flying out the window. I know homeschooling is only as expensive as you make it but in order to accomplish what I want, it takes cash. There is no funding where I live. I want my dks to have art classes, french classes, go to gym, join scouts, etc...it is not cheap. I find the material for the few curriculums we have chosen are relatively well priced but there is always the consumable stuff you go through...or something you may not have laying around needed for a science experiment that week. Playdates and field trips can cost too, whether is be gas or the cost of a yearly pass to the zoo.

- Driving. There is a lot of it. Homeschoolers tend not to live next door to each other. In my area we visit 4 cities (that border each other) regularly to visit our closest hs friends and parks. Activities for us are clustered but not in the same building so we drive to art, then 15 minutes away to gym, then, well you get the picture.

- My own level of motivation and guilty conscience. I am I doing enough? Does ds know X. How is dd's writing coming along? Have I spent enough time on lessons? Have we read enough this week? Has ds been on the Wii for 3 hours now? The further I go along in this hs'ing adventure, the less guilt I feel - probably because I see they are fine and I haven't completely ruined them.

- A clean house. I have neighbours who have the house to themselves for more than 6 hours a day. They can clean it while the kids are gone. Not us. Also because we are one income and because we spend a good chunk of change each year on the kids we have bought a small house - which is filled to the brim with books (that are everywhere ) and just life.

- Not getting many breaks from each other. The dks and I are together a lot. Sometimes it would be nice if someone else would take them for a few hours each week. Just long enough for me to miss them.

I love homeschooling but it isn't always easy. I still wouldn't trade my life for anything though. I love this life, warts and all.

[prairiebird]

- This is my first year back doing this, so for me, it's mainly trying to get myself out of a public school mindset. That's really hard for me because I went to college to be a teacher for three years before changing majors and my husband is a teacher.

-Being in an area where most people are homeschooling because of religious reasons. The only co-op is Christian based, and it is very large. And while there are secular offerings all over town, sometimes the families participating seem to forget that not every homeschooler is this way around here. Even most the homeschool 4-H group participants expect the group to say a prayer before they have their snack, and that's not even allowed by the 4-H program. I happen to be raising my kids loosely non-denom Christians, but I think this is overkill and really disrespectful of non-Christians.

Sorry, that last one is really my current big peeve about homeschooling around here because a group of parents are really upset that the library middle readers group are going to read "The Lightning Thief" for February and go to see the movie as a group at the end of the month, all paid for by the library. My son is so excited about this, and I'll be mad if this group pressures the librarian to change the book because it 'glorifies false gods' as they are accusing. Since they make up the majority of the group, I'm afraid they'll get their way.

[Callimom]

Originally Posted by prairiebird

- This is my first year back doing this, so for me, it's mainly trying to get myself out of a public school mindset. That's really hard for me because I went to college to be a teacher for three years before changing majors and my husband is a teacher.

-Being in an area where most people are homeschooling because of religious reasons. The only co-op is Christian based, and it is very large. And while there are secular offerings all over town, sometimes the families participating seem to forget that not every homeschooler is this way around here. Even most the homeschool 4-H group participants expect the group to say a prayer before they have their snack, and that's not even allowed by the 4-H program. I happen to be raising my kids loosely non-denom Christians, but I think this is overkill and really disrespectful of non-Christians.

Sorry, that last one is really my current big peeve about homeschooling around here because a group of parents are really upset that the library middle readers group are going to read "The Lightning Thief" for February and go to see the movie as a group at the end of the month, all paid for by the library. My son is so excited about this, and I'll be mad if this group pressures the librarian to change the book because it 'glorifies false gods' as they are accusing. Since they make up the majority of the group, I'm afraid they'll get their way.

Oh boo - I hear you.
I find the politics and the energy consumed trying to navigate very delicate relationships with people of diverse religious background to be exhausting. It's probably the biggest frustration of homeschooling for me.

The other is the feeling that I am never going to get to it "all". I know logically it isn't even a reasonable goal and yet it still frustrates me.

The last is the 80/20 rule. I am an organizer by nature but I frankly am getting annoyed by the 80 percent of our homeschool group who think it is okay to just come along for the ride without contributing. And I get vocal about those who loudly complain without contributing. I have tonnes of ideas I would like to do but I have become more and more selective about who I am willing to organize activities for.

The day to day homeschooling with my kids - generally I love it. The issues are more related to "outside" stuff or my own annoyances/insecurities than things to do with my kids.
hth
Karen

[wallingjan1]

I miss time to myself. I love my kids, but I feel like I'm on 24/7.

What really prompted me to reply though, was all the comments about negative comments and feedback on homeschooling. I can honestly say that the only response that I get is jealousy and encouragement. But I don't know if the jealousy is because I homeschool or because I'm at home (and thus not at work!)

Pam