she really wants to wear underwear, but she keeps peeing in them

[readytobedone]

DD (2 years, almost 8 months) has been pooping on the potty pretty regularly. last night she spontaneously requested not to wear diapers anymore, but to wear underwear. my mom and brother went out and bought her some. (we are visiting them for the holidays and left her undies, which i bought awhile ago, at home.)

but...i can't figure out how to get her to pee on the potty. so far, she's peed all of her pees in her pants (other than overnight, when she wore a diaper). is it normal for it to be this hard to get them to pee on the potty?

i've been taking her to the potty as much as she will go. she will sit on it, but she never pees.

tips?

[tsfairy]

Will she let you put anything absorbent in her undies? That might make the transition easier on you. Even just a folded washcloth would work pretty well. Or you could put her in sweatpants, which are usually pretty absorbent.

Give her a little time. If she's primarily been peeing in a diaper up until last night, this is very new to her and she has to figure out timing and the sensation of peeing, etc.

[Xerxella]

Making it really worth it worked for us. DS got a Thomas Show for going pee in the potty. He still (voluntarily) sat on the potty for 45 minutes the first time, just to get up and wet himself 15 minutes later. He got it soon after that. I think wetting themselves really lets them see what going pee feels like and the actual consequences (your socks get wet). Don't make too big of a deal of it, but of course it is a natural big stoppage to play.

Let her make messes for a few days. And take her often to the potty. There may be a reward for just trying like an m&m or a smartee or whatever. Put something semi absorbant in there to keep the mess to a minimum. Good luck!

[Chicky2]

We are currently going thru this too. My 3 yo dd is the most resistant to potty learning of all my kiddos. The others just loved to go sit on the potty. This one, I have to bribe. W/all the others I would give one M&M for pee and 2 for poo. Aaralyn gets one for sitting, one more for pee, 2 more for poo.

That said, I decided that even though it's cold, I'll just have to ditch the panties tomorrow in favor of naked bottom. When there's something on that bottom, they just pee. The ONLY way I've been able to get it done is to go naked on bottom. I'll just crank up the heat and move the potty by the fireplace, lol.

Ok, seriously, now that I just typed that out, my sweetie ran in here and said she had to pee and she made it! Woohoo! She is happily showing off her M&Ms, lol.

We're still going nakie tomorrow. It's just easier on my washing machine, lol.

[SparklingGemini]

Are you still taking her to the potty when she pees?

For us this was a major step in the potty learning process; matching the sensation of wetting panties with actually going in the potty.

I would keep up with the panties, and when she pees, just take her to the potty and put her on it right then. Even if she doesn't go, its still a learning tool.

It can take a while to retrain the body to realize what a full bladder is and that a full bladder means you need to relieve yourself on the potty and not in your pants/diaper.

I think its great that she requested to go without diapers and how awesome of you to respect her desires, even if it means a bit of extra work!

[Artichokie]

My then-20 mo old spontaneously PL'd herself over a weekend by insisting she was done with diapers. I honored that and packed them away. She wore nothing on the bum when we were home for about a month and I insisted that she take a potty break very frequently (I think every hour or so?). I sat her potty in the living room where it was easily accessible and obvious. If she peed on the floor, I had her sit on the potty the entire time I cleaned up the puddle, thus making sure it wasn't more convenient for her to just pee wherever she was. She is now 24 mo and 100% PL'd.

ETA: we did not use food rewards.
Edit #2: if she is truely asking for undies, those can be a great reward. Don't let her pee in underwear - leave her in a bare bum at home and a diaper out and about until she is consistently remembering to pee in the potty. Then the pretty undies can be offered with great fanfare.

[K-Mom3]

Try sitting her on a potty (or even the toilet) while you do something relaxing for a while. You could even try to time it when she might need to go, like 30 min after a meal or something. Some kids it takes a while for them to be able to relax the right muscles when they have a bare bottom and are sitting. My dd was willing to sit for long periods of time if we read a book together and it didn't take too long before she peed in it.

I also second the idea of using the cool underpants as a reward.

[CheriK]

DD#1 was out of diapers literally overnight, when she refused to wear a diaper one day. She was 2 yrs, 4 months. We'd already been talking a lot about using the potty, she'd spent a lot of time bare bottomed so she'd seen what happened, and she'd had a few successful poops/pees in the potty before that, but I wasn't expecting it to happen quite that way. I'd been telling her (she hated getting a diaper on) that when she was ready to use the potty to pee/poop, she didn't have to wear a diaper any more. She stayed in nighttime diapers, but had only a couple accidents. Underwear were only purchased after she'd stopped wearing a diaper.

Her twin brother insisted on wearing undies when sister got them. He was no where near ready to potty learn - he seemed completely unaware he was peeing until after it happened. I wasn't going to tell him he couldn't wear undies, though, so we just carried lots of extra clothes for a while! We talked about being aware of the need to pee, listening to your body, and how when his body was ready he would be able to hold and release his pee on the potty. He went back to diapers on his own after about a week, and potty learned without many accidents about 5 months later.

I think it's wonderful to let her experience the consequences by wearing undies. I wonder if she'll either learn to use the potty or will decide to go back to diapers, if she's allowed to choose for herself without being pressured either way. Not making a big deal of it either way seems important. We never offered any rewards (beyond buying them undies when they stopped wearing diapers). My mom swears by offering candy, which is what worked with me. However, she also delayed potty learning because they were moving, so I was probably more than ready and I never ever got candy otherwise. Amazing how bribes work if the child is otherwise ready - maybe appropriate for a reluctant child who is clearly developmentally ready.

[MeAndVee]

Originally Posted by SparklingGemini

Are you still taking her to the potty when she pees?

For us this was a major step in the potty learning process; matching the sensation of wetting panties with actually going in the potty.

I would keep up with the panties, and when she pees, just take her to the potty and put her on it right then. Even if she doesn't go, its still a learning tool.)

Thats exactly what we did and after about five days he was dry during the day {most days}. I would watch him and REALLY watch him when he started the pee pee dance but I wouldn't say anything or take him until I saw a wet spot. Then I would rush him to the bathroom and put him on the pot. At first he wouldn't release in the toilet but after a day or two he did and BIG celebration and praise and it kinda dawned on him that Oh I can pee in this thing. Also, asking him if he needs to go often resulted in a No. And I read somewhere that taking them at schedule times doesnt allow them to learn what a full bladder feels like. So instead I would just tell him if he needs to pee to just tell me and we will run to the bathroom. I really wanted more for him to tell me than for me to have to keep guessing when he needs to go.

Good luck mama!

[weliveintheforest]

i often find that when one of my kids has an accident they are not done, and will finish the pee on the potty. maybe as soon as she pees you could get her onto the toilet?

[ann_of_loxley]

If she will put anything absorbant in her underwear, I have found the use of pantyliners or thin pands to work wonderfully for those little pees until they get the hang of it. In fact, I should market this idea to Pampers lmao.

[dogretro]

Originally Posted by ann_of_loxley

If she will put anything absorbant in her underwear, I have found the use of pantyliners or thin pands to work wonderfully for those little pees until they get the hang of it. In fact, I should market this idea to Pampers lmao.

Oh, Ann, don't you know, they already make them!: http://www.onestepahead.com/catalog/...egoryId=117215

lol, there's already one of everything out there, isn't there?

[hollytheteacher]

Originally Posted by weliveintheforest

i often find that when one of my kids has an accident they are not done, and will finish the pee on the potty. maybe as soon as she pees you could get her onto the toilet?

exactly. this is what we did with ds (and still do if he has an occasional accident).