Birth Story novel
On Dec 18, I had my regular weekly midwife appointment. I was starting to feel so defeated after having contractions off and on for like a month and a half. I was really starting to feel physically and mentally exhausted. Everything at the appointment went as usual except for the fact that Derek’s head was not sitting in my pelvic bones the way he was supposed to. Instead, his head was sitting on the outside rim of my pubic bones. This totally explains why I hadn’t been able to walk right for a while. She told me to go to the chiropractor for something called the Webster Technique. I was totally skeptical that this would work, but since I had basically been contracting all day, I was willing to do anything. I ordered the midwife and the kids some lunch (She offered to watch them since the next client wasn‘t due in for another couple hours), called Mark to let him know what was up and asked him to meet me at the midwife’s office, and headed out the door. About a half hour, and $45 later, I came back to see if his head had changed places. She felt and reported that it felt “much better” and that she wanted me to go home and basically relax the rest of the day. I was still really skeptical at this point but still contracting pretty regular. Mark, the kids, and I headed home. Dylan got home from school shortly after. We ordered pizza (yes, again…I didn’t get any of the lunch pizza and it sounded really good!) and watched Harry Potter (which I ended up dozing off during) We put the kids to bed around 8 and cuddled on the couch a little. I was starting to get a lot of discomfort during the contractions so we decided to start timing them. To keep occupied, we ordered the last of the kids’ Christmas gifts online. Contractions were coming every 5ish minutes and lasting about 45 seconds- 1 minute. I was about to call and get advice from the midwives, when all this sudden, around 11:30, they STOPPED! AAARRRGGGHHH…I was quite angry at this point. Like, crying angry. I mean, come on now. I had been dealing with this for a month already. Completely let down, and exhausted, Mark and I crawled into bed at about 12:30. We laid in bed talking and he gave me some encouragement. I was all comfy when I felt leaking. I reached down and sure enough I was steadily draining. I told Mark and he didn’t really believe me until I stood up. Oh, GLORIOUS amniotic fluid, how long I had been waiting for your presence! It was clear and that is really all I cared about at this point. I was so excited, I got the shakes really bad. I sent Mark out for some Depends so I could walk around and not have to mop up puddles. I called my midwife, Beth, and let her know about the goings on. While Mark was gone, I called my mom. I was contracting furiously at this point. I couldn’t talk through them. They were still kinda far apart though. Mark got home and I was able to get off the towels on the bed finally. I let him go back to sleep while I did what any women in labor should do: got on Facebook…I mean, my peeps need to know these things, right? So, Mark’s nap only lasted about 20 minutes because I reallllly needed him at this point. We got in the garden tub together and tried to relax a little. Then, I wanted out and in bed. Then, I wanted up and walking around… By 3:30, I was contracting like every 3 minutes. Beth was on her way. Back to the tub I headed. I felt like at this point, I was dealing with the whole thing pretty well. She got there and checked my progress. She said “It’s going to be a while. I can barely get my fingertip in your cervix.” I was sooooooooooo shocked and upset. I mean, how can that be? I had been laboring really hard for the last 3 hours, and NOTHING to show for it?!? By this time, I was getting cold, and the hot water had run out. I decided to labor in bed for a while. I remember that the labor went from painful to “Holy s*$#, this. Sucks.” really quickly. Like in between contractions I was saying all kinds of things that I know deep down wasn’t true. I was begging to go to the hospital, announcing how sure I was that I couldn’t do it anymore, and profusely apologizing for being such a failure. Mark, God bless him, would contradict every negative thing I was saying. She checked me once again to see what was going on down there. Mind you, I had only been in the bed for about 45ish minutes laying on my side. She got a smile on her face and said I was 8cm. How I went from nothing to 8 in 45 minutes, I have no idea. Mark and her encouraged me to get back in the tub. He put on swim trunks and joined me. I think it was like 5a.m. by this point. Beth called her apprentice who showed up less than an hour later. I was only 8cm, but I was having this excessive urge to push. That is frustrating. And I was completely out of control at this point. My body slowed down enough that I finally “passed out” for about 6 minutes. I remember silence in the room except for the ambient music we had playing in the background. Mark had my limp head in his hand since my head was starting to go underwater. In one contraction, I snapped out of my “pseudo unconsciousness” It was intense. I have no idea how I managed to do this with Pitocin and no epidural the last time. Finally, pushing time. It didn’t feel as relieving to me this time around. It burned so bad. I was screaming bloody murder during each contraction. Beth was doing fantastic at trying to get me to relax and focus on letting my muscles relax. They thought maybe he had his arm up and that it was tearing me inside. There was more blood than I remember as well. I have no idea why, but I asked her if I was going to die. I mean, I really have no idea where that came from. It felt like his head was right there so I reached down. It wasn’t crowning. I was able to kinda reach in and feel him. That is what kept me going. They checked his heart beat to see how he was tolerating things and he was having some decelerations that we didn’t like. I was put on my hands and knees. I wish I would have had the strength to do this sooner because it seemed as though I only pushed like 5 more times in this position. He crowned and that was basically it. It was 6:37 in the morning. My intense screaming had woken up my two oldest. Dylan asked “Who is screaming in here?“ It was kinda comical. Derek had his cord around his neck. This was causing the decels. And we can’t figure out if it was there, or if unwrapping the cord caused the knot to be there, but he had a knot in his cord like Dylan had. Mark and I marveled at our new little person as we waited for his cord to stop pulsing. It was surreal. I again went back to apologizing profusely (Don’t know why I felt the need to apologize, but I did.) and thanking everyone for not giving up on me. The placenta decided to come out as I stood up to get into the bed. Derek was still attached to it. Once we got to the bed, Derek and I were checked out. Daddy cut the cord, and Dylan, Devon, and Dorothy were allowed to come see what all the noise was about. All in all it was an amazing experience and I can’t imagine birthing any other way. Oh, and I am no longer skeptical of alternative medicine and chiropractic stuff.
On Dec 18, I had my regular weekly midwife appointment. I was starting to feel so defeated after having contractions off and on for like a month and a half. I was really starting to feel physically and mentally exhausted. Everything at the appointment went as usual except for the fact that Derek’s head was not sitting in my pelvic bones the way he was supposed to. Instead, his head was sitting on the outside rim of my pubic bones. This totally explains why I hadn’t been able to walk right for a while. She told me to go to the chiropractor for something called the Webster Technique. I was totally skeptical that this would work, but since I had basically been contracting all day, I was willing to do anything. I ordered the midwife and the kids some lunch (She offered to watch them since the next client wasn‘t due in for another couple hours), called Mark to let him know what was up and asked him to meet me at the midwife’s office, and headed out the door. About a half hour, and $45 later, I came back to see if his head had changed places. She felt and reported that it felt “much better” and that she wanted me to go home and basically relax the rest of the day. I was still really skeptical at this point but still contracting pretty regular. Mark, the kids, and I headed home. Dylan got home from school shortly after. We ordered pizza (yes, again…I didn’t get any of the lunch pizza and it sounded really good!) and watched Harry Potter (which I ended up dozing off during) We put the kids to bed around 8 and cuddled on the couch a little. I was starting to get a lot of discomfort during the contractions so we decided to start timing them. To keep occupied, we ordered the last of the kids’ Christmas gifts online. Contractions were coming every 5ish minutes and lasting about 45 seconds- 1 minute. I was about to call and get advice from the midwives, when all this sudden, around 11:30, they STOPPED! AAARRRGGGHHH…I was quite angry at this point. Like, crying angry. I mean, come on now. I had been dealing with this for a month already. Completely let down, and exhausted, Mark and I crawled into bed at about 12:30. We laid in bed talking and he gave me some encouragement. I was all comfy when I felt leaking. I reached down and sure enough I was steadily draining. I told Mark and he didn’t really believe me until I stood up. Oh, GLORIOUS amniotic fluid, how long I had been waiting for your presence! It was clear and that is really all I cared about at this point. I was so excited, I got the shakes really bad. I sent Mark out for some Depends so I could walk around and not have to mop up puddles. I called my midwife, Beth, and let her know about the goings on. While Mark was gone, I called my mom. I was contracting furiously at this point. I couldn’t talk through them. They were still kinda far apart though. Mark got home and I was able to get off the towels on the bed finally. I let him go back to sleep while I did what any women in labor should do: got on Facebook…I mean, my peeps need to know these things, right? So, Mark’s nap only lasted about 20 minutes because I reallllly needed him at this point. We got in the garden tub together and tried to relax a little. Then, I wanted out and in bed. Then, I wanted up and walking around… By 3:30, I was contracting like every 3 minutes. Beth was on her way. Back to the tub I headed. I felt like at this point, I was dealing with the whole thing pretty well. She got there and checked my progress. She said “It’s going to be a while. I can barely get my fingertip in your cervix.” I was sooooooooooo shocked and upset. I mean, how can that be? I had been laboring really hard for the last 3 hours, and NOTHING to show for it?!? By this time, I was getting cold, and the hot water had run out. I decided to labor in bed for a while. I remember that the labor went from painful to “Holy s*$#, this. Sucks.” really quickly. Like in between contractions I was saying all kinds of things that I know deep down wasn’t true. I was begging to go to the hospital, announcing how sure I was that I couldn’t do it anymore, and profusely apologizing for being such a failure. Mark, God bless him, would contradict every negative thing I was saying. She checked me once again to see what was going on down there. Mind you, I had only been in the bed for about 45ish minutes laying on my side. She got a smile on her face and said I was 8cm. How I went from nothing to 8 in 45 minutes, I have no idea. Mark and her encouraged me to get back in the tub. He put on swim trunks and joined me. I think it was like 5a.m. by this point. Beth called her apprentice who showed up less than an hour later. I was only 8cm, but I was having this excessive urge to push. That is frustrating. And I was completely out of control at this point. My body slowed down enough that I finally “passed out” for about 6 minutes. I remember silence in the room except for the ambient music we had playing in the background. Mark had my limp head in his hand since my head was starting to go underwater. In one contraction, I snapped out of my “pseudo unconsciousness” It was intense. I have no idea how I managed to do this with Pitocin and no epidural the last time. Finally, pushing time. It didn’t feel as relieving to me this time around. It burned so bad. I was screaming bloody murder during each contraction. Beth was doing fantastic at trying to get me to relax and focus on letting my muscles relax. They thought maybe he had his arm up and that it was tearing me inside. There was more blood than I remember as well. I have no idea why, but I asked her if I was going to die. I mean, I really have no idea where that came from. It felt like his head was right there so I reached down. It wasn’t crowning. I was able to kinda reach in and feel him. That is what kept me going. They checked his heart beat to see how he was tolerating things and he was having some decelerations that we didn’t like. I was put on my hands and knees. I wish I would have had the strength to do this sooner because it seemed as though I only pushed like 5 more times in this position. He crowned and that was basically it. It was 6:37 in the morning. My intense screaming had woken up my two oldest. Dylan asked “Who is screaming in here?“ It was kinda comical. Derek had his cord around his neck. This was causing the decels. And we can’t figure out if it was there, or if unwrapping the cord caused the knot to be there, but he had a knot in his cord like Dylan had. Mark and I marveled at our new little person as we waited for his cord to stop pulsing. It was surreal. I again went back to apologizing profusely (Don’t know why I felt the need to apologize, but I did.) and thanking everyone for not giving up on me. The placenta decided to come out as I stood up to get into the bed. Derek was still attached to it. Once we got to the bed, Derek and I were checked out. Daddy cut the cord, and Dylan, Devon, and Dorothy were allowed to come see what all the noise was about. All in all it was an amazing experience and I can’t imagine birthing any other way. Oh, and I am no longer skeptical of alternative medicine and chiropractic stuff.
You have a wonderful DH and birth partner.
