baby whisperer book

[mommy22boys]

Has anyone read or heard of the book "the baby whisperer solves all your problems". I just read the section on sleeping. She recommends a method called pick up/ put down, where you put baby down to sleep, if/when baby cries pick him up until stops, the second he stops put him back down then if he cries again do the same thing again, until he finally sleeps. She says it could take 100s of times but eventually it will get him to fall asleep on his own. I want my 6month old to fall asleep on his own, not while breastfeeding or being walked around, rocked, etc.
Another mom who is also against CIO recommended this book to me and said it worked great for her. But I feel like even though it is not CIO, it feels like it kind of is. I tried it for a nap, and the second time I put him down he started crying as soon as i started putting him down. And he started crying so hard and even holding him wouldn't help him, he didn't wanna nurse or anything after that, he was just so angry and hurt it seemed like. Has anyone here tried this method? Does anyone agree it is a bit like CIO?

[kdescalzi]

IMO, the baby whisperer is a horrible book that is very anti-AP. I read it when ds was born and I really did try following it because I thought it was the "right"thing to do. Eventually I realized that it went against my heart and how I wanted to parent. When I was pg with dd I threw the book out. I feel it is a form of CIO in the sense that she incourages you to not listen to your childs needs but to put forth your own needs ahead of them. Just my 2 bits but I hated the book and would definately recommend the NCSS or one of Dr. Sears's books. I worried about parenting my ds to sleep so much that I was always stressed...this time around with dd I do whatever works...just go with your heart.

[Meems]

I also have a close friend that used this book... with success. She said it took a solid 2 weeks to get it working well. I personally couldn't do it, but her kid sleeps way better than mine Anyhow, I read a good bit of the book, and there were a *few* things that she said that I used that were worthwhile and not anti-AP. 1- the 45 min sleep cycle-- DD would always wake after 45 min, and I tried going in and gently rubbing DD's back after 30 min and then she would sleep for hours rather than waking up at the 45 min mark. She also does the "dream feed" and instead of putting bottlefeeding, I would breastfeed DD at 11 am so she would sleep longer through the night.

[Momtwice]

This book is on the list at Kellymom.com of books that can jeopardize your breastfeeding relationship. http://www.kellymom.com is written by a board certified lactation consultant.

I don't like the book either, and I think parenting to sleep is wonderful (exhausting, sometimes inconvenient, but normal and wonderful too.)

[mommy22boys]

Yeah I totally agree with all of you! Good to know that I wasn't just being over protective!
I forgot to add, the only reason that I don't want baby to be breastfed or rocked and walked to sleep, is because I have a 2.5 year old who I used to breastfeed to sleep until he self weaned about 8 months ago and now he still wakes up in the middle of the night crying and needs to be picked up and walked around back to sleep, it's the only way he will go back to sleep. So I really don't want to go through that with this baby, otherwise I totally wouldn't mind, and I don't mind now, but I just want him to know how to fall asleep on his own for when he doesn't breastfeed anymore and is too heavy to rock to sleep comfortably.
I have the "No cry sleep solution" too, is that what NCSS is? I bought that for my first DS but never actually bothered trying her methods back then, I think I'll reread and see if that's better for us.
Thanks for the replies

ETA: thanks for that link! (kellymom.com)

[rzberrymom]

Originally Posted by mommy22boys

I want my 6month old to fall asleep on his own, not while breastfeeding or being walked around, rocked, etc.

My DD#1 could never do this (no matter how hard I tried). But, it's super easy with my DD#2 as long as I swaddle her, give her a pacifier and lie next to her and snuggle her. The swaddling really calms her, and she'll often lie wide awake in bed like that for 20 minutes (as long as I'm next to her). She does sleep her longest stretches when she falls asleep like that.

Thought it might be worth a try.

[mommy22boys]

Thanks, i can try swaddling him, he used to sleep good like that before, I just stopped doing it for some reason. I haven't given him a pacifier though, so it might work without that, but like you said it's worth a try.

[sweetpeppers]

Originally Posted by kdescalzi

IMO, the baby whisperer is a horrible book that is very anti-AP. I read it when ds was born and I really did try following it because I thought it was the "right"thing to do. Eventually I realized that it went against my heart and how I wanted to parent. When I was pg with dd I threw the book out. I feel it is a form of CIO in the sense that she incourages you to not listen to your childs needs but to put forth your own needs ahead of them. Just my 2 bits but I hated the book and would definately recommend the NCSS or one of Dr. Sears's books. I worried about parenting my ds to sleep so much that I was always stressed...this time around with dd I do whatever works...just go with your heart.

My mom gave this to me as a new mother and it totally undermined my instincts. I think the pick up/put down method may be even worse than CIO, because it has to be so frustrating and confusing for the baby. I regret that I ever saw the book, and ever attempted to take it's advice. Hours of frustration and heartache for both of us were the only results I got. Thank goodness I got fed up and returned to our happy family bed (which she is totally against). And then I found out about attachment parenting, and stopped worrying why my son wasn't sleeping through the night.

[almadianna]

Originally Posted by mommy22boys

Thanks, i can try swaddling him, he used to sleep good like that before, I just stopped doing it for some reason. I haven't given him a pacifier though, so it might work without that, but like you said it's worth a try.

It might also be a good idea to remember that the baby is just 6 months old so its possible that no matter what you try, it just might not work. Your baby is still... well.. a baby.