So... how do you encourage baby to come LATER?

[lunita1]

Can I just take all of the advice for readying my body for labor, and just do the opposite?

My MIL and nephew will be staying in my home as houseguests until a little over 2 weeks past my due date. My first three were born between their due dates and one week past. I would really really like to keep baby in as long as possible, as I'm dreading sharing my home with a teen nephew and a MIL during my postpartum transition period. Their visit dates can't be altered at all (long story, but it's really not flexible) but I'm hoping I can at least make myself feel like I'm doing all I can to keep baby in. A week or two sounds tolerable, but the idea of sharing my home with them for baby's first month just makes me want to cry. I do NOT want a 38 weeker! I don't think I'm likely to have one, but, well, who knows...

[Smokering]

I'm not sure it works that way, unfortunately. Baby comes when it comes... and that's really not something I'd want to mess with, as postmaturity is not a good thing. The placenta only "lasts" for so long.

Is there absolutely no way your MIL and nephew could stay in a hotel or something if the baby arrived when they were around? I wouldn't want to be in that situation either!

[Veritaserum]

Anxiety/stress can prevent/stall labor. It's not uncommon for women to go into labor after houseguests leave. I've used the Hypnobabies Baby Stay In track for preterm labor issues and I've talked to my babies about coming a certain day or later. I don't know how effective that would be past your due date, though....

[AnnieNimIty]

I totally feel for you... Even if you completely got along with them and they were perfect house guests I think it would be too much after a new baby who you would want to get to know.

I don't know how you could keep the baby in but I would try and suggest that they get a hotel after the baby is born... Like while you are in labor have your husband tell them to wait for you at the hotel and you will call them when you get home.

My question is how did they get the invitation initially?

ETA. Oh... actually, the more I think about "Can I just take all of the advice for readying my body for labor, and just do the opposite? "
The more I think that would be just about all you can do.
No sex, minimal walking... Like put yourself on bedrest.

[prancie]

You shouldn't have to deal with this stress while having a baby. Cancel the visit totally. Tell them to come in a few months, or never, whatever suits you best!

You are well within your rights a person and a new mother to not have unwanted people intruding on your time with new baby.

[lunita1]

Prancie et al,
thanks for understanding but canceling is totally not an option as much as I wish it was. They will be staying in my home for 12 weeks, beginning today (I'm 30 weeks pregnant.) They are visiting from overseas, and it is a visit that was planned literally years ago, and the timing is unrelated to the baby's arrival (it coincides with the southern hemisphere's summer vacation.) They don't drive, speak English or have money for a hotel (we are covering the entire cost of their trip), and we are in a suburban area with no real useful public transportation. Them going to a hotel isn't an option (or at least isn't a practical one... it would be complicated and expensive for us and pretty miserable for them since they'd pretty much be stuck there). Their tickets can't be changed and even if they could be, the economics of traveling to/from their part of the world (and the fact that it is ALWAYs a cost shouldered by us, not them) means that they probably won't see baby again until he's two or three.

So anyway... none of that is related to birth. I'm stuck with house guests. Period. The best I can do is hope that they'll be here for just the baby's first week or two rather than for baby's whole first month and then spend plenty of time sequestered in my room with the door closed for privacy. I'll stick to my delusion that since the others were born at 40 wks, 40 wks 5 days and 41 wks, I have a good chance of going past my do date (please don't tell me stories about having an early baby after three on time or late ones. I'll cover my ears and sing lalalalala. LOL)

[MittensKittens]

This may sound "way out there", but I do believe it can work in some cases. If it does not work, you will have lost nothing. Why not try talking to your baby and ask them to stay in there till 40 weeks at least? The very fact you feel uncomfortable with your house guests might delay your baby. I certainly feel that my labor was delayed for a few days because of external factors (less than ideal situation inside the apartment which lasted a few days). Good luck! Sorry to hear that you will have to share your babymoon with house guests.

[MyBoysBlue]

Originally Posted by Veritaserum

Anxiety/stress can prevent/stall labor.

Kinda off topic but this is why the birth scene in the new Star Trek bugs the heck out of me. I'm a geek I admit it.

I'm a bit confused. You want to try and make it to 42 or 43 weeks? I think eventually you won't be able to postpone labour but in the short term stress and house guests can stall it for a time.

[flapjack]

I've had one labour stall out due to stress- went from 4cm to holding a baby in 3 contractions. I don't think that ST was necessarily inaccurate, and wouldn't wish that on anyone...

OP, I agree with MittensKittens: I think that to an extent, your mind can control when you labour. This time round, I was consciously trying to hang on until the start of the school holidays for Christmas, which was 40+2. Baby was born at 40+4. Last time, after the stressful stop-start adrenaline labour, I somehow manifested a labour that started with my waters breaking so that I'd know that baby was actually coming out that day...
I realise this sounds impossibly unlikely, but if you write your baby's birth story in your head, with a date, and the best case scenario for what you want your MIL to do, it's worth a try.

[at_the_hip]

With my 4 so far, I have gone over... #1 was 9 days, #2 was 6 days, and #4 was 7 days...HOWEVER with #3 the situation was really stressful as my midwife was away and dh working, and other issues, and she did indeed stay put until things were 'safe' to be born. She came 13 days after my due date, biggest baby but very healthy and well. If you went that late, they would only be around for a few days, right? Or even if it was about a week over, would it be just a week with guests? I think it will be important for your dh to back you up and share your expectations of privacy - help is appreciated with the home, cleaning, meals, etc rather than the baby, kwim? Is there no other family in the area they can visit for at least a few days once you have the babe?
kind regards,
Cindy