odds and ends and MIL's

[gabeyho]

So far for me, the closer I get the more comfortable and confident I am with the decision I have made for a UC. A few people are convinced I should be really worried about how things will go, but I am just not worried at all and I am very confident that everything is going to turn out beautifully. Even my wonderful dh is 100% on board with me at this point. The only nagging thing (which I feel really stupid about, right now) is that I never bothered to order a few supplies I would have liked to have, and I feel like it is probably too late at this point, but for some reason I am obsessed with what I should use to tie off the umbilical cord....I'm just not sure, and feel silly for it, but I really want to have something set aside specifically for that! Any suggestions?

The only other little hang-up is that I told my MIL last week what my plans for birth were, and I am really surprised at her very unsupportive reaction. I don't know why I waited so late to tell her, I really didn't have a good reason since I thought she would be ok with it, but I had to tell her since she is the one who is going to watch the other kids when the time comes. She has actually offered to pay for a midwife to be present, just to put her mind at ease, and is loudly voicing her opinion that I am being reckelss, irresponsible, smug, and condescending!! She actually called a few different midwives in the area...they are not easy to find, I don't know how she managed to get a hold of them!! PLUS, the one mw who is available and likely willing to take me on at this point I met a few years back and am not comfortable with, but my MIL doesn't really think it's that important.

SO, while she has said she will respectfully disagree with me, and can not support my decision, but will still be helpful as much as she can.....something tells me from past experience this will not be the last I hear about it.

By the way...Happy New Year!

[zoebird]

happy new year!

we didn't have anything to tie off the cord. after a few hours (or maybe just an hour or so), the thing is white and limp and these little "beads" form i the cord. cut between two beads, and it's naturally closed and clamped.

we waited about 9 hrs before cutting Hawk's cord--i was considering doing a lotus birth, but it felt right to cut the cord when we woke the morning after. so, that's what we did. i call it "half lotus." (it's funny because we do a lot of half-lotus poses in yoga.)

if you really want something, consider natural yarn or embroidery thread. it's pretty easy to get ahold of at the craft store, and i guess you can steam it in a pot or something if you feel you need to (i would).

as for your MIL, it's up to you if you can live with "respectfully disagree" but you'll also have to agree with your DH that he will "manage his mother" and if need be, be willing to tell her to get out.

[cathicog]

You might want to think of having someone else there to watch your other children. Sounds like her attitude could cause problems for you during labor...

[gabeyho]

She's not actually going to be at our home while I am in labor, she will be taking the kids to her home, which is down the street. So she will be at our house very briefly, likely with a frown on her face, and then gone just as quickly. I really don't anticipate her trying to interfere during, since she has made her opinion known; I do anticipate still hearing about it at least a few times after the fact, though.

[zoebird]

but after the fact, it won't matter.

i'll be entirely honest: my family had their qualms. they voiced it, but they were "supportive" (agree to disagree). after the birth, they said nothing save that they were really proud of me, glad i hadn't gone to a hospital, etc. they even tell others that he was a UC/Freebirth with a lot of pride.

so, even if you do hear about it after, it won't mater so much.

and, hopefully, you won't even see her when she stops by to pick up the kids.

[Faliciagayle]

For DDs birth we clamped the cord with a shoelace I had previously boiled.

about the MIL

[earthnut]

If I were doing a UC, I'd probably do a lotus birth - not cut the cord at all.

[gabeyho]

Well I have good news on my MIL. After a few emails back and forth today (we always work things out this way, it's very productive) she has decided that I'm not so nuts, and she still has her reservations, but is actually a little excited about it, esp. since we live so close to a hospital if need be. I am thrilled! I figured she would be the coolest about it, since she is the one in my life who is all about alternative methods, unconventional approaches to medicine, letting the body heal itself, total health nut....you get the pic. SO, I just had to convince her to not blab about it to every person she knows, which is a lot of people and she tends to blab, and she agreed with me on that since it is not something most people will react, ummm...kindly, to, and she doesn't want their negative reactions freaking her out. She wants to tell the whole world about it afterwards once she has a positive story to tell, so I think I won her over! YAY!

Thanks for your support!

[earthnut]

Wow! That's such good news!

[inertia]

That's wonderful news! I'm glad you can get everybody on board that you want to be.

Its silly when you expect people to be supportive and then they totally aren't. I believe its best to be honest though, even if it makes the journey that much more difficult. There is nothing to be ashamed of when it comes to UC.