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Why don't you just -insert home based creative business here-

post #1 of 42
Thread Starter 
Ever since I started telling people I was planning on being a stay at home mom I've been getting advice on starting a little business. Why do people keep telling me this and when I am I suposed to get all this done?

Granted I did study graphic design at one point with the intent of doing it from home but my training is now ten years out of date (they still taught paste up!). Yeah, I like to sew and my mom keeps telling me to sell slings. I'm the only person she knows who uses them so she thinks it's original. LOL

I know a bunch of stay at home moms with creative businesses. More power to them! My WOtH job crushed my creative spirit and I just don't see how having to draw or sew etc is going to get my juices flowing again. The one thing that sort of peaks my interest is using my research on historical toys to make toys to sell to reenactors. However, that crazy CPSIA law keeps me from chasing that dream for now.

The time issue is huge. My sister is working on a jewelry making business and she spends a good chunk of her weekends at craft fairs. That's family time. I'm doing this to have more time with my family.

Thank you for letting me vent. It seems like 2 solid weeks of family get togethers and I'm just sick of the kind suggestions. Now I can't sleep.
post #2 of 42
I got this a lot, too. I'm certified in massage therapy, so people used to ask me all the time when I was going to start "working on the side." Five years and three kids later, they've stopped asking.

I think it reflects how little parenting is valued in our society. "You're JUST raising kids??" It's annoying, sad, and frustrating sometimes, but I know how important my job is, so I try not to let it bother me.

Another example - my sister is a SAHM to six kids under 5. She had triplets this past June and has three older children (all under 5 years old). She was an attorney before she had kids. My FIL was here for Christmas and asked me whether my sister "was back at work yet?" I practically fell out of my seat. Are you kidding me??
post #3 of 42
Yeah, I get this too. MIL keeps asking if I am going to go back and be a teacher when my kids are older or do some computer work on the side. Right now, I feel my hands are full with a 7yo DS on autism spectrum and 4yo DD and being 36 weeks pg with #3. I DON'T KNOW what I am doing 5 or 6 years from now!
post #4 of 42
I get asked about freelancing all the time. And occasionally, I even freelance. What's nice is that, once the project is done, it's done and I can not work again until I want. Then, when people ask, I say I "occasionally pick up freelance work." But in truth, I'd rather stay home and stay focused. I hate the deadlines and pressure.
post #5 of 42
Yeah it's annoying. They don't tell daycare workers or teachers about awesome side job opportunities- why do they suggest them to us?

I had a home based business, and it's awfully stressful and hard to swing if you're the primary caregiver and your partner works long hours.
post #6 of 42
I would love a creative side job or something I could do from home to make some money. My daughter is almost four and likes being near me and not interacting or even on her own for several hours a day (the rest of the time it's pretty intense). I WISH someone would put me on to something I could do from home.
post #7 of 42
Quote:
Originally Posted by Masel View Post
I'm doing this to have more time with my family.
I would just tell them that, with a quizzical look on my face, like "Hello? How is that a good idea??" and repeat the exact phrase over and over until they let the issue drop.
post #8 of 42
I just tell them that I have one full time job already I don't need another!
post #9 of 42
Hi OP....I'm a WOHM but I'm on a "work/life balance" program at work which technically allows me flexibility to to do work at home when needed. Gotta say...that's the funniest thing I've ever heard of...not in a humorous way but in all due sarcasm...ha, ha.

I have to give my hats off to all the WAHMs out there...cause I don't know how they do it! Having a young child, I find it impossible to work at home. Maybe its a personality thing...maybe its a time management or parenting kind of thing...I don't know. I know that I can't get anything (as in work related) done at home. My attention is totally on DD during the periods that I'm at home.
post #10 of 42
Quote:
Originally Posted by berry987 View Post
I think it reflects how little parenting is valued in our society. "You're JUST raising kids??" It's annoying, sad, and frustrating sometimes, but I know how important my job is, so I try not to let it bother me.
post #11 of 42
CatsCradle, I had that option, too...technically. It was accepted by my supervisors, and they were great, but it was clearly not accepted by all my coworkers, and since I was part of teams for my job, it just didn't work. Also, conference calling for meetings and locking myself into a bedroom for an hour and a half at a time didn't really work with the at-home concept, and I don't do my best work when my kids are here demanding my attention. My dh works on the road a lot, which makes me solo parent for weeks at a time, and the whole thing would often become simply too much for one person.

I am realizing that I really *like* taking care of the family as my job.
post #12 of 42
Thread Starter 
You know I think what aggravates me about this is that they considere my creativity only suitable for pin money. Like I couldn't make any real money. Grrrrrr. When I have time and energy again I want to do it right.
post #13 of 42
I was a nanny and then teacher in my pre-baby life, so a lot of people assume I want to watch kids in my home now that I am a SAHM. My DH had even mentioned it several times.

I keep explaining that watching kids in our home would (to me) void the point of me BEING a SAHM. I would be stuck in my house, I wouldn't be able to take DD to story time, playdates, pool, library, LLL, etc. The entire reason I wanted to be a SAHM was to do fun things like that and if I took in extra kids, I wouldn't be able to do those things.

I told DH if we needed money, I would much rather go back to work teaching and make twice as much and have adult interaction than be stuck at home all week.
post #14 of 42
Quote:
Originally Posted by CatsCradle View Post
Hi OP....I'm a WOHM but I'm on a "work/life balance" program at work which technically allows me flexibility to to do work at home when needed. Gotta say...that's the funniest thing I've ever heard of...not in a humorous way but in all due sarcasm...ha, ha.

I have to give my hats off to all the WAHMs out there...cause I don't know how they do it! Having a young child, I find it impossible to work at home. Maybe its a personality thing...maybe its a time management or parenting kind of thing...I don't know. I know that I can't get anything (as in work related) done at home. My attention is totally on DD during the periods that I'm at home.
When I worked from home (several years, ranging from 10 to 20 hours a week) I only did it while my DH or a babysitter was here. I agree, it's too hard - and, I think, unfair to the children and to the employer, to try to do both at once.
post #15 of 42
My FIL does this to me EVERY time I see him. He keeps asking me what my next door neighbor, who is a sahm as well, would charge to watch my daughter?! He also is always full of job ideas for me. It is really sad that people don't understand that this IS my job. It is my life, and it is my DREAM. GASP! Why would any woman chose do this? Ugh, makes me want to bang my head against a wall. lol
post #16 of 42
This happens to me too
post #17 of 42
I get it too! But I would love to do something of the sort, we'll see when DS is older...
post #18 of 42
I'm already getting comments and I havent' had the baby yet. I had just moved in with the man (after relocating from across country) and planned on getting a regular ole job when I found out I was pregnant. Didn't make much sense to do something permanent at that point...and I do not intend on letting anyone else watch my peanut while I go out to work. I told my mom I was strapping the baby onto my body and finding whateve work I can that will allow me the privilege of taking care of my own child myself, and she's the only one who's been supportive of that.

Everyone else is all full of helpful "suggestions" on what I should do and how I should do it, most of all the man's mother. Who I want to strangle sometimes with what comes out of her mouth.

From the existence of this thread, I suppose the comments won't be stopping anytime soon. You all have some good suggestions on how to reply. I just hope I don't get too testy and start yelling at people! Nurturing a child is the most important thing any woman or man can do...why don't people understand that anymore?
post #19 of 42

Why don't you just do daycare? Why don't you just take in foster kids? There's money in that!

That's what I got from my MIL. She does day care out of her home, and she's good at it and enjoys it for the most part. When I quit my job and became a sahm she urged me several times to do daycare. I think I actually laughed out loud the first time. Didn't mean to be rude but daycare is the last thing I would do. I was having a hard enough time adjusting to motherhood with my own child, dealing with impatience and feelings of inadequacy. Why in the world would I take in other people's children??

FIL used to run a foster placement agency and they frequently had foster kids of their own. They urged me to do that, as well. I don't think they ever understood what a bad idea that was. Sometimes I felt like I was a step away from having my kids taken from me and put in foster care! (I have better perspective now. I was no where near that bad off.)
post #20 of 42
I've been a SAHM for 8+yrs now. During that time I did go to nursing school to get my LPN, I took the majority of my classes part-time or less... lots of 1 class this quarter type of thing until I got into the year long program. For me it was important to have a skill to fall back on should anything ever happen. I plan to get my RN in the future. I get asked alot when I "plan" to get a job. More so now since DD2 is 4 and we have no plans for more. If the right part-time day shift at a drs office job came along then I would take it.


I have alot of friends that are SAHMs and have side businesses. One is a hairdresser make-up artist, another sells avon, another marykay, another does Maleluca and another is a yarn dyer/knitter etc... To each their own. I'm not a seller and while I love to sew, needle felt, wet felt and just about anything fiber related I don't want to make it a job.


When DD1 was 3mo-10mo old I did crochet hats wholesale for a online baby shoppe. I made about $900 during that time and that was fun. I did it mostly snuggling with my baby in my lap.
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