Wanting But Waiting Tribe *2010* - Page 13

[Neuromancer]

Originally Posted by echospiritwarrior

Chelci

I certainly get the O time crazies!

DH told me late last night that he was finally on board to TTC! I think we're both scared about it but ready. Because of where I am in my cycle and how long they are, it looks like we still have to wait a full month before trying but hopefully the time will fly by.

I just like so many of you was full of heartbreak. I quietly mentioned here and there, and then I wrote him a letter. Finally, it looks like we're going in. I really pray that you will all get to experience the joy of the filp.

Good luck mammas!

Echospiritwarrior, that's great news. "Scared of it but ready" sounds like a lovely place to be. That's where I'm aiming. I hope the next month goes quickly for you.

[echospiritwarrior]

Thanks Neuro, this is our first intentionally planned, so that seems so frightening and at the same time so exciting!

[pinkgeek]

Wanted to post a quick update. I had my u/s on Friday morning and got a voice mail from my gyn that afternoon that it was normal, as was all my blood work. So, YAY!!! Hopefully the random missing period was just a fluke. I definitely had EWCM this past week, and some cramping/poking feelings, so maybe that was O and things are back on cycle.

I will probably have my gyn run the bloodwork again on CD3 and I ordered OPK dip sticks (reminds me of checking the oil in the car!) so next cycle I can start trying those too.

[Brown Lioness]

for Oing, pinkgeek!

Originally Posted by pinkgeek

Wanted to post a quick update. I had my u/s on Friday morning and got a voice mail from my gyn that afternoon that it was normal, as was all my blood work. So, YAY!!! Hopefully the random missing period was just a fluke. I definitely had EWCM this past week, and some cramping/poking feelings, so maybe that was O and things are back on cycle.

I will probably have my gyn run the bloodwork again on CD3 and I ordered OPK dip sticks (reminds me of checking the oil in the car!) so next cycle I can start trying those too.

So, my inclinations about hubby was right, he's baby fevering just about as hard as I am, lol. So basically, our financials are the ONLY thing keeping us from babydom at this point. With good reason tho, we just moved to Texas so hubby has to quit his job in MD to move down here with me and search for a new one or get his freelance graphic design popping. So until then it will just be my job's income. Im also tryna get my biz off the ground here now that ive moved and ideally, i want to be able to be self-reliant on my biz income, so that I can quit the j.o.b. Oh and also we have to climb out of the mountain of debt that was amassed while hubby was laid off all of 2009.

Anywho, knowing that he's got baby fever makes me feel better. Helps me not feel so alone.

[Neuromancer]

Originally Posted by Brown Lioness

for Oing, pinkgeek!

So, my inclinations about hubby was right, he's baby fevering just about as hard as I am, lol. So basically, our financials are the ONLY thing keeping us from babydom at this point. With good reason tho, we just moved to Texas so hubby has to quit his job in MD to move down here with me and search for a new one or get his freelance graphic design popping. So until then it will just be my job's income. Im also tryna get my biz off the ground here now that ive moved and ideally, i want to be able to be self-reliant on my biz income, so that I can quit the j.o.b. Oh and also we have to climb out of the mountain of debt that was amassed while hubby was laid off all of 2009.

Anywho, knowing that he's got baby fever makes me feel better. Helps me not feel so alone.

That's great that you're on the same page (or similar pages, at least). My husband's a freelance graphic designer, too, so I know how that goes. It was scary when he quit his job to go freelance! Good luck to you both in your career pursuits!

[samy23]

I'm starting to rethink ttc again this year. I had it in my mind I would HAVE to wait until next year, but things have changed some what and I may start trying again this year instead.

I'm thinking possibly from September again. Which is when I ttc last year, sept-nov...with no success. Maybe this time I will have more luck? I'm still going to be using my sperm donor guy.

The waiting is so so hard. So I have another 3 months to be 100% sure. I keep going back and forth on this yk? I feel pulled in both directions, to try ASAP, and to wait until next year....arghhh

[LovelyBella]

Hello everyone!

I'm glad to be here. Me and my soon to be hubby really wanted to have a baby. We both love kids and crazy as it is, we even have our baby names already. But we feel that we can't afford yet to have a baby, so we are waiting maybe until 2011. We're actually getting married in August and I am so excited for that.

Well in case I get pregnant unexpectedly, we would welcome the baby with all our hearts! =)

[Brown Lioness]

Welp, it looks like Im the last of my high school crowd to be child-less. My friend from high school (that ive neglected to call back lol) just posted a facebook update last night with her big belly.

Im happy for her, jealous for me, but kinda meh at looking forward to being the "old mom" of the group once i finally get there, lol.

[M.Q.]

we even have our baby names already

We do too!

It's actually come to very practical steps for us now: what credit cards to pay off in what order, what home improvements and in what order and how much will that cost and how will we pay for that, what might next year's tax refund look like,when can we sell stocks without short term holdings penalties and what to do with that money.... We have our new mattress picked out and next we pick out bedroom furniture (I refuse to bring a baby into the chaos that is our blended bedroom) then we pay off our appliances (bought fridge, dishwasher, stove, washer, dryer all in 1 day when we bought a historic home that had none) and buy the furniture and mattress, then we get to BD on our new bed and bring on the future Anna or Kevin

The thing that's stressing him out is that I am NEVER going to voluntarily walk into a hspital for pregnancy related things. I patently refuse to be strapped to a bed, violated by a stranger's hands (and by stranger I mean ANYONE who isn't DH) or a foreign objects, 'pitted' and 'sectioned' as though I were a piece of fruit, and treated generally as though I am not as intelligent as someone with letters after their name. I know that there are hospitals and OBs who are not like I am describing here, but maybe coming across one who is like that just isn't a risk I'm willing to take. This means I MUST give birth before I'm 35. If I reach 'advanced maternal age' it will be difficult (I understand) to find a hands-off midwife to take me on as a client. So now he has a very definite time line, too.

Maybe next year....

-MQ

[Mummoth]

hi!

I'm joining in here, if you don't mind! We talk about having a baby... there's a lot we need to do before it can happen... but we hope for an oops! If everything goes how we hope it will, we could start trying in late 2011. If it doesn't happen by mid-2012 (when I turn 35/SO will turn 39) we'll be accepting that it isn't meant to be. It would be SO's first/only biological child, so his sense of urgency is a lot greater than mine. I had decided I was done having kids with DS/DD's biodad. With SO it's actually a partnership, so sharing parenthood with an enthusiastically involved person is a new experience for me. The thought of a baby isn't nearly as daunting.

[steedalyn]

Hi everyone, I was going to join the CTA group since we are charting but really I fit better in this group I think since DH and I would both like to TTC but for financial reasons are waiting until he gets a job. Anyway, I am on day 30 something of my first PP cycle and having very fertile signs for 5 days now. I just wish we could try for a baby!

[Betnybaby]

Hi.
I'm gonna join in because me and my DH are at this point too. We are talking about ttc in feb 2011 but that still seems like ages away most days. DH is studying to be an early childhood teacher and is almost as clucky as I am, which helps, but we want him to be a bit further through his study before we TTC.
So for now i'm just learning lots and holding my friends babies lots

[Neuromancer]

Last night, my husband got a little tipsy at a party and told me he thinks he's ready and that maybe we shouldn't use backup methods when I go off the pill in a month...

Let's see if this sticks.

In the meantime, I'd better get some fillings. I've been putting off dental visits for a year out of sheer laziness.

[sparklett]

Does it ever stop HURTING????

*sigh*......

there's another pregnancy in my circle of friends. My DS is 3 and I'm 33 and wanted to be pregnant by now, but our lives just aren't working out that way. It looks like another baby is a good two years away.

We're trying to be so responsible and wait to have a baby when our lives are back to being stable. We're both jobless right now but we're always sooooo tempted to just cash out some investments and live off that and have another baby. Instead, we pretend like our investments don't exist and have instead taken cost-cutting measures like inviting my parents to live with us while I look for a job.

But even thought I KNOW we're doing the right thing, it still hurts, over and over again, when people around us are getting pregnant.

I'm trying to learn how to be happy with the very, very good life I have right now and try to keep reminding myself that I am making the best choices for my family... I'm finishing my second master's in just over a year from now and then starting a PhD program that will be almost 100% paid for by a fellowship. And there's some great job prospects and relocation opportunities ahead. Plus, my DH is on a very solid path himself right now and I'm very proud of him. DS is so very happy, sociable and smart..... but sometimes all of this is overshadowed by the GIANT, GAPING HOLE in our lives that will someday be filled by another baby.

Okay, vent over. I was bummed by the news of this friend's pregnancy, so for the first time in my life I'm pulling out some investments (just a tiny bit, I promise!!) and taking the family on a trip to St. Croix this winter, which is just about when all these babies are due.

[sparklett]

Originally Posted by Brown Lioness

Welp, it looks like Im the last of my high school crowd to be child-less. My friend from high school (that ive neglected to call back lol) just posted a facebook update last night with her big belly.

Im happy for her, jealous for me, but kinda meh at looking forward to being the "old mom" of the group once i finally get there, lol.

I hate that feeling... I try so hard to be happy for other people and remind myself that I'm just on a different path, but it still hurts. Sorry mama. You'll get there.

[Brown Lioness]

Aw, thank you

Originally Posted by sparklett

I hate that feeling... I try so hard to be happy for other people and remind myself that I'm just on a different path, but it still hurts. Sorry mama. You'll get there.

[M.Q.]

And it's bad enough when it's decent, kind, thoughtful, educated, partnered, responsible people that get pregnant and have babies when you have an ache in your whole being you want a baby so bad... but there is scarcely a day I don't see some 15-16 year old girl sporting a baby bump and it makes me sick. I see those MTV shows (16 and pregnant, Teen Mom) and it's like I'm watching a train wreck- I can't look away. It's just unfair that I could have a baby right now (I could have LOT of children by now, in fact) had I chosen to be so irresponsible. But instead I have been responsible and not had a baby when I couldn't have given him or her the home I feel they will deserve and now that I have that home DH still wants to be 'responsible' and wait until we have all of our debt paid off and a giant savings account. Jeepers. I have read more than one place that waiting until you're financially ready for children means that you'll probably never have any: that you should wait until you're emotionally ready to have children and then start trying.

Well, I've been emotionally ready to have children since I got pregnant last summer. Grrrr.
-MQ

[Baby_Cakes]

s MQ. It's so tough. You'll get there. You're right that there will never be the "perfect time", but there are always better times than others. When it's meant to be, it'll be. For me what helps is thinking that the child I'm meant to have isn't ready to meet me yet, or that I'm not ready to meet him/her. That maybe I have to grow a little or learn something first in order to be his/her mother. Eh, it's corny, but sometimes it helps me with the wait.

I had the most vivid dream last night that I POAS and it was a ridiculously dark and fast BFP. OMG it was a crazy pg test too, it was like plaid and striped, wtf is that? Anyway I was excited but scared b/c I knew DH and I weren't trying, that we'd been careful and it happened anyway. I had no idea how to tell him! LOL. Then I woke up and was like, Hmm, maybe I should test -- forgetting for a moment that AF is here and there's no way. Hah! I will laugh about this one for awhile.

[OSTC]

Hey is it okay if I join you guys?

I'm currently doing a 4 week total body cleanse w/ my husband and then my naturopath wants me to do 1-3 months of metal cleansing as I have fairly high levels of cadmium... Which means I could have up to 4 months before I can start ttc, which I know doesn't sound long to a lot of people... but I've wanted to have another baby since ds2 was about 9 months (and he is now 14 months) and everyday I fight with myself to keep w/ the cleansing instead of just giving in and trying to get pg...

[Neuromancer]

OSTC, welcome. That's very disciplined of you! I don't even want to wait to get fillings and see my doctor once before TTC, so I can't imagine doing a total body cleanse and multi-month metal cleanse! Here's to time flying.