Okay, I admit it - 4 is hard! - Page 2

[LizLizard]

It really seems like you either deal with this in the 3's or 4's, depending on the kiddo. My oldest is 3.5 and is firmly entrenched in it all. There's a lot going on now though... she's dropping her nap, she's refusing to eat most days (once she went 6 days without eating, no joke) and if she doesn't eat, she's a total BEAR to deal with. Nonsense words, yelling and screaming, constant movement including pacing around, wanting me to play with her from the minute she gets up until the minute she goes to bed but yet won't play ANYTHING I suggest, nonstop arguing, etc.

But yet, every once in a while the stars align and she EATS, she NAPS, she's content and happy playing by herself, and will even do crafts with Mom. I know they're all related, and I assume they're related to the eating but who knows, chicken or egg.....

This is one of the bad days, and go figure, she hasn't eaten anything since lunch yesterday. They must be related. Wish I could find that magic food.

Oh, this is also the age of "What did you say?" All.Day.Long. I've told DH that I feel like I'm talking to an 80 year old with an ear horn. I've tried answering with "You heard me" but then she argues "I DIDN'T hear you Mom, say it again, I DIDN'T hear you" over and over again. Sigh.

Anyways, this has been going on for many months, I'm just counting down the days until she hits 4 and it magically goes away... ho ho ho.

[klt]

Originally Posted by babsbob

I am nearing the end of age 4 and approaching age 5! Yikes, I don't know yet if 5 will be much better.

I wanted to offer some suggestions that helped me and you can take them or leave them - but just to get ideas, etc.

Thanks for writing all of this...it's a mirror of my life, and makes things seems o doable when I read it here.

[kkfum]

Originally Posted by honeybunmom

My mother says I was not like this, but, rather, a very easy child. Makes me wonder whether something environmentally is causing this type of behavior in our children? I mean, were kids always like this at this age?

nak...
i just had my 4 yo dd's and myself tested for vit d levels on a hunch...they were very low. even low by mainstream med standards (below 30). as a kid, i was outside all the time. i hate to admit that i really didn't get dd outside during the warmer months as i should have. i was sleep-deprived and grumpy (and probably deficient then, too) and we'd go days w/o proper amount of sunlight.

we're supplementing now above rda levels, so we'll see if it makes a difference. check out vitamindfoundation.com or the vitamin d council's website (not quackery...real doctors/scientists). incredible video presentation by dr. vieth...worth viewing.

just a thought...especially for those whose kids have cavities and/or darker skin color and/or live in northern climates.

[NicaG]

Yeah, 4 is driving me a little nuts, though generally ds is a sweet kid. I think part of the problem is that he's an extrovert and I'm an introvert, so the constant questions all day start to drive me batty. Also, ds has a habit of badgering--asking the same question over and over, and not giving me a chance to respond. We've been working on it though. Sometimes I just tell him I need a few minutes of quiet, with no questions.

Food issues are driving me a little batty too. Ds has always been somewhat picky, but it's getting worse. For fruits and veggies, he'll pretty much only eat broccoli, tomatoes, grapes, cantaloupe, sometimes pears or apples, once in a while oranges. Seems like the list gets smaller every day.

Ds still has pants-wetting accidents fairly regularly. He just isn't that interested in staying dry--he'd rather be playing. I was hoping this would be over by now.

I do like watching his speech develop--all the sudden it seems like he can express a lot of really sophisticated ideas verbally, and it's fun to talk to him.

He likes to tell me that when he grows up, he's not going to move away, he wants to live in the same house with us forever, even when he's grown up.

And ds is very good with his little sister most days. Thank goodness they don't fight more!

Re: doctors and dentists....ds has a mortal fear of anyone (besides family) touching his head, face, etc. So he freaks out at the doctor, getting his hair cut, etc. We did manage to find a fabulous pediatric dentist, and they were really good at providing small "prizes" for each step in getting a cleaning. Ds actually loved it! So it's worth asking around, maybe there's something similar in your area.

For me, 3 was harder, because I couldn't reason with ds, and his verbal skills weren't as good....and we had a new baby in the house. 4 has been hard but manageable. Ds turns 5 in April!

[lyterae]

Today dd had a meltdown during drop-off at daycare, and then apparently took another childs muffin at breakfast and wouldn't give it up even after she was told it contained dairy. I only was notified of the muffin because it contains dairy and she reacts (luckily nothing life threatening).

She was sick on Tuesday and still very clingy yesterday (we stayed home these days together). It sounds like she still needs some hugs tonight, I was hoping we'd gotten past the worst of it.

[honeybunmom]

Originally Posted by kkfum

nak...
i just had my 4 yo dd's and myself tested for vit d levels on a hunch...they were very low. even low by mainstream med standards (below 30). as a kid, i was outside all the time. i hate to admit that i really didn't get dd outside during the warmer months as i should have. i was sleep-deprived and grumpy (and probably deficient then, too) and we'd go days w/o proper amount of sunlight.

we're supplementing now above rda levels, so we'll see if it makes a difference. check out vitamindfoundation.com or the vitamin d council's website (not quackery...real doctors/scientists). incredible video presentation by dr. vieth...worth viewing.

just a thought...especially for those whose kids have cavities and/or darker skin color and/or live in northern climates.

Getting outside definitely makes a difference for us. When I was home on maternity leave all summer, I definitely saw that. We went out pretty much every day for an hour at the very least, usually much longer. We do live in the land of gray - Chicago. However, barring totally inclement wewather, dd is outside at least an hour a day at school. She's in a Waldorf program. And, thanks to papi's genes, she's "peach", unlike me. We just bought a bounce house, which, hopefully will get set up this weekend. She is really quite and active, nature loving girl. I do think that being cooped up inside is tough on her. She seems to really need to work out/burn off some energy every day and I'm hoping this bounce house will get her off of my sofa and into a safe place to do that.