From Pagan to Monotheist?

[Purple Sage]

Like the title suggests, I'm just curious if there's anyone out there who has gone from pagan/polytheist beliefs to monotheism? What did your transition look like? Why did your beliefs change?

The reason I ask is because I've recently found myself 'trying on' monotheism to see if it's a good fit. I was brought up Christian (by my grandparents; my dad is agnostic and my mom is atheist), but I stopped believing in my late teens. That's when I discovered paganism and polytheism, and I've been practicing off and on for the last 17 years, half of my life.

Well, just in the last week I've been reading a lot about Judaism (thanks to some threads in the Religious Studies forum), and I'm finding that it makes so much more sense to me than anything I've ever heard! I'm learning an entirely different way to think about monotheism, one that is answering all the questions that led me to leave Christianity.

I'm not sure what I'm getting at here. I am not in a place where I'm thinking about converting, but I am rethinking my beliefs regarding one God versus many Gods. There have been some strange 'coincidences' in my life recently, too, which are influencing me.

Anyway, I'd love to hear any personal experiences related to this kind of thing, if anyone wants to share. Thanks!!

[TulsiLeaf]

the nice thing about paganism is that it can be whatever you want. I am a pagan and I am not polytheistic. I guess you would call it monotheistic, but I dunno.

[Purple Sage]

Originally Posted by TulsiLeaf

the nice thing about paganism is that it can be whatever you want. I am a pagan and I am not polytheistic. I guess you would call it monotheistic, but I dunno.

That's also something I've been thinking about, pagan monotheism. I've never really delved into that. Can you describe what that's like for you, if you don't mind?

[javilu]

nak

i wasn't raised in a religion, but i was baptized catholic as a baby and have been exposed primarily to christian concepts of god. i spent my twenties as a sort of existential agnostic and have only recently come to accept that i do actually believe in god. i've been reading a lot about reform judaism and it really resonates with me. it's a rather different take on god than what i had been exposed to before. my experience is different from yours, but i wanted to let you know it's something i'm exploring, too.

[Purple Sage]

Originally Posted by puffnstuff

nak

i wasn't raised in a religion, but i was baptized catholic as a baby and have been exposed primarily to christian concepts of god. i spent my twenties as a sort of existential agnostic and have only recently come to accept that i do actually believe in god. i've been reading a lot about reform judaism and it really resonates with me. it's a rather different take on god than what i had been exposed to before. my experience is different from yours, but i wanted to let you know it's something i'm exploring, too.

We might not have been coming from the same direction, but it sounds like we're in much the same place now. Thanks for the company!

[wombatclay]

You may want to explore the differences between Pantheistic and Panentheistic paths within the pagan umbrella. From wikipedia:

While pantheism asserts that God and the universe are coextensive, panentheism claims that God is greater than the universe and that the universe is contained within God.

Although I do know many people who fall into the "classical" polytheistic camp... meaning they interact with and address individual gods and goddesses as discrete individuals with personal likes/dislikes/powers... I think most of the pagans I know lean more towards the sense that the different gods/goddesses are manifestations of a single being, or manifestations of the universe itself. So closer to pantheism or panentheism.

I remember a few threads here a while ago that used a disco ball analogy... one disco ball, many mirrors each reflecting a different aspect to describe the "one divine being, many faces" concept. And my personal favorite is the cookie analogy... you can make one big cookie, or many small cookies, from the dough but ultimately the cookies are made from the same dough and the variations in the final cookie depend more on shaping/baking done by people than on the dough you started with.

Anyway, have you sat down and thought about what, exactly, in the books you're reading appeals to you? Is it something specific to Judaism or is it a more general "something" that you can adapt on your own?

(oh, I was raised catholic but have been a practicing pagan for about 16 years now... and I do tend to shift between polytheistic and pantheistic perspectives every few years. My extended family is about a third Jewish, including one family member who converted directly from Catholicism.)

[TulsiLeaf]

Originally Posted by Purple Sage

That's also something I've been thinking about, pagan monotheism. I've never really delved into that. Can you describe what that's like for you, if you don't mind?

essentially I believe that the "higher" force is God/Goddess. I believe that it is one, but has two aspects. I don't worship other gods or goddesses. I follow more of the celtic lean, and while I celebrate sabbats and holy days.

[Theia]

Originally Posted by wombatclay

Although I do know many people who fall into the "classical" polytheistic camp... meaning they interact with and address individual gods and goddesses as discrete individuals with personal likes/dislikes/powers... I think most of the pagans I know lean more towards the sense that the different gods/goddesses are manifestations of a single being, or manifestations of the universe itself. So closer to pantheism or panentheism.

That is how I view it. I feel it makes sense that humans would need many gods to carry individual traits just like we do, if you are of the belief that everyone is god. (In my case I'm not sure if god is the universe or what, so I frequently interchange terms like god, source, universe, etc) So the many gods are all expressions of the one god, the source. A favorite quote of mine, I don't remember the source of it: "god is simply experiencing itself".

I did come from a Christian background and left in my teens. After that I just floated around picking up info here and there about many different religions and keeping what resonated with me. Another quote that has been really helpful to me: "Do not believe in anything simply because you have heard it. <snip: click here for the full quote>Do not believe in traditions because they have been handed down for many generations. But after observation and analysis, when you find that anything agrees with reason and is conducive to the good and benefit of one and all, then accept it and live up to it.” I'd love to include the whole quote but wasn't sure if it would violate the copyright limits on MDC.

Hope that makes sense and is relevant.

[Purple Sage]

Thanks so much for the input, mamas!

Panentheism is what resonates most with me. I've read about it before, and it makes sense to me every time I dig into it.

I think I'm just feeling like I need to connect with the Source/God/Universe on a personal level, and that's what is so attractive about Judaism. And sometimes I crave a structured religion where things are already spelled out for me and I just follow. I do love that Buddha quote, though, and it reminds me that I need to balance following the wisdom of those who have come before me with figuring things out for myself.

And I love the cookie analogy!

ETA: I didn't mean to imply that Judaism is a religion you "just follow" because I realize that it is not that way at all. Just wanted to clarify that.

[javilu]

nak

purple sage - i definitely consider myself a panentheist. god is everything, and then some. i don't personally identify with multiple gods, but i do understand how that view could also mesh with mine - they'd be refractions/masks/manifestations of the One.

i'm reading a book by a rabbi right now, called "the sacred art of lovingkindness" and it's based on seeing god in ourselves and, importantly, in others. it draws from many religious traditions, but it jewish in flavor. it's actually impacting me a lot right now and might be leading me toward a more vegetarian diet, but that's not my point. my point is, we can find advice and guidance from many paths, and judaism might be the primary one for you or me, but that doesn't mean to just swallow it down. judaism has a long history of rigorous inquiry, which really matters to me, as well as tikkun olam (repairing the world), chesed (lovingkindness) and the ineffability of god.

i think god is ultimate truth and reality, but i believe there are as many paths as their are people. some people bypass god-language altogether. some people experience god as many gods. others name god God and follow a monotheistic religion, formally or otherwise. it's all good in my book, as long as we aren't hurting anyone (and i understand that people have been hurt by religion/the religious and much harm has been done in god's name(s)). for me, i like that quote above, about once you've found something you believe in, to go with it. i don't agree with all the bible stories, or whatnot, but judaism doesn't say you have to. i just know that in my life, god has become quite apparent and i am incredibly grateful for that. i see god in my son. i see god in my family. in nature. in science. and i want to relate to that in a new way. i don't have any place where i can express this explicitly in my life right now (i am far from my family and my husband is an atheist), so i would love the community of a temple or some such. it just comes down to actually going (which is difficult, and personal, and hard to explain). but i'll go, and see how it is. i'll let you know!

[Tuesday]

Originally Posted by puffnstuff

...
i'm reading a book by a rabbi right now, called "the sacred art of lovingkindness" and it's based on seeing god in ourselves and, importantly, in others. ...
i think god is ultimate truth and reality, but i believe there are as many paths as their are people. some people bypass god-language altogether. some people experience god as many gods. others name god God and follow a monotheistic religion, formally or otherwise. it's all good in my book, as long as we aren't hurting anyone ...

Puffnstuff - thanks so much for your post. The book sounds very interesting and everything you said - very eloquent - I agree 100 percent. Beautiful - thanks for sharing your thoughts.

[DashsMama]

I was raised in a secular Christian family, went through a born-again phase during my elementary and teen years, became an eclectic pagan during college, and then discovered Judaism while in my early 30's. Judaism was so different from what I had always been taught when attending Church, and it really resonated with me. I eventually converted to Judaism. I love it but it's had it's ups and downs. I currently am more of an atheist in belief, but I still identify as a Jew. Lately I have starting to be more observant, partially because I want my children to grow up with a Jewish identity, but I also have the hope that a renewed faith will come along with the observance.

[Purple Sage]

i'm reading a book by a rabbi right now, called "the sacred art of lovingkindness" and it's based on seeing god in ourselves and, importantly, in others. it draws from many religious traditions, but it jewish in flavor.

I'm going to look for this book. It sounds wonderful.

It is so good to hear that other people are and have been going through the same sort of thing I'm going through now. I feel like this shift in perspective I'm having to monotheism is causing a tremendous amount of personal growth within myself. It's hard to explain, but it's definitely a good thing.

I'd like to give a longer response right now (so much to say!) but my inlaws are in town this weekend, so time is limited.

[Arduinna]

Originally Posted by Purple Sage

Like the title suggests, I'm just curious if there's anyone out there who has gone from pagan/polytheist beliefs to monotheism? What did your transition look like? Why did your beliefs change?

me /raises hand

I wasn't raised as a believer of anything. My parents didn't take me to Church, although I went once on rare occasions with 1 grandmother who didn't seem to be much of a believer and I went with friends sometimes by choice. I was interested in Christianity but picked up a lot of negativity about it at home. We celebrated Easter and Christmas as secular holidays.

I was a basic agnostic for years and then became a big atheist. Ended up converting to Judaism for a variety of reasons. I wanted to be part of a religious group, I ended up marrying someone that was raised Jewish, and I rejected Christianity without really knowing much about it, what it really was. I thought that since Judaism was older than Christianity it was more "true". I also thought it was important to give my daughter some sort of religious tradition. My husband wasn't that interested in practicing his families religion though and we both stopped after a few years, for different reasons.

At that point I explored Buddhism and then a variety of pagan religions. I spent a good 10 years there some of those convinced I was a hard polytheist. But the longer I was in it the more it just felt like role playing. The whole thing felt like a farce and self centered. It was all about me and what felt good. I realized I was just IDing as pagan because I wanted to be part of a group.

I went through another period of feeling agnostic and asking the big questions about the universe and God. I'd been drawn to Catholicism for awhile but I knew little of Christianity so I went on a search of learning about Christ. It was actually a natural progression from my interest in Roman polytheism, I asked myself why would they abandon their Gods and become Christian and it went from there.

What did it look like? It went back and forth a lot and for a long time, and is still going on a tiny amount. It was 1 step forward, 2 back. Then 2 steps forward and 1 back LOL. I'd have a long time question settled in my mind and then it would bring up more I never thought of. I resisted because I was afraid of who I would become. I've had a revolutionary change in world view to the point that most people were shocked. Some things I had long time believed for me personally but not knowing why, I got answers to and understand in a way I never did.

Interestingly my husband was always drawn to Catholicism also but never gave himself permission to explore it due to family pressures. He now attends mass with me.

[Purple Sage]

Arduinna, you have a very interesting story - thank you for posting it.

I'm having a good time exploring some other religions right now, religions I've never thought about with an open mind before. I'm not sure where I'll end up or if I'll be searching forever, but I am definitely getting something out of the process.

And it is very reassuring to know that there are others who can relate to going through a big shift in worldview.

[javilu]

hey purple sage. i'm nak right now, but wanted to say, i checked out a reform synagogue shabbat service a few weeks ago. it was small and sweet and beautiful. i'm currently reading "god in search of man" by abraham heschel, and it is beautiful as well. i have a constantly-running existentialism-and-theism dialogue going in my head. i'm going to a quaker meeting this sunday. it's unprogrammed and i am looking forward to the time for silent worship. i am torn, as it seems nearly impossible to follow a truly jewish path without one's spouse/household, and i don't want to set up divisions within our home. perhaps i will be a judeo-quaker, and take my readings from jewish philosophy and theology while finding a community with quakers. i don't know. i need to do something.

[honey-lilac]

I'm monotheistic pagan. It can be done.

Water's boiling for dinner but I'll be back later.

[Purple Sage]

Originally Posted by puffnstuff

hey purple sage. i'm nak right now, but wanted to say, i checked out a reform synagogue shabbat service a few weeks ago. it was small and sweet and beautiful. i'm currently reading "god in search of man" by abraham heschel, and it is beautiful as well. i have a constantly-running existentialism-and-theism dialogue going in my head. i'm going to a quaker meeting this sunday. it's unprogrammed and i am looking forward to the time for silent worship. i am torn, as it seems nearly impossible to follow a truly jewish path without one's spouse/household, and i don't want to set up divisions within our home. perhaps i will be a judeo-quaker, and take my readings from jewish philosophy and theology while finding a community with quakers. i don't know. i need to do something.

It's so funny you wrote this because this is very much the train of thought I've been having. I was just looking up Quakers the other day and spent much of last night reading about Universalism in different faiths and looking to see what's available in my area. I'm very interested in how your Quaker meeting goes. And I feel much the same way about Judaism - I love what I've read about the philosophy and theology, but I don't think my family situation is such that I could pursue that path, not right now anyway.

Originally Posted by Kaleanani

I'm monotheistic pagan. It can be done.

Water's boiling for dinner but I'll be back later.

I'd love to hear more about your faith when you have the time.

[honey-lilac]

Happily.

A silly analogy is, pretend for a minute that the All is a woman. To some people she is Mommy, to some she is Wife, to some she is Employer, to some she is Student, to some she is Daughter. Each label is "correct" but she is the sum of all those, and more. But it is hard to relate to each label all at once, so while the husband might be aware that she is all those identities, he will concentrate on the "wife" aspect a bit more than the others.

So it is with the All, but magnified a whole lot. We can't really "get" all the aspects of God, and although mystics can sit around thinking about it all day, we would like a practical way of relating to God. The various religions, in our view, are all systems that "work" for the people of a certain time, culture, place, etc. to relate to God.

We choose to focus on the Earth Mother aspect - while still recognizing that there are a lot of other ways of looking at Spirit too and they are not wrong. We personally honor the Mother, thank Her for our life, recognize that all life is from Her and to Her we will one day return, and try to live in harmony with our fellow creatures and the earth, not viewing humanity as better than animals or plants but connected to them. We celebrate the turning of the seasons and find meaning in that.

Our religion also connects us to the past, even if minimally, because our representation of the Mother is the Venus of Willendorf - although we do not know about their real religion it IS an ancient motif so it feels like we're connecting to the rest of humanity and our ancestors by having that image on our altar. And to keep us remembering what She represents, any representations of the Mother cannot have a face because She is Unknowable and more than "just" the Mother - she is the All.

Our family doesn't "do" various gods and goddesses nor do we really see them as real deities on par with Spirit itself, but rather as teaching stories or archetypes. Same thing with saints and even legends. (We don't believe Jesus was God; we don't believe that Spirit would incarnate in a human body - but we do view Jesus as a spiritual teacher.) So for example we wouldn't have the issue of whether a certain saint was "real" or a Christianized pagan goddess of old - they serve the same purpose. Heck, if someone found spiritual meaning in Spiderman or something, as long as it was meaningful to them it would be OK. I realize that this would be blasphemous to hard polytheists, but it is what it is. (We do recognize spirits and the spirit world, but we don't worship them either.) Our tradition is really flexible and can incorporate many stories/legends/etc but we don't worship these deities.

[honey-lilac]

Also, I have been Pagan-leaning for more than fifteen years now and officially Pagan for 11, and for a while I kept going back and forth between Wicca and the religion I describe above (which is what I started out with actually). Wicca had a draw on me because of the balance of masculine and feminine, which I liked. But then it got a little complicated - should I be talking to the God? The Goddess? Both? So in the end I returned to my original practice because it seemed more cohesive to me. I still think about masculine and feminine and the elements and phases of the moon and things like that - but not in the terms of a balanced God and a Goddess; they're more like energies that are around.

For a while my big mistake was to try to incorporate stuff from ALL the religions into one big pile. I studied world religions in college and every time I dove into a new faith, I realized that there were so many things that resonated with me. But in the end it got to be pretty jumbled and I realized that just because each religion had one grasp on truth it would be silly to try to combine all of them into one.