How to return unwanted gift from MIL

[Plarka]

So we have a huge talking Pooh bear dd (2.5 yrs old) got from MIL for Christmas which she is scared of and I hate. We are pretty sure we can tell where it's from, but there's not really anything I can find at that store to get instead. There's stuff I could get, but not that great.

BUT, if we tell MIL and ask her for the receipt, I can get dd some things I really know she will love from somewhere else!! I want to get her some more Kumon workbooks and Dr Seuss books, she loves them. When MIL asked about the gift on Christmas, we said she was scared and wouldn't let us take it out of the box. Then she asked a few days later if we tried again and I said no, we don't want to scare her again. So she knows.

They live so far away and never ever visit, they would never really know...but should we do it in secret or ask if they have the receipt? They might not even have it!

[mamadelbosque]

I'd ask for the receipt, assuming you have a decent relationship w/ her. Or, take it to walmart and see if they'll let you return it They don't require a receipt and just give you store credit - and surely you can find something from there that your DD would like

[Kirsten]

Anywhere that sells the Pooh bear likely also has Dr. Suess books. They have them at Target, Toys R Us, etc.

I think it is ok to exchange it if a) it is against your moral code (toy guns for example) or b) the CHILD doesn't like it or already has it. Mom thinking Montessori towers would be better doesn't override a teddy bear gift from gramma - because mom is free to buy the towers herself.

But in the OP's case, the dd is afraid of the talking bear. So I say exchange it. But I wouldn't ask for the receipt.

[daniturtle]

I wouldn't ask for the receipt, personally. And would just give away the pooh bear and don't mention it again to MIL. But I'm like that- would rather just say thank you very much and then move on rather than be potentially insulting. I probably worry too much about other people's feelings!

Maybe next year your husband/partner could mention to grandma the kinds of things your daughter DOES like (and also the kinds of things that you would like her to have ). This is a challenge for us cos we would rather not get a bunch of plastic crap from the grandparents and Thalia does not like stuffed animals but sometimes it's inevitable and I don't like to tell them what NOT to get. Instead we give suggestions on what TO get (art stuff like crayons, books, blocks, these are the kinds of things that Thalia likes to play with). This seems to work better.

Good luck!

[Plarka]

We live in England so we don't have those great stores like Walmart, Target, etc. The store it's from is this store where you have to look up what you want in a catalogue and then go to the counter and ask for the thing and pay for it, annoying. The toys they sell are mostly just plastic commercial things.

I did give MIL an idea of what to get, and she didn't get it, but I think I will try harder next year, maybe email an Amazon wish list? I'm not sure yet if that's rude. Or say in an email, 'dd and I have been talking about what she wants for Christmas and she says she'd really like.....'

I'll see what other replies say but so far I think you're right, it's probably better to not ask for the receipt, our relationship is a bit strange. And yes, I am free to buy other things for her myself...good reminder!

[mommariffic]

My MIL gave us quite a few gifts that [Hello, Mcdonalds play kitchen] that made me want to die a little inside, but I don't want to offend her so I am freecycling some, and others are going for sale on Craigslist...I can use any small money I make back to buy DD something I like. Can you try that?

[alfabetsoup]

Have a look at the catalog--I'm pretty sure you can get play tents, doll prams, shopping carts, trucks and blocks at the store of which you speak, all are fab toys. My girls particularly enjoy their play tent so much that I don't even care that it's disney-themed.

[tessie]

Argos? There are some good toys in there. Or art/craft supplies. Or outdoor toys such trikes, tents etc. Or duplo or mega blocks. I remember going through the argos book as a kid and marking off half the toy section for my Christmas wishlist.

Or buy something you need for the household and use the cash you would have spent on that to buy DD a replacement toy elsewhere.

But I do sympathise with MILs buying unsuitable presents. I know it's the thought that counts but too small clothing and toys with small parts for an over 3 are common here.

[newtomotherhood]

I understand DD is 9 months and MIL gave her kindersurprise and a doll that says right on the front 3 years and up due to small pieces! I understand that she doesn't live near by and doesn't see DD very much but some common sense in the purchasing of gifts would be nice.
I have nothing against her otherwise, it's just frustrating. I plan to give the doll to charity next xmas and give the kinders away to some other kids I know.
You could also try regifting it!

[JL83]

Personally, I'd make a real effort to see if your DD likes it now.

If she doesn't, then you can be honest and say that for some reason your DD is scared of it and wonder if maybe either your MIL would like it back to exchange it or something.

I wouldn't do anything without trying at least once more to see if your DD will like it.

[Drummer's Wife]

If your DD is still afraid of it, I would either give it away or see if you can't find something at the store it came from to exchange it for. I don't think I would be comfortable asking for a gift reciept, though. I would much rather just pass it on to a child who does love it.