Please send us happy vibes this week!! - Page 3

[Thandiwe]

Originally Posted by queenjane

I absolutely dont think you are telling any "lies"...its just crazy to me that stuff like this can happen.

Originally Posted by Sierra

Hon, just to be clear, I wasn't accussing anyone of anything.

I know, I know. Honestly, I'm just kind of a wreck this week. It's been survival around here, just getting through the days. I let myself hope and believe, and now I'm just mad and hurt. Super defensive, super everything. Oh how I wish it wasn't in the midst of crazy pregnancy hormones! Let's just say this week I have done a number to a tray my husband bought of cheesecake from our local sprawl-Mart. I think my midwife may not be too happy about my weight gain this week....

[Irishmommy]

I'm still astounded at the lack of lawyer for CPS, it boggles my mind.

[Polliwog]

Mine, too. I can't envision how that's supposed to work.

[tiffani]

[PlayaMama]

i'm so sorry the system is failing here. i'm sorry it fails at all, but i'm really sorry it's failing you and this little girl.

[lauren]

Originally Posted by Thandiwe

I'm just losing my hope in the system. I don't know what else to do. I wish I was loaded with money and it was legit for me to hire a better lawyer for baby. I know a kick-a** family lawyer who would blow this out of the water. But alas I'm a sahm who could never afford her, and I don't think I'm even legally allowed to replace her attorney.
.

I don't know if you are allowed to do this, but many attorneys have to take on a certain number of 'pro bono' (free) or reduced fee cases. It might be worth a call with this one to see if she would do this or if it is legal for her to get involved.

[Thandiwe]

Originally Posted by lauren

I don't know if you are allowed to do this, but many attorneys have to take on a certain number of 'pro bono' (free) or reduced fee cases. It might be worth a call with this one to see if she would do this or if it is legal for her to get involved.

I should give her a call and ask. Does anyone else know if it is legal to hire an attorney to replace the GAL or is that not allowed because of my "conflict of interest" and intent to adopt if legal availability arises??

[Sierra]

Thandiwe,

When ds was still ours in foster care, we had a situation where we talked briefly about hiring an attorney. In summary, it basically involved a maternal family member feeling pressured to take ds just to prevent an inappropriate paternal placement from happening. ds' interests weren't represented by either scenario, so the maternal family member asked if there was some way we could fight it legally on our end...or take an alternative legal approach (such as seeking "third party custody").

There was a family law attorney in the church I was serving, so I mentioned this to her just to feel her out. I presented it like, "I can't imagine foster parents actually feel free enough to fight the system ever." She told me I would be surprised at the cases that come through. She had seen foster parents fighting the system, and even represented a few.

You could not hire an attorney to replace the GAL as far as I can tell. The GAL is supposed to be the neutral third party representing only the interests of the child. If you hire someone to serve in such a role, they would have a conflict of interest and would represent you essentially.

However, there may be other legal options. At this time, for example, you may have the ability to fight for guardianship of the child.

The laws around this stuff vary so much from place to place, and I don't know that there are lawyers on here. Only a family law attorney in your location is going to be able to give you the scoop on your options. You should seek a consultation from somebody *experienced with the children's department and its cases.* Once you know the legal options, you can discuss the pros and cons to each (for example, in our case, we decided we didn't want to risk burning bridges with the state by questioning the course of the case because after all that, being able to do anything at all about the matter was far, far from certain).

You may or may not be able to do anything, but it is worth actually getting solid information about that.

[DTmama1]

Do be cautious about seeking advice. A foster family I know in our area was fighting reunification and used a private investigator, used lawyers, etc. They unfortunately lost their case and are probably losing their foster license now. I think the private investigator was the biggest issue (breach of confidentiality). I would encourage you to go forth, but do so quietly. DCS will probably get ticked off when they hear you have sought outside guidance.

[Polliwog]

Hiring a private investigator was a really bad idea.

The SW in Thandiwe's case isn't happy with how the case is going. So, it's a bit different. And the baby's been with her for 18 months. I wonder if since there seems to be so much nepotism (not the term I'm looking for but it seems like the GAL is too friendly with the attorneys and not being impartial) that social services can request a new GAL be appointed.

[Thandiwe]

Originally Posted by Polliwog

I wonder if since there seems to be so much nepotism (not the term I'm looking for but it seems like the GAL is too friendly with the attorneys and not being impartial) that social services can request a new GAL be appointed.

This is where I'm hitting a brick wall. Our sw knows of the trouble, sees it clearly. She has said she's had parents in the past who have complained to the bar association. Our licensing worker this past summer urged me to write a letter to the referee, which I did including a forward to the sw. At the next hearing, referee pulled attorney aside, gave him the letter (watched it happen), then the attorney was even more mad. He recommended completely AGAINST social services that day. Thankfully the referee ignored it and made his own rulings, but it was a slap in the face. I'm a peon who means nothing. They have this I'll-scratch-your-back mentality. I am afraid to go to the judge above him for fear of stirring too much water and not being successful.

But you're right, Polliwog. The sw finally is fed up and disgusted with the rulings.