first diaper free day - totally frustrating, need encouragement!!

[georgiamum]

so, I've been meaning to stop using diapers on my 13 month old for a while and it seemed smart to wait until after the holidays. he's been in cloth dipes and I always checked him frequently and changed him every time he was wet, so I thought I had a good idea about how much he peed. yesterday he was in undies the whole day and i wrote down every time he nursed/drank/peed. it was crazy how much he peed! here's a typical timeline: 1-1:10 nurse, 1:25 pee, 1:35 pee, 1:45 pee! he did that exact pattern every hour yesterday and refused the potty most of the day. He peed in his pants over 20 times!! I was going out of my mind. (but of course didn't express that to him)

when he uses the potty, he usually has two or three "squirts" of pee. I think what happened is that when he felt wet in his undies he stopped peeing, and then started again 10 minutes later and the same thing happened. maybe he is learning that being wet doesn't feel good?

is it going to get better? I was really feeling like what I'm doing is crazy and kinda pointless. especially because he is refusing the potty so much lately, and I've tried everything, moving the potty to different rooms, using the sink/bath/toilet, etc. nothing helps.

any advice/encouragement is appreciated!

[accountclosed3]

it does get easier.

what i find with my little guy is that he pees frequently in the am. . .and i have a tendency to leave him diaper free. . . but in the afternoon, he pees much less and more all-at-once.

i don't know why this is the case, but it is the case.

we just started working with trainers, so he's getting the hang of it--though i still prefer diaper free time.

[sgmom]

Originally Posted by georgiamum

I think what happened is that when he felt wet in his undies he stopped peeing, and then started again 10 minutes later and the same thing happened. maybe he is learning that being wet doesn't feel good?

This is what my daughter used to do in her gerber trainers. Every 10-20 minutes she'd "leak", so I'd put her on the potty and NOTHING. But if I put a diaper on her she'd stay dry for a long time, before completely releasing her bladder (in the diaper). It drove me crazy, but it does seem to be just something she went through (learning to recognize the feeling of wetness) and things are getting MUCH better now.

Hang in there! It DOES get better.

[georgiamum]

zoebird, thanks for the encouragement. normally he pees more in the morning, but I think the undies made him pee all day! and it's too cold for nakey bum where I live.

SG, that does sound exactly like what my baby is doing. He stayed dry in a diaper when we went out for 90 minutes, but went back to peeing like crazy as soon as we were home and in undies. maybe I need to just stay out of the house all the time!

SG - how long did this phase last for you?

[KermitII63]

I have the same issue with my ds and we've been offering him the sink or potty since he was about 3 weeks old. We'll have a 15 hour block where he's in the same diaper, and then the next day he'll pee four diapers in an hour. I think a lot of it has to do with their mood, your mood, and how they're feeling on any given day. Usually my ds goes 7-10 days w/o pooping in a diaper, and he's pooped four diapers in the last two days! The biggest challenge is to not be too caught up in the outcome and to remind yourself that you're doing it for your son's comfort. That is my biggest challenge, but when I get less stressed about it, that's usually when we have the most success. Have you been using the potty on and off or did you start today? A big change in routine might have just put him in a different head space. But my ds absolutely pees every 15 minutes for blocks of time. He's almost 5 months and has been this way pretty much since birth. A good (but somewhat expensive) option might be to get some training pants--I've been meaning to myself. Oh and one more thing--think about split crotch pants--I hear they work quite well in colder climates, and outside pees are sometimes more enjoyable for babes, especially boys )

[georgiamum]

thanks kermit. you are definitely right about their moods. we've been using the potty since he was 10 weeks and he's 13 months now, so peeing every 15 minutes isn't typically what he does at this age. his bladder is much bigger and he's gone for 2 hours without peeing! as is common, we had very few misses when he was little (and of course I thought it would stay that way forever ) but once he started crawling things changed a lot and we have never gotten things back to the way they were, which also typical, I hear. I put him in underwear instead of trainers because he has always worn cloth diapers and it was clear to me that the trainers just felt like another diaper to him. the underwear feels different so he is peeing differently!

[tbmum]

Hi Georgiamum,
oh yes, it will definitely change, you've probably just overwhelmed the both of you!

What if you just went diaper-free in the mornings for a couple of hours, or in the arvo? (They often pee less then) That way, you can both feel more relaxed, you can have a bunch of flannels nearby and 'expect' to wipe up some wees as he gets the idea.

It is a step from going in the diaper to going out in the air!

Remember - 'practicing' EC is about the opportunities to communicate, to help him learn about his body - not about fast toilet training.

Relax, see that his diet is 'clean' of any additives etc that may also be encouraging rampant peeing, and give him a spell to get used to being diaper free - perhaps he is just really excited to see his body in action!

-Charndra

[sgmom]

Originally Posted by georgiamum

SG - how long did this phase last for you?

Sorry!! I thought I replied to this!

It lasted EASILY a few days (4-5) to about 2 weeks, off and on. Some days I'd follow the "3 miss rule". If I had 3 misses in a row (in the gerbers), she went back in diapers. Some days it would work, others it would not. So when I got tired of playing that game, I just changed her every time she wet them... even if that meant changing her every 10 minutes, and I would only put her back in a diaper (or a cloth diaper cover) during the times I could not maintain dry undies (like while cooking dinner). I also don't leave her in the gerbers if she's in a room where she'll make little wet butt prints (like in her bedroom... she'll pee, then go sit on her bed).

It was at least 2 weeks before I could put her in the gerbers and they would stay dry for over an hour (sometimes 2 hours), but we had the odd day here and there where I could see a light at the end of the tunnel (then she'd take a wrong turn and the light would disappear, but it always came back).

It was a LOT of work, but I think that in combination with all the EC we've done, it definitely raised her awareness. She's starting to grab herself now when she's wet, or is just about to pee. And her new favorite thing is taking a wet wipe and wiping herself (usually over a diaper). I haven't figured out if that means anything or if she's just trying to copy me when I give her a wipe, but I'm trying to go with it.

[seraf]

13 months is such a fun age. It may be a good time to introduce peeing standing up. When my son was a pretty young 1, showing him how to make "pee bubbles" was a hit and helped get us back to dry. If he stands on the toilet seat (supported) and pees into the bowl, he should be rewarded with bubbles on the surface of the water. You can pour water from waist height the first time to show him (like, 10 minutes after he nurses when his bladder is nice and full and he is already undressed and standing up there). My son loved it. It only held his interest briefly, but that got us back on track.

Another silly idea is, when you know he'll need to go, sit him on the potty next to the toilet for a "rocket ride" or wheelse on the bus and you each have a plate or roll of duck tape or whatever for a steering wheel and sit on your potties and fly/drive around, he may be interested just long enough to pee, especially if you have lots of falling water sound effects.

Good luck!

[hrsmom]

That sounds very familiar!!!! I ended up just having her wear diapers and then trainers a lot. Oh, gotta go!
ETA- not that that is the "right" way to go, but that is what we ended up doing!!