My first night at home

[NSmomtobe]

Hi everyone,

I had my baby this weekend and got home from the hospital yesterday. We were able to put our son in his crib in the afternoon/evening for a few hours between feedings. We were told not to let him go more than 4 hours without feeding him, so we woke him up to feed him before DH and I went to bed. The problem was, of course, that after feeding him, he would not go back to bed. He screamed to be held and he seemed to be hungry, even though I had just finished feeding him! I spent the entire night switching him from one breast to the other. He fell asleep on each breast, but woke when I tried to move him to any type of position that would be comfortable for me to sleep in. Needless to say, I got no sleep (and I *need* sleep in order to recover from labour and delivery). Fortunately my husband rescued me around 4 am when I started force-feeding the baby vitamin D drops to fill him up. I was concerned that he was hungry because my milk hasn't come in yet, but I don't know if he was hungry as much as he was nursing for comfort. He slept soundly in my husband's arms until 7:30, while I was able to nap. Of course that meant that my husband didn't sleep. So I guess the baby needed to be held more than he needed food. But he wouldn't even sleep in the bed beside me because the transfer from pillow to bed would wake him up.

I'm trying to figure out what I can do differently tonight, but I have a couple of additional questions:
1. When will my milk come in? Will he be less hungry after this?
2. How/when can I learn to nurse lying down? I have heard that it's too early to do this at this point.

Any advice/words of encouragement?

[hotharmony]

Side laying nursing is the answer here an unless your baby is very very small there should be no problem doing it, you might not be able to sleep while nursing but you will be able to rest and eventually get the hang of latch, nurse, sleep.

Here is some great directions: http://www.mother-2-mother.com/tut-layingdown.htm.

Also give the little guy a break and yourself it's a hard ajustment coming out of the womb.

[tanyam926]

((((Hugs)))) to you first of all and congrats on your new baby!

Your milk will come in 3-5 days after delivery. Nursing often is a must and will help to establish a good milk supply. I remember when ds2 was born and he seemed sooooo hungry before my milk came in (my other 2 boys weren't like that). I nursed him constantly and my milk came in in just less than 3 days. Even if your baby is just nursing for comfort, that's okay! Babies are born w/a need to suck so don't feel bad about meeting that need.

Even though your baby is tiny you can definately learn to nurse while lying down. I learned early bc I always planned to cosleep and it is def a must learn skill! In fact, I clearly remember crawling into bed minutes after ds3 was born (home water birth in the middle of the night) and going to sleep while nursing him.

Sidelying nursing will take some practice but here's some tips:

1. Get comfy before you get baby latched on
2. Prop baby's head on your arm facing you and turn toward baby or
3. Turn completely on your side and lay baby on their side facing you

It can also help to lay baby on a pillow to raise him/her closer to the breast, I did this when they were tiny but always removed the pillow before falling asleep (not safe to sleep w/pillows around or under baby).

It's great that daddy was able to cuddle baby while you slept. It REALLY helps to take turns (my dh and I did this too) so you can both rest. Plus, it helps daddy gain confidence w/baby which helps build their relationship. My dh was so proud that he could always get baby to sleep.

The first week or two are just hard. Everyone is adjusting and getting into a routine, you are exhausted (and your dh probably is too), so be easy on yourself. It's okay to say no to visitors or keep visits short. I enlisted my mom and my dh to make sure I wasn't bombarded w/people. It gets sooo much better though around the end of the second wk.

I would caution against giving the baby too much vitamin D though (couldn't tell exactly what you meant about the vit D).

One last thing, make sure the baby is latched on well at every feeding so that you can avoid BF problems and bc if baby is not transferring milk well then he will seem hungry all the time and nurse constantly. No pain while latching/nursing is a good sign.

You are doing a great job!

[lifeguard]

Even once your milk comes in you may find dc wants/needs to bf more often than you anticipate - that's ok. Try, try, try to sleep when he sleeps even if it is the middle of the day. It takes some time for them to get their sleep cycles sorted out & in the meantime sleep can come in sporadic bits.

For me it took some time to learn to side-lie & bf. I have very large breasts though & I think that can sometimes make it more tricky. I did figure out a sitting position with pillows propped around me that I could doze in while bfing & that helped.

Congrats on your new baby!

[NSmomtobe]

Another night and another issue...

Thank you to those who responded to my original post. Our second night went slightly better, partly because I was able to sleep a little bit with the baby in bed (although without pillows, aren't you worried about the baby falling out of bed or between bed and wall?), and I think we will be able to master the side nursing position eventually, but at this point, I was worried about crushing him with my breasts, so I only kept him there for short periods of time.

What I noticed last night was that DS would not nurse for long periods of time (up to 5 minutes, at most) before detaching/falling asleep, and losing interest altogether. I am very concerned that he is not getting enough. What I have realized since then is that my milk is coming in, so I wonder if that is the reason he is eating less, but shouldn't he be eating more than he is? Also, I wonder if his nose being stuffed up is contributing to not being able to stay latched for long. I talked to my doctor today and he suggested that we use saline nose drops and I will call Public Health tomorrow for help with breastfeeding.

The vitamin D drops involve a 1 mL serving to be delivered by mouth through an eye dropper. However, whenever I try to give these drops, DS sounds like he is drowning, so I have only been giving half servings, and I will wait to give the next one in front of Public Health in order to make sure I am doing it right.

[bicyclingbethany]

For your son's stuffiness, I really recommended the nosefrida. It sucks out the snot WAY better than the bulb. You can get it at Whole Foods or online.

[kismetbaby]

Congrats!!! The first couple weeks are just hard! Especially as a first-timer. You won't get much sleep, and it will seem like forever, but it will get easier quickly. My son still won't sleep at night without me or dh in bed with him, but we have learned to nurse laying down and personally I love sleeping with my LO. But it was hard in the beginning. . .I didn't get the hang of side-laying nursing for many weeks.

What we did in the first weeks was: I'd sit up in bed to nurse him, then when he was done put him on my chest to burp and I'd recline back on some pillows and we'd just sleep like this in bed till the next nursing. And every few sessions, my DH would take him for the burp-sleep on the chest. He would not stay asleep if we put him down! But then at around 4 weeks old he started wanting to be put down on his back to sleep and now he won't sleep in our chests. So things change fast with newborns.

The first week when your milk is coming in can be challenging and full of questions. . .I really hope you are able to find someone to help and offer support! If you can't afford a lactation consultant please call your local La Leche League leader, they are always willing to offer support. It's so hard to know if they are eating enough, being too sleepy, etc. But all sucking is necessary whether its "comfort" sucking or vigorous eating. Newborns need to suck and it will help your milk supply to let him suck as much as he wants. But their tummies are also very,very tiny, so they really can't take in a lot at once. Funny how nursing a newborn can take up literally most of your day (and night) and yet their stomach is so small that they are only eating one or two ounces at a time.

A great book if you can get it fast is Breast Feeding Made Simple: Seven Natural Laws for the Nursing Mother. It explains the first few weeks really well.

He could be nursing less b/c of the stuffy nose, it makes it hard for them to BF. A few other things to consider with the nose: a humidifier can really help and he may be reacting to dust or down feathers in your bed(room). Saline drops works wonders too.

It gets easier mama. . .keep up the good work!