Night time advice

[First Time Mama]

My DS is 2, and we share and family bed and have since his birth. He still wakes at night and nurses back to sleep, as well as nursing to fall asleep intially. For the last 4 or 5 nights it has taken me 2 hours to get him to fall asleep. We do our routine, often a bath, bedtime stories, listen to a lullaby cd, nurse, and then nurse, and nurse, and then he talks and talks, and asks me to sing to him, and then nurses and then asks for DH, and when he comes, then he asks for me, and then he wants to get up and play, and then so on... He used to only wake two or three times at night to nurse and that was okay with me. Now it's more often and I am starting to resent it. I don't want to nurse him everytime he wakes up, partly because I'm staying up to late and am tired. I don't want to spend my entire night getting him to sleep, I want time for myself and time to spend with DH. But I don't want to leave him to cry either. I have left the room and left him lying in bed, and after a few minutes he runs out and exclaims happily "I'm awake now!" I tried nightweaning him about two months ago for a few nights and it went badly. I was so exhausted in the moring that I couldn't keep my eyes open, I feel more rested when I let him nurse. DH has tried putting him to bed a little bit, but DS usually cries and asks for me, and DH comes and gets me. It seems when I'm in the house, DS wants me and won't settle for DH. I have thought about getting him a toddler bed and putting it in our bedroom or in his playroom eventually, but at this point I don't think he would go for it... Help! Is this just a phase? Bedtime used to work beautifully I would start about an hour before I wanted him to sleep and he's nurse and go to sleep, and now he's just resisting it so much while he is obviously very tired. I hate that I am resenting nursing and this morning I yelled at DS, because I was so tired and he woke me to nurse. I don't want our co sleeping or nursing to end on a bad note.

[pife]

I have 2 yo twins and here are a couple of things I changed that have helped me. I nurse them in the livingroom before we got to bed and no longer nurse them to sleep - instead they each snuggle in the crook of my arms to start and then they either stay there or break away for the pillow... I have night weaned the one who used to nures the most. He gets a snuggle and a binky. The other I still nurse back to sleep once, usually around 2-3am. I think the challenge is to get him to no longer associate nursing with sleeping. I wish you all the best! I am trying to figure out how to get them out of my bed!! :-)

[Maluhia]

Does he still have a nap? Is he maybe ready to drop that?

Can you leave DH and him home for a few nights in a row and wait at a coffee shop until DH does (lovingly) without giving in to you in the living room? Maybe your child will react better and "accept" your DH putting him down the first few times as long as you are not right there for your child to want more and DH to give in to frustration and give up?